Trump Argues E. Jean Carroll Verdict Should Be Thrown Out Because Of Airplane Law
He gets away with everything, so maybe this will work too?
On Friday, while his son Barron was starting his first week of college over at NYU, probably taking Gender Studies classes in between smoking jays with the Naughty Knitters Club, his daddy was a few blocks downtown, trying to weasel out of his $5 million sexual assault judgment in the E. Jean Carroll defamation case.
Which is not to be confused with the $83.3 million judgment (with interest) that Trump also got for defaming her. Or Trump’s appeal for his New York civil fraud judgment, which is now up to $476 million, and is on the schedule for September 26.
No, Friday’s appeal was a 22-minute hearing about how the first E. Jean assault judgment was so unfair to Trump, because prosecutors brought in evidence from two other women, Jessica Leeds and Natasha Stoynoff, who testified that the nasty creep pulled the same “like he had 40 zillion hands” pouncing ambush of non-consensual groping, followed by the same denying-and-defaming routine with them. And, argued Emil Bove and Todd Blanche in their brief, it’s all very unfair to Trump because George Conway exists, it allegedly happened a long time ago, and also Jessica Leeds claimed to have been groped on an airplane, and airplane groping doesn’t count! For real. It’s right there on page 22 of their brief!
Leeds’ testimony adequately described violations of 18 U.S.C. §§ 2241(a) and 2244(a), which are part of chapter 109A. SPA.27 n.12. The fatal flaw in this reasoning is that those provisions are limited to conduct undertaken in the “special maritime and territorial jurisdiction of the United States,” as defined in 18 U.S.C. § 7, and prisons. Airspace is not part of the “special maritime and territorial jurisdiction” unless the plane is “in flight over the high seas, or over any other waters.
Good thing he has no shame! But this panel of three judges is not getting expense-paid trips from Harlan Crow, and reportedly sounded skeptical. At best.
Trump’s lawyer John Lauro also whined about inadmissible prior acts. Hey, it worked for Harvey Weinstein, who got his New York rape conviction thrown out because the testimony from all the other women he allegedly raped with the exact same modus operandi was prejudicial, which was terribly victimizing to the poor accused rapist. But Weinstein’s case was in state court, and criminal, and this is federal court, and civil. And there’s also all the other evidence the jury saw, like Trump’s sneering deposition, wherein he sat there in a terribly fitting suit, lying that he’d never met Carroll, hissing that she wasn’t his type, then mixing up Carroll with Marla Maples.
After court, Trump headed to Trump Tower, where he held a 50-minute rambling no-questions press conference, defaming Carroll and the other witnesses some more, because that’s his pattern. He bashed his lawyers who were standing right behind him, (“I’m disappointed in my legal talent, I’ll be honest with you”), as is his way, and also had some defamatory shit to say about Leeds and Stoynoff. Because he is a man with no new moves whatsoever! His rant was so crazy, the Washington Post even called him “unfocused.” He even besmirched Anderson Cooper, which pissed off the Silver Fox so much that Cooper fact-checked him.
But nothing new about these lies, or the fact that Trump’s brain is pudding. We’ve heard it all before! Other than his lawyers arguing plane law, that’s a new one.
“I have no idea who the woman is. I never met her,” he repeated. “I would have had no interest in meeting her, in any way shape or form. Her husband was a news anchor actually, John Johnson, a very nice guy, she called him horrible things … he’s a very nice guy, African-American.” He blathered again that Carroll got her story from a plot of “Law & Order,” and blah blah blah.
Previously!
This part of the ramble seems to be, one supposes, about Jessica Leeds: “She says in 1979 I was in an airplane with her, a commercial flight, and we became very intimate. I was famous then too […] never happened, she’s a Clinton person, she made up the story, so many years ago. [...] I was famous then too. I’ve been famous for a long time. I believe I had some pretty big success then, and I was being talked about a lot. Maybe The Art of the Deal was out, you know, sometime after that, I’m not sure. But I was well known. And passengers are coming into the plane, and she said I was making out with her, and then, after 15 minutes — and then she changed her story a couple of times, maybe it was quicker — that I grabbed her at a certain part, and that was when she had enough. So think of the impracticality of this. What are the chances of that happening? What are the chances?”
It couldn’t have happened, because he was so famous then, passengers would have mobbed him with tears in their eyes, saying “sir, sir, please sign my copy of The Art of The Deal,” then they would have immediately called up Cindy Adams, agog over the unique, aurora-borealis-like spectacle of seeing a New York slumlord canoodling on a plane, of course. And also, like Carroll, Leeds is just too uggo for him.
“And, frankly, I know you’re going to think it’s a terrible thing to say, but it couldn’t have happened. It didn’t happen. And, she would not have been the chosen one. She would not have been the chosen one.”
Who, him, have a pattern?
Anyway, the three-judge panel reportedly sounded skeptical at best. They’ll issue a decision whenever they fucking feel like it, probably a few months, most likely after the election, maybe in 2025. Because, again, he gets away with fucking everything. As most rapists do, statistically speaking.
It’s depressing, and gross, the end!
Michael Steele is not at all wrong:
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"We have patty-caked this man all the way through this process," he began. "Our courts have exposed their rear end more than I have ever seen them do for anybody and it makes absolutely no sense."
"So, let it go to the Supreme Court, let them monkey around with it so that we can deal with that at the ballot box!" he exclaimed. "If they want to show their political hand, then force their political hand. Do not give this man more cachet than any other."
"He is a former president, which means he is no different than anyone sitting at this table," he continued. "And the fact that, as the court says, the imposition of sentence will be adjourned to avoid any appearance, 'however unwarranted.' So, the fact that you have to tell me that, alright? Goes on to say that the 'proceeding has been affected by, or seeks to affect the approaching presidential election.' This has nothing to do — you wouldn't do this if a governor was a candidate running for governor was in the exact same position. If a candidate was running for U.S. Senate was in the exact same position."
"There's no difference in those offices, in terms of the judicial system. So, why?" he asked. "Why does this court, this judicial system, which Donald Trump has punked from day one, with all of the — you know, the excess appeals and the bogus crap that he raises, you know, we see it now playing out with E. Jean Carroll case yet again — you want us to trust the system? But as a citizen, I am looking at it and going, 'That is not going to happen to me if I am in that position.""
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He's right. Fuck it, let SCOTUS intervene if they're going to.
If I'm six weeks from an election after this court's history of open, wanton fuckery, a court that has been, to one degree or another on trial in the court of public opinion since Dobbs, the idea of them interceding now would make me all tingly in my nethers.
"And, she would not have been the chosen one. She would not have been the chosen one."
This phrasing is worse than his usual "too ugly" or "not my type" bullshit.
This implies that it's an *honor* to be raped by Trump, that his victims are "lucky" or "blessed". It really leans into the whole cult leader personna, and it's beyond creepy on so many levels.