Trump Pissed Off As British Court Flushes Pee Tape Lawsuit
He's reportedly been plunged into despair.
How much of a losing streak is gigantic loser Donald Trump on in his continuing legal fights? He’s now losing cases in other countries, meaning his losing streak can be said to have gone global. Loser.
This week the United Kingdom High Court, which is sort of like America’s Supreme Court without the blatant partisanship, the off-the-charts corruption, and the dead fish levels of warmth radiated by Sam Alito, threw out a lawsuit Trump filed last year against the author of the infamous Steele Dossier, that salacious collection of raw intelligence put together by former British intelligence agent Christopher Steele that gave us such Trump-era nuggets as “Donald Trump paid Russian hookers for golden showers in a Moscow hotel room once used by Barack Obama.”
And they say satire is dead. Rightfully so, because an American president paying hookers to piss on him is a sketch idea the writers of “I Think You Should Leave” would reject as being too out there.
Trump had sued Steele’s company, Orbis Business Intelligence, saying that its compilation of all that sexxxy bullshit into a handy, easy-to-download-and-leisurely-read-while-chortling .pdf file, violated Britain’s data protection laws. The Court threw the case out on the grounds that a) the dossier came to light when Buzzfeed published it in early 2017 so Trump missed the six-year statute of limitations for filing a lawsuit, and b) eh, the defendant is a whiny titty-baby who could not possibly win the suit anyway.
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From the Washington Post:
She added that Orbis’s possession of copies of the dossier could not “sensibly” have caused Trump distress, not least because copies of it were floating around online.
“Mere storage of the Memoranda by the Defendant cannot sensibly be said to have had any impact on the Claimant — if he was even aware of it — not least in circumstances where the Memoranda are on the internet,” she wrote.
In other words, oh boo-hoo, someone put together a gossipy pile of opposition research that made fun of the world’s most visible political figure and it leaked online like everything else does, why don’t you sit down and stuff a sock into that gaping yap hole in your face.
In an impact statement he submitted to the British court last fall, Trump denied that he had “engage[d] in perverted sexual behavior including the hiring of prostitutes to engage in ‘golden showers’” nor did he participate in “sex parties” in St. Petersburg, an allegation that makes us want to put our own eyes out with a pen.
Trump also claimed that the dossier caused him “personal and reputational damage and distress.” Which is impossible since his reputation had already fallen low enough to feel the heat of the Earth’s molten core.
Orbis Business Intelligence pronounced itself “delighted” with the High Court’s decision, adding that US courts are always accusing Trump of pursuing “vexatious litigation.” Which is true. Trump loves filing nonsense lawsuits almost as much as he ALLEGEDLY loves hiring Russian hookers to piss on him.
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So add this to the pile of recent Trump losses: the $83 million defamation award a jury handed to him a week ago over his slandering the writer E. Jean Carroll, the Colorado Supreme Court declaring that the state could kick him off its presidential ballot, and the imminent decision in his civil fraud trial in New York, where Judge Arthur Engoron is expected to fine Orange Julius hundreds of millions of dollars and prevent his company from ever working in that state again.
And who knows what other losses he’s had lately, the man spends more time in front of judges than any legal figure since Hammurabi first wrote out his Code. He’ll probably have been indicted five more times before we publish this.
[BBC / Washington Post]
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"the infamous Steele Dossier, that salacious collection of raw intelligence put together by former British intelligence agent Christopher Steele that gave us such Trump-era nuggets as “Donald Trump paid Russian hookers for golden showers in a Moscow hotel room once used by Barack Obama.”"
When I first heard the story I was happy to have a laugh at a dude's embarrassing fetish being outed (I have that particular fetish myself, not that you needed to know) but hearing even more of the story just emphasized how PATHETIC the dude is.
"an American president paying hookers to piss on him is a sketch idea"
yes. that is correct. a comedy bit. because the actual claim was that he paid hookers to pee on a bed that Obama once slept in. this was then conflated to "golden showers" by comedy writers. etc. and now it seems to be that everyone believes it was hookers peeing on Trump himself.
conveniently this allows Trump to easily deny that claim. but that wasn't the actual claim to begin with.