249 Comments
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The Lichtenbergian's avatar

Carlson's mug on the Great A'Tuin? This borders on blasphemy, sirrahs. The small gods are displeased.

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kasteel1's avatar

Love your graphic--reminded me to watch Hogfather again---it's that time of year. Merry Hogswatch, everyone!

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Sherry's avatar

George Santos show you say? How about this? Claims he will never be on DWTS but I don’t believe him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjbkafIMdl8

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DemoCat's avatar

I’m open to the possibility that the Earth and Tucker’s head are both flat.

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DemoCat's avatar

Everything Tucker does is to compensate for being humiliated by Jon Stewart in 2004, just as everything Trump does is to compensate for his unfortunate existence and being humiliated by Obama in 2011.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Fuck Tucker Carlson.

It is amazing how often that works.

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Edgar Allen Shmoe's avatar

Gosh, I wonder what other lies they told me in school. Next you’re gonna tell me the first thanksgiving wasn’t a bunch of happy pilgrims eating turkey around a big table with friendly and subservient aboriginal North Americans!

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Khavrinen's avatar

Hasn't Tucker heard of Christopher Columbus?

( "It's round as your hat!" "It's flat as your head!" )

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3hzDJiVfJo

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John Thorstensen's avatar

I do love the graphic, though Mitch McConnell of course is more turtle-like.

There's a great picture of a lunar eclipse, showing the moon with a thin band of shadow across it, and beneath it the shadow of a giant turtle bearing four elephants on its back. This is clear and incontrovertible evidence that the earth is actually flat and held up by turtle power. It couldn't possibly have been faked, though I confess it doesn't look like any lunar eclipse I've witnessed personally.

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Spleen Victoria's avatar

I suggest we begin calling Tucker “Bloody Stupid Carlson”.

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Mark Linimon's avatar

Tucker "Your Fifteen Minutes Are Up" Carlson.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I'm still partial to "Tuckums."

h/t Joy Reid.

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martin.english@gmail.com's avatar

This is Discworld slander ...

No way the Great A'tuin looks as ugly as that image.

FWIW, the four elephants are named Berilia, Tubul, Great T'Phon, and Jerakeen.

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Hans Cox's avatar

Omg lol too good!

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The_Shadout_Mapes's avatar

His star faded so fast that now he’ll entertain anything to try and win back the adoration of smooth-brained masses.

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Revenant's avatar

And Tuckums demonstrates a very convincing reason for ignoring him forever after, as if his whole career has not been sufficient evidence. What did we ever do for grade A bullshit before Fox provided us with access to inexhaustible mines of the stuff like Bow-Tie Bonzo? Thanks, Rupert, for providing severe mental handicaps to the susceptible.

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

I never understood the argument of “the climate has changed in the past, therefore, it couldn’t be changing as the result of human activities now.”

What do they think caused climate change in the past? Magic? Jesus? The Earth’s climate has always operated under the same principles. And one of the big factors that drove climate change in the past has been the composition of the atmosphere. Volcanoes release carbon dioxide, among other gases. So when there’s been an increase in volcanic activity, the amount of CO2 in the atmosphere increases and this results in an increase in global temperatures. Eventually, a lot of this CO2 gets captured through processes like photosynthesis and some of that carbon gets sequestered into the Earth’s crust. And the Earth cools.

The only difference now is that we’re returning carbon to the atmosphere at a faster rate. It would take volcanoes thousands of years to release what we’ve pumped into the atmosphere in just a century. So all the change is happening at an accelerated pace.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

Do not get me started on this. Please.

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Revenant's avatar

they don't know and refuse to learn the causes of major climate changes in the past, so as to be able to refute the arguments of scientists with a succinct but heart-felt "nuh-uh!" Remember when the knuckleheads were asking the question, "Well, you think you're so smart, where was Covid 18?" and believing that was a knock down argument.

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Furiouser and Furiouser's avatar

Some of us already knew history doesn’t move in a straight line. Like, some people weren’t allowed to vote in the Jim Crow era, then after the Civil and Voting Rights Acts they could sometimes vote, and now they can vote only if the state remembers to put a polling place in their area and they have photo id. Seems like there are other rights some of us used to have that we don’t anymore.

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Ellen_D's avatar

"As for as the curvature of the Earth, that’s a thing in shooting. I like rifle shooting and past a certain distance you have to take that in account."

I'm calling bullshit on this.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

If you're shooting a long-range naval gun, you have to take the coriolis acceleration into account, which is a consequence of the earth's rotation*, but for rifle bullets? The range is so short, relatively, that the curvature of the earth makes no difference.

* Coriolis acceleration is the apparent acceleration of an object relative to a rotating reference frame, such as the earth; in reality, the reference frame is accelerating 'under' the object. Acceleration here doesn't mean speeding up, but any change in velocity; it manifests primarily as a sideways deflection in this case. Goldstein, "Classical Mechanics", 1950, section 4.9.

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Anarchy Pony's avatar

Coriolis effect is absolutely a factor in long range precision shooting.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

Makes sense, but I can't believe the curvature of the earth makes any difference -- it's folded into the drop.

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Pexas Teat's avatar

Yeah, I think Tucker is confusing Coriolis with Earth's curvature.

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Anarchy Pony's avatar

Latitude.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

That's true -- the coriolis effect is a function of latitude, and obviously depends on the sphericity of the earth. The flat-earth nuts I encounter online seem to think that the curvature isn't there at all -- they show poorly-sourced images of things that should supposedly be over the horizon, protest that airplanes would have to nose-down all the time to "follow the curve", and so on.

They are, as Gene Wilder put it, pretty much, people of the land, the common clay of the new west --- you know ---- morons.

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defpac's avatar

Talking crazy assholes. Someone tricked Alex Jones into a podcast session with a Parkland parent.

Supposedly it was a hell of a ride for Jones. Link to the video below.

https://twitter.com/ChudsOfTikTok/status/1736790760715170123

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

Did the parent get to punch him in his bloated tick of a face?

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