389 Comments
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Wookiee Monster's avatar

He still owes Shaye Moss and Ruby Freeman $148 million.

Hooker P Tape skipping dipshit's avatar

"Will we ever learn where that secret settlement money for a shut-up deal came from for those women"

They were paid in rubles.

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

I believe that a judgement against him won’t go away if he dies…it just goes against his estate’s debts which must be satisfied before anyone gets anything. So sorry, Roodles’ inheritors…not a way to wipe the slate clean.

But if he wants to recover so we can keep humiliating him and he can wind up blowing sailors under a bridge for hair dye money with Alex Jones…I will allow it.

Nemo's avatar

Perhaps his heirs can pay that debt, just to restore honor to the family name. I'm sure young Andrew Giuliani will be eager to do that.

Hooker P Tape skipping dipshit's avatar

Many of his estate have probably already changed their names so not to be associated with Rudi. Except that son that resembles Eric Trump and ran for NY governor.

No Quid Bro Code's avatar

Thoughts and prayers.

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

Tots and pears, MAYBE…but no, not even that.

Fifth Dentist's avatar

"I do not come here to praise Rudy's charm; I come here to bury it."

Wookiee Monster's avatar

Can you bury something that’s nonexistent?

OneYieldRegular's avatar

In the late 80's, I had a spectacular visit to New York City. During my first hour, I witnessed a knife fight in the subway. A couple days later I took the graffiti-covered subway to see a 4 a.m. showing of a Kurosawa film that was almost as good as standing in the front car of the subway and watching the rats scatter from in front of the train. I accompanied gay friend to a leather party in a sleazy walk up in Hell's Kitchen to make sure he'd be safe there. We later went to a punk club in the Bowery near Tompkins Square. Then on our last night, we sprung for a cab from where we were staying (in an apartment next door to the old Warhol Factory) to the Village. During the cab ride, Sinatra singing "Night and Day" came on, and we voiced our approval to the cabbie, who asked if we wanted him to turn it up. We did. He did. He had installed an amazing stereo system, and the cab filled with Sinatra's voice. The song ended at the exact moment we arrived at The Five Spot, our destination for some late night jazz.

Flash forward 7 years when I visited again around the end of Ghouliani's first year as mayor. The graffiti was gone. The cabs were sterile, with Rudy's voice welcoming you to New York when you got in. The homeless people seemed to have disappeared. We saw no knife fights.

Giuliani had apparently RUINED New York.

josephebacon's avatar

Dr. Feelgood chimes in on the Iran situation...just wondering how many happy pills he chomped on before he posted this bullshit...

https://bsky.app/profile/ronfilipkowski.bsky.social/post/3ml22fvgp7s2l

Elviouslyqueer's avatar

OT but stopped clock moment for SCOTUS. They just restored access to mail-order mifepristone without necessitating an in-person doctor visit.

I am beshooken!

JanuaryClaire's avatar

Anything good from SCOTUS always has me suspicious that something sinister is in the pipeline.

VaselineHabits's avatar

Exactly, and anytime we've celebrated the littlest victory - there's WAY WORSE making it's way to us.

Matt Rudow's avatar

Truly a sad day for cousin-marriers everywhere.

AJ Milne's avatar

I vaguely remember I think it was a genetics prof once explaining to a class that the buildup of deleterious mutations due inbreeding is usually a cumulative thing. Repeated, sustained inbreeding—like certain European royal families practiced—tends to be what gets you in trouble. Also can happen in isolated populations, poorly thought through animal husbandry or plant breeding. One random cousin marriage not usually a huge risk.

… but then I look at Rudy and think: still dunno this is a good idea.

Sarah Ennals's avatar

I'd also argue that people who point to isolated hillbilly clans as the result of inbreeding need to also consider the contributing effects of poverty; lack of regional hospitals; and iodine deficiency in the diets of landlocked areas.

Bear: PROTECT THE AMERICUB's avatar

Sadly, because of the way systolic and diastolic work, Roodles' blood pressure can never drop to 9 / 11.

Friend's avatar

Hah! 6 / 7 Now I get it!

Rhand Holm's avatar

Someone should look after Rudy's comfort. Hospitals are such distressing places with none of the comforts of home. Some good Samaritan should bring him a few bottles of whisky and a box of cigars.

AJ Milne's avatar

Thoughts and prayers.

(… note not specifying details of what either are in this case.)

Fifth Dentist's avatar

He's got to be correct.

Severe alcoholics in their 80s never get sick or have serious health issues. It's just science.

GiggleSnort's avatar

I will always remember him at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, with the hair dye running down his face. That's surely got to be some kind of nadir for him.

OneYieldRegular's avatar

I still have my Four Seasons Total Landscaping t-shirt, which I am saving for the right moment.

Our_Man_In_Redneckistan's avatar

The new low is that the porno shop next door was running a dildo madness sale.

I laughed so fucking hard I hurt myself.

Russell Jones's avatar

lol

I suppose dildo madness is among the better sorts of madness.

Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Rootie is a mad dildo, if they came in al dente.

AJ Milne's avatar

Is a half off dildo sale a Lorena Bobbitt sale?

Chemical's avatar

True story: The Four Seasons Total Landscaping event happened on my 40th birthday. To this day I consider it a birthday gift.

Pauly2coffees's avatar

The delicate medical procedure of removing Rudy’s hand from his khram.