Up With Wonkette's Top Ten Stories Of The Week!

Come read them now!

Hello! And happy weekend to you all!

This week, I have a very exciting gift for you all. It is a clip of "Up With People" singing their Up With People theme song. I don't know much about them except for how they were maybe a cult and I had a friend audition to join well after it was a thing and she got all mad at me because I said I thought it was maybe a cult. Which I guess was fair because I had previously taken an actor's studio class that was in fact a sex cult, although I didn't find out until way later because no one invited me.

OH. And Glenn Close was in it. "Up With People," I mean, not the weird western NY sex cult that thought they were too good for me.

Up with People - Up with People 1991    www.youtube.com 

Hope you enjoyed that, whatever it was! It was certainly perky.

And here are your top ten stories of the week!

10. My Pillow Guy Just Gonna Sue All Of The Machines, Okay? All Of Them. Stupid Machines. 

9. Wonkette Weekend Live Chat Follows The Road Not Taken 

8. Trucker Convoys Yet To Decide Whether To Sh*t Or Go Blind 

7. Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Drink, The Molotov! 

6. Which To Burn First, The Confederate Flag Or This Ginormous Blunt? 

5. Totally Trustworthy Russia Detains WNBA Star Brittney Griner On Totally Legit Drug Charges 

4. Human Participation Trophy Madison Cawthorn Calls Zelenskyy A 'Thug.' That's It, That's The Headline. 

3. Roger Stone Let Danish Film Crew Record Him Plotting 1/6 Coup And You Are A Dirty Crimer For Noticing! 

2. Texas Idiot F*cks Around (Goes To Trial On Jan. 6 Charges), Finds Out (He's Going To Prison) 

1. What Are Seven Percent Of Americans Doing Believing In Werewolves? 

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