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Message from Joe Biden:

I apologize for the wild fires out west. We established a base on Mars and installed a gigantic laser. It was supposed to be aimed at Mar-a-Lago but the coordinates were off just a little and at millions of miles away that can result in quite a misfire. However, the calculations are now corrected and we will be doing a test firing in 72 hours, so if you have any wedding or dinner plans there, please cancel them. And if anyone is still in possession of any classified documents at that location you might want to remove them.

Sorry for the inconvenience

Joe Biden

Will this satisfy Trump?

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Why didn’t he just use the Jewish space lasers in orbit?

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Message from Joe Biden:

I apologize for the wild fires out west. We established a base on Mars and installed a gigantic laser. It was supposed to be aimed at Mar-a-Lago but the coordinates were off just a little and at millions of miles away that can result in quite a misfire. However, the calculations are now corrected and we will be doing a test firing in 72 hours, so if you have any wedding or dinner plans there, please cancel them. And if anyone is still in possession of any classified documents at that location you might want to remove them.

Sorry for the inconvenience

Joe Biden

Will this satisfy Trump?

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I secretly kind of hope Hunter Biden actually did do a whole bunch of corruption crimes in Ukraine, and that, despite their best efforts, Republicans will never turn up actual evidence against him or be able to make anything stick.

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"exists only in his brain..."

Assumes facts not in evidence.

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founding

Well, now we know what it would have been like if America, instead of prosecuting and imprisoning Al Capone, we had installed him in the White House. Except that Capone was a far better public speaker, as well as an organizer of no small talent.

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Al Capone ran soup kitchens that served hot soup to nobodies, Trump served cold McD's to NBA champs.

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Or was it the College Football Champs? Or both?

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it may have been, I forget, so much cringe during that time.

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founding

I vaguely recall that one of those declined the invitation, not being desirous of being in the presence of so foul a thing as Der Fuehrer.

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Does Preparation H make a Trump strength formula?

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if the US reelects PAB, we'll be the most worthless nation on the planet.

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founding

It would be SO easy to get rid of this great orange carbuncle if only the United States of America recognized and supported the International Criminal Court.

We worry a lot, and with good reason, that Trump's jury will be packed with Trump cultists who will acquit him, or that he will appeal all the way up to the Supreme Court and receive a Constitution-combusting, democracy-destroying exoneration.

This would NOT happen in The Hague.

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I was just working on writing up my running rants/ research on the actual Biden/ Ukraine misadventures. Something even I hadn't noticed before, the whole thing and why it looked very bad was reported in the "mainstream" press no later than December 2015. And nobody cared.

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Links. Let us read this Very Bad Thing.

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Just getting to this, I'm still running things down, but the name of the guy claiming credit for breaking the actual story is James Risen. Unfortunately, the most significant content is paywalled. Of course, the guy denounced the "Ukrainegate" conspiracist spin years ago.

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Liiiike? What thing?

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Biden should just roll over him with his bike.

"Wow. President Biden is biking right now in Delaware & a crowd shouts, “Four more years.” This is the energy & enthusiasm for President Biden the media won’t show you. People are fired up for President Biden & it’s amazing."

https://twitter.com/Victorshi2020/status/1686052835543203857

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Try to picture PAB riding a bike

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In some forms of Japanese stage performance there are stage hands called Kuroko. Dressed all in black they do things like move parts of the set around and move objects to represent things like animals. The audience is supposed to treat them as if they aren't there. For Trump to look like he was riding a bicycle he'd need Kuroko to hold him and the bike up. And the Trumpists would all claim there were no black clad minions carrying him down the road, that they were fake news.

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They do that in Prague puppet-theater as well.

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That's not entirely fair. Yakusha (actors) in the kabuki theater tend to wear less makeup than Donald Trump.

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SMOTP doesn't roll off the tongue like SMOTI, but I could work with it.

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When Trump appeared on the scene I began to lose respect for people I knew who supported him. At this point I hold them in absolute contempt and loathe them. Without them Trump would be nothing but another slum lord in Queens still hitting the clubs looking for women with self-esteem issues

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I have a friend who I respect a bunch. He's always been a Republican but wouldn't vote for PAB in 2020.

