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Matthew Hooper's avatar

Stuck in traffic 7 miles out of Columbus. Could use a Mai Tai. Questions go here.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

If we're 𝘒𝘀𝘡𝘢𝘒𝘭𝘭𝘺 in the 21st century FUTURE, there should be drone service.

Bar service, table service, drone service. And personal jetpacks...

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

β€œand that was how our family fortune was made, young master Shock. Using a combination of sophisticated predictive software and hacked order lists from Uber Eats, when people are stuck in traffic jams, a drone pulls up to their window with their favorite fast food order. They have 10 seconds to make a decision before it flies away. Such convenience delivery comes at a premium cost, of course.

Fast food? What is it? Oh, we would never feed you such, not good for the body, young Shock, best that you never try it.”

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Shocktreatment's avatar

As it's the goddam 𝘍𝘢𝘡𝘢𝘳𝘦 and the goddam car is driving itself, I am going to have a cocktail. A healthy, salubrious, generously poured cocktail. Maybe two, I hate traffic jams...

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

Or, since it’s the future, and we have all been converted to the singularity, we don’t have to go anywhere in our cars are driving themselves, so you could offer the car an oil change. Assuming they still have engines…

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EmmaBrooks's avatar

umda tere

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EmmaBrooks's avatar

umda tere

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

I’m trying to pick paint color for my garage. Farrow and Ball pavilion blue or pale powder are the current front runners. What are your thoughts?

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Stranger Than Friction's avatar

What a difficult choice! Because you mentioned the light coming in through trees, or just the light, I think the F&B pale powder is a lovely pale greenish color that could work well. I looked at it in a bedroom and a kitchen in photos on line, which is difficult for accuracy. Did you get the peel and stick paint samples of each to post in various places of your garage? I've also heard of folks buying samples and using them to paint material that is similar to the walls or at least is a smooth neutral board or poster board to put a larger sample up near windows and such in the space. Then you could see it with the benches and other "furniture" you'll have in the room. I hope you post photos of the finished room!

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

I ordered paint samples, but my painting supplies are in a tote on the outside of the garage in a large pile of random stuff, which I haven’t been able to locate yet. Hopefully today.

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Matthew Hooper's avatar

Interior or exterior of the garage?

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

Interior. Exterior is a combination of cedar siding and forest green T-111.

Ceiling is going to be white, so it’s just the walls. I want something subtle enough for the view and the sunlight to be the focal feature of the design, and a color that will pull in the green of the trees instead of fighting with it, but not too icy cool, because winter.

https://substack.com/profile/1687878-1d57a1d5931d/note/c-157994518?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=106di

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Matthew Hooper's avatar

And here I was going to suggest truck bed liner…

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π•Ίπ–“π–™π–π–Šπ–”π–™π–π–Šπ–—π–π–†π–“π–‰'s avatar

Most of my Internet searches suggest something similar, or the really daring ones suggest gray and red, with full size framed pictures of a Maserati on the wall.

Windows are going to be trimmed out with Hemlock.

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RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

the pavilion blue is quite nice.

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Terri Ring's avatar

Where can one find orange blossom water?

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Matthew Hooper's avatar

Your local Indian or Asian grocer.

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Mole Child of Cluelessness's avatar

I've been using a trick lately of putting an obscure item into Instacart and it'll show what places locally ( that use instacart ) have it. For me it's Asian Family Market, Zupans and Barbur World Foods. So I'd check Asian and probably middle eastern groceries

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Nancy Naive's avatar

You guessed it, Whole Foods. There is also a chain called World Mart that carries it.

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Terri Ring's avatar

I wonder if HMart would carry it? I’ll check.

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pskbh's avatar

Tenderly I say, Whole Paycheck is Amazon. If you have a local grocer or good bar, buy from them.

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MorganX's avatar

I want throw a Wonkluau next summer in Oberlin, you want a small gig and invite? We'll pitch in for your fee 🍍

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Lady Tavestock's avatar

I'm in, MorganX.

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CocoRuckus's avatar

An Oberlinian Wonkluau sounds fantastic! You know what I miss most about that place? The Feve’s tater tots. and Art Rental.

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MorganX's avatar

Not Lorenzo's pizza?!

Did you know Ginko closed? Where will we go for kitten-socializing fix, now?

