We Regret To Inform You Of Newest Biggest Problem In The World: Subway Turnstile Jumpers

Shut up, it's a very serious issue!

Washington DC has its share of troubles right now, as its downtown core struggles to recover from the pandemic. The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority is also facing an operating shortfall of $185 million in its upcoming budget. Fare evasion is blamed for an estimated loss of $40 million each year. This is a significant loss in potential revenue, yes, but it’s also worth noting that WMATA ridership has steeply declined since the pandemic. Last year, rail ridership was just “32 percent of March 2019 pre-pandemic levels on weekdays, with higher rates on weekends. Bus ridership was 65 percent of pre-pandemic levels on weekdays, and nearly 90 percent of Sunday levels.”

This isn’t directly related to perceived safety so much as people working more consistently at home. That is probably a bigger structural issue but fare evasion is an easy quick fix. We don’t mean to minimize even petty crime — or, considering Walgreens has admitted its sob story about organized shoplifting putting it out of business in minority areas is bullshit, maybe we do! — but if the trains are almost empty, how much are fare evaders really cutting into revenue or making the travel experience less pleasant? It’s not like paying riders are fighting for a seat with freeloaders. (WMATA is still considering raising fares for their ghost trains.)

The WMATA announced a crackdown on fare evaders last year. In Virginia and Maryland, fare evasion citations are about $100, while DC’s citations, which are civil offenses, are $50. DC law, however, gives evaders the option to pay for the ride or leave the station.

This all started in January, but as American Conservative Senior Editor Helen Andrews points out, people are still ducking fares in a lawless DC. She knows this because she conducted a spontaneous and highly scientific study while bored one day.

“Two white fare jumpers were observed all day, about 2 percent of fare jumpers, but I don’t have a racial breakdown of the overall sample so I can’t say how far out of proportion that is compared to total riders.”

— Helen Andrews (@Helen Andrews) 1673480790 

She tweeted on January 12: “Today I decided to wait an extra five minutes outside the gates when I took the Metro and see how many fare jumpers I could count. I did this four times at stops on the Red and Yellow/Green lines.

"Average number of fare jumpers spotted in five minutes was 22.”

But how many of them were white? Fortunately, Andrews just happened to casually notice.

“Two white fare jumpers were observed all day, about 2 percent of fare jumpers, but I don’t have a racial breakdown of the overall sample so I can’t say how far out of proportion that is compared to total riders.”

Tuesday, she had an UPDATE:  

“Update: Nearly 40 fare jumpers in five minutes this morning. I asked the Metro attendant if he cared about people stealing. He said, verbatim, “That’s not my job.””

— Helen Andrews (@Helen Andrews) 1674566469 

"Nearly 40 fare jumpers in five minutes this morning," she wrote . "I asked the Metro attendant if he cared about people stealing. He said, verbatim, 'That’s not my job.'”

The gentleman was correct. This is literally not his job. He's not the police. 

When I worked concessions at a Broadway theatre in the mid-'90s, a somewhat jaded usher told me that years prior, her coworker had tried to stop someone who was peeing on the the side of the building. The public urinator pulled out a knife while still holding onto himself and stuck it in between the guy's ribs. "That's why I don't stick my neck out for nobody on this job," she said, unintentionally quoting   Casablanca . My Broadway Bogie was right, though. Never come between a public urinator and the wall: You'll either get soaked or stabbed. (I realize that's the exact opposite moral lesson from Spider-Man's origin, but I don't have spider powers.)

There is of course a simple solution to the bitter social scourge of turnstile jumping, and it dovetails beautifully with the aims of cleaning our air and degridlocking our streets, and we bet the clever reader can guess what it is. For the non-clever among you, it's make the damn public transportation free.

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