411 Comments
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kmblue187's avatar

"Everything Trump touches dies."

Ariel Causa's avatar

The Belgians resent was epic (no one hates like has-been little despots): they scored 4 goals (the third was particularly cringe), they did the Trump dance and after the match they convinced the Seattle stadium DJ to play Stromae's "Alors on danse". That was a nice touch.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

Call me a wet blanket, but it seems that there are real problems to worry about other than Fatberg pulling strings so Eric doesn't lose the bets he made after being told by UFC that the soccer game was fixed.

Like, how do we get out of Substack's time loop hell?

Teddy Barnes's avatar

Also, he might be dead then.

Be still my beating heart.......

Rosemary Orlandi's avatar

if jd is pres then, we need to keep him away also. remember Pope Francis ? just sayin

Maybe's avatar

trumpy is a highly contagious cancer.

Paytheline's avatar

Terrible game played by USA. The players were simply unable to get to the ball. These colors don’t run!

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Gary. I don't care at all about sports, but this was egregious. Typical for That Thing in the Offal Office.

Terence Dougherty's avatar

As Tom Waits would ask, “What’s he building in there?”

“We have a right to know “

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

Clearly the USMNT lost because antifa cut a 350 foot gash in the field with a box cutter

Teddy Barnes's avatar

Yeah......the gash funneled the ball into our goal 4 times!!!!!

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

Posted this last night

Just watching the USMNT getting completely outclassed by Belgium and thinking I probably wasted half my day upset about Balogun and Trump for absolutely no reason

#World #Cup

eo's avatar

I was enjoying reading this article until I was reminded that Trump could still be President in 2028.

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

Read an article which said that prior to this intervention the US team was fired up, with a chip on their shoulders for what was generally seen to be a bad call on the red card. They were going to come into the game with something to prove, and show the world they could win no matter the odds!!

And then…Grampa Assmouth jumped in. And then…Belgium was the team with a chip on their shoulders, who had been done wrong, who had something to prove, who were fired up.

Thanks, you fucking fucker.

Miss American's avatar

The Midas Smutch ...

Way Left of Center's avatar

"undermined the integrity of the tournament ..."

Whoa Nelly! That ship sailed during the gold participation trophy event.

Robert Eckert's avatar

He needs to touch himself more often