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Matthew Hooper's avatar

Yes. Sooner you can give me dates and a budget, the better. I’m in. :)

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MorganX's avatar

Arrrgghhh!

Have a great vacation, Hooper πŸ΄β€β˜ οΈ

Woot! We should have fun, I do like to throw a good party :-)

I figured I'd buy recommended supplies, you could tell me how/make up some pitchers, and I can refresh them if needed, but what do I know! YES, I do love fresh juices, of course πŸ₯­ πŸ‹ πŸ₯₯

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tehbaddr's avatar

Does it have to be served in a mid century cartoon cat style tumbler?

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Matthew Hooper's avatar

Yes. Sorry, that’s the rules.

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Molesworth One and a Half's avatar

Feel your pain. Used to live in Columbus and the traffic/continual construction on my route to work sucked.

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Thatsit Fortheotherwon's avatar

I used to live in England. Mind the sheep!

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Gammarae's avatar

sounds like the beginning of a decent horror story.

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Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

If it were still going on, I would enter the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest with:

Turned out to be a Dark and Stormy night; I was stuck in traffic 7 miles out of Columbus; could use a Mai Tai, but the only mixer I had was ginger beer...

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displacedCTYankee's avatar

... the lawyers were all disbarred, the guns had trigger locks, and the money was counterfeit.

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Marty Smit's avatar

Or a Hunter S Thompson travelogue.

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Stanta Knows's avatar

I was 7 miles out of Columbus when the ether kicked in.

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ciaobella's avatar

Nothing, just Hooper driving to Columbus (by the scenic route)

https://youtu.be/LjLip2FZLuA?feature=shared

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Tetman Callis's avatar

Well, it could be worse. You could be stuck inside of Mobile.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3kh6K_-a0c4

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Left Coast Tom's avatar

Lodi has wine, at least.

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Gammarae's avatar

wine, or "wine"?

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bobbert's avatar

These days, WINE.

Not so much so back when the song was written

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irish379's avatar

With the Memphis Blues Again

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TheHeroOfCanton's avatar

'Immoble in Mobile'. That's gold, Jerry! Gold!

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Free beach's avatar

Ovaltine!

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NaturePaul's avatar

My music apropos

https://youtu.be/rCPQPwVWbSU

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ciaobella's avatar

Here’s a little tune to hum while stuck in traffic

https://youtu.be/XqZsoesa55w?feature=shared

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bobbert's avatar

Possibly the best part of Umbrella Academy

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wavicles's avatar

You... are a fucking monster!

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RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

Every time I see someone open up their iPhone I shout, "hey Siri! Play Baby Shark, Volume 10!"

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ciaobella's avatar

What? Maybe he’s got kiddos in the car!

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In Crom We Trust's avatar

Post

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Void's avatar

On the upcoming Charlie Kirk day we should celebrate as he would wish. By showing support for mocking orange fat tits and supporting LGBTQ+!

And guns!

Just go fucking wild as he would have desired

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Void's avatar

And how dare an employer ask anyone to work on Kirkmas

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Void's avatar

Our walking corpse of a president is just so goddamn tiring

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Prometheus59650's avatar

Hey, Dearborn. How's things?

***

The Trump administration has set its eyes on a new target: Palestinians, who under a new directive will now be subject to heightened scrutiny when applying for asylum, according to leaked documents obtained by the Washington Post.

The outlet obtained an internal email from the Department of Homeland Security that advised staff within the agency’s asylum office to β€œbe on the lookout for Palestinian cases,” regardless of whether applicants actually reside in Palestine, so long as they β€œotherwise affirmatively [identify] as Palestinian.” Those cases would then be β€œdiverted for an additional review to the quality-assurance office,” the Washington Post found and reported on Saturday.

Lawyers who spoke with the Washington Post said the new directive was unprecedented, particularly given its broad application to an entire ethnic group.

β€œAs a lawyer and a former asylum officer, I have never seen this applied to a nationality or a people group in this manner,” said Brian Manning, founder of Political Asylum Lawyers and a former asylum officer, speaking with the Washington Post. β€œIt’s a big deal because this has never happened before for a specific identity group or nationality.”

The Homeland Security email reviewed by the Washington Post was dated Aug. 14, which would coincide with State Department’s halting of all Visas for people from Gaza, a move announced through social media, and after pressure from a highly-influential right-wing influencer.