If I see him this week, I might ask him what he thinks of his GOP, given that PAB is far and away the most popular figure in it. He's the kind of guy who'd I'd expect would give a level-headed answer; if he does then I'll post it.

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Are we missing something? Maybe Hunter Biden’s penis is really the magical cure for all the woes in the world & these genitalia-obsessed doofuses are really on to something.

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We need the whole story. I still think they went off half-cocked.

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Do you have a neighbor or friend you can talk to?

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THE MAGIC STICK!!!

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Jul 31, 2023·edited Jul 31, 2023

"Stupidest man on the planet."

Every person who voted for him enters the chat room.

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Jul 31, 2023·edited Jul 31, 2023

Wait, I'm trying to figure out the logic here. So... Trump wants the DOJ and the IRS to hand over information about a current investigation to Congress, for the purpose of - what? - I assume, having public hearings that might politically damage Biden by revealing, um, bad stuff about him so people won't vote for him; And he wants the guy who is the supposed target of the investigation to instruct the DOJ to agree to this?

Never Have We Ever seen any Law Enforcement agency simply prematurely release all details of an investigation prior to indictment and trial, just to enable a publicity stunt, but Trump thinks they'll simply roll over and do it because he plans to blackmail Congressional Republicans into taking the unprecedented act of derailing US foreign policy by threatening to damage THEM politically, too....

And of course if there were an actual valid case against Biden, this publicity stunt would damage it, by tainting a potential jury pool and putting witnesses in double jeopardy, thereby almost ensuring that a prosecution of Biden wouldn't succeed.....

I can't even.

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Don't worry. That brilliant plan will be replaced by a different brilliant plan by the next news cycle. In fact the previous news cycle will never have occurred and what's the matter with you this has ALWAYS been the plan I never said that I've never met that person covfefe

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Holy fuk, still at war with Eastasia, then?

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Plus.....Trump also seems to be banking on the amazing persuasive power that a Congressional hearing would have to turn Biden voters away.....when the only reason he's in the running for 2024 is because two Congressional impeachment hearings and a very competent J6 committee hearing didn't have an ounce of effect in changing Trump supporters' minds. So - I guess his brilliant ideas is to completely overturn the DOJ, Congress, and US Foreign policy in order to achieve a goal that, when it was applied to him, he denounced as an ineffective hoax.

"Congress's investigation of me was a lying hoax, but I demand under threat of a Constitutional crisis that Congress be allowed to.....conduct another "hoax?"

SMDH.

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All other things being equal, Trump seems to be implying that Biden voters are more ethical than his own voters: that, when presented with "proof" (scare quotes in this case) of wrongdoing, Biden voters will righteously rise up and reject him.

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"Wait, I'm trying to figure out the logic here."

Let me stop you right there.

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"Never Have We Ever seen any Law Enforcement agency simply prematurely release all details of an investigation prior to indictment and trial, just to enable a publicity stunt."

I think Comey came close with Anthony Weiner's (not Hunter's wiener) laptop investigation disclosure just prior to the Clinton/PAB election.

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I want him to live just long enough to ratfuck the GOP chances at beating Biden. Then I'd be very happy to never hear his dumb voice again.

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As I've said before, my own ideal fantasy scenario is one where Trump and DeSantis enter the convention with neither having quite enough votes to secure the nomination. This leads to lots and lots of ballots, until DeSantis squeaks through by one vote at 3 a.m. The Trump people promptly start brawling with the DeSantis people, the RNC shuts down the convention, and DeSantis gives his "acceptance speech" in a prerecorded statement online. He then spends the rest of the campaign hiding from the Trump lunatics who keep turning up at his rallies, in many cases heavily armed, to heckle and threaten him. Trump urges his followers to sit out the election.

Biden, of course, wins in a landslide.

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Biden wins by a landslide in pretty much every rational scenario.

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You forgot that since the Cubs won the World Series in 2016 we slid into the darkest timeline

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(speaking as non sports chicago person), i knew there was some preternatural bargain and it filled me with dread.

same as brexit vote.

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Correct- I remember during the series someone asked Chris Hayes on twitter to honestly answer if he'd take trump winning the election as the price for the Cubbies winning the series. I don't remember if Chris responded, but we know what happened...

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Damn you, I paid big money for that brainwipe!

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Of course he does, but these days, "rational" has got nothing to do with it.

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