18 Comments
User's avatar
Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

For people who apparently have an entire Deity in their back pockets, they sure require a lot of constant reaffirmation about this subject, don't they?

bobbert's avatar

Actually, the Urim and Thummim disapparated even before the translation was complete, leading to Joe completing the work by staring into his hat. (True story)

bobbert's avatar

"Pistol-grip pump" would work,also, too.

fuflans's avatar

i just saw that and was going to ask WTF???

that's some southern gothic right there.

fuflans's avatar

it would be better is mitt was talking about 'children of men'.

PubOption's avatar

Certainly not the Dutch Reformed Church in South Africa.

PubOption's avatar

Render unto the Cayman Islands that which is Caesar's.

PubOption's avatar

I have not heard that track in a long time.

diogenez's avatar

As told by a shiny Gold Plate. From the hills of New York. Buried in a stone box. Translated from their original "reformed Egyptian" language. Or a box of Chablis. I forget which.

MonkeyMotion's avatar

Oh fer fucks sake, can't all these goddamn religious shits just lock themselves up in a church somewhere, pray to their stupid gods alone, AND LEAVE THE REST OF US IN PEACE?

(Sorry, no mood for snark.)

Bourgeois Nerd's avatar

Being a heathen sodomite, I feel we're overlooking the important thing in this post: that Jesus in the picture is really, really hot. "Our Father" indeed!

Lot_49's avatar

As Sally learned early in life, it's not who you know, it's who you blow.

Lot_49's avatar

Yep, that's right, in the time of Jefferson and Adams the word "God" had not yet been discovered, so in their ignorance the founding daddies called him the "Creator." It most certainly WAS NOT because those Deists knew the word "God" but chose to make the Declaration a secular document. And that's why they didn't put "In God We Trust" on coins until 1954. "Creator" just wouldn't fit on the dime.

JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

Wait 'til Jeebus comes back and the world lives by His rules. Help the poor!? The Xtians will think they're in Hell.

PsycWench's avatar

<i>Part of claiming your citizenship is claiming a belief in God, even if you are not Christian</i> Fucking come here and make me, then. The entire PsycWench household is atheist and no one has refused our tax money yet.

JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

<i>An atheist could never get elected dog catcher, much less president.</i>

Holy fuck! I haven't been voting in the dog catcher election.

The Repubicans have added a strict voter ID requirement for dog catcher voting. "To stop fraud," they said.

Santorum for Dog Catcher 2016!