The influencer was Laura Loomer, who wields a β€œbreathtaking influence” over the Trump administration, despite not holding any form of public office. Loomer, a self-described β€œproud Islamophobe,” raged online after learning that a nonprofit organization was assisting injured Gazans visit the United States to seek emergency medical care.

β€œWhy are any Islamic invaders coming into the US under the Trump admin?” she wrote in a social media post on X on Aug. 15. Just hours after Loomer’s posts criticizing the State Department, the agency announced its pausing of all Visas for Gazans, an announcement that led to Loomer taking credit for having β€œsaved so many American citizens from being killed by pro-Hamas jihadis."

Now, with all Palestinians seeking asylum being subject to additional review by the State Department, immigration lawyers are crying foul.

β€œ[A] blanket policy on sending anyone who is ethnically Palestinian to a quality assurance offices appears to be another attack on Palestinian identity and voices,” said Marty Rosenbluth, a Georgia-based immigration lawyer, speaking with the Washington Post.

Ban Al-Wardi, another immigration lawyer based in California, said that β€œat minimum,” the new directive would impose additional delays for Palestinians seeking escape from Israel’s ongoing siege on Gaza, which has killed a minimum of 65,000 Palestinians, the vast majority of them women and children, though some estimates have put the death toll as high as 680,000, such as one recent study from Australian academics Richard Hil and Gideon Polya.

β€œIf DHS is sending all asylum cases of Palestinians for further processing, solely based on their identity, then this is disparate treatment,” Al-Wardi said. β€œWe don’t know what the directive means yet but at the minimum it will mean more delays for Palestinian asylum seekers.”

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marcus816's avatar

I think I’ve mentioned that a Mai Tai was my first real cocktail when I first got to Hawaii at the age of 18 (legal then). This is going to be fun to make! I have a couple of ideas…

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Yo charlie apologists and lobbyists for charlie 'sainthood'! In the spirit of me being helpful i got a hot one for you!

If you need a sculptor for your planned memorial shrine have I got a name for you! Check out Jack Kershaw! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Kershaw

Not just any old conspiracy theorist, racist piece o trash shithead segregationist but also a renowned sculptor of Iconic shithead racist KKK heroes! The whole package in one place! Have a peek at his work! https://emergingcivilwar.com/2020/09/22/a-statue-that-really-ought-to-go/

RACIST! CONSPIRACY THEORY FACTOTUM! KKK! TOTAL SICKO! "ARTIST'! This guy is the total package that charlie would definitely approve of.

ooops! He's dead! What can I say about a sculptor who loves him some KKK leader memorial sculpting and is now dead? Plenty!

Wotta loser! Wotta QUITTER! He let down the white supremacists and their cause because he was too weak and feeble to carry on! Good riddance to bad rubbish for both him and his work products! Fuck off Jack Kershaw!

BTW- did you notice I didn't say a bad thing about charlie?

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

"I am totally exhausted with all these conspiracy theories!" is something I have never said.

I also look forward to the coming shrines, and memorial statues and graffiti lionizing a certain "fallen martyr".

That's because for every one of those gaslighting POS shrines and statues and graffiti there are also pots of paint, stencils, wheat paste posters, sledge hammers and the unrelenting will to use those things as tools of free speech. Any fence or security barrier erected around such things is an unconstitutional inhibition to Sacred Free Speech! (Also too, an admission that they know their propaganda is unpopular.)

"Ain't no vandals around here your honor! All I see is advocates for the first amendment right to tell people to fuck off with obvious insults to their intelligence! "

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Saviour of Bread's avatar

Afternoon spuggers, all well? It was the Eskmuthe regatta today which was looking iffy due to the weather. The first couple of races went off but then it was cancelled due to building seas.

Fair enough, so we rowed the couple of miles home in it. A lot of fun as we had a good cox and a strong experienced crew.

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Queen MΓ©abh's avatar

Oh, dear, I've got a female inmate I've been trying to advocate for for a long time, and she very obviously has serious mental health issues that are not, and will never be, addressed in prison. At least ONE of her many problems is Bipolar Disorder - I don't hear from her for months and then I start getting 10 emails every day with irrational demands - but she also has serious paranoia. Now she wants me to accept her Power of Attorney and adopt her as my daughter and get her sent to a mental hospital and tell the warden and the BBB (why the BBB?) that aliens spirits are possessing her, and I really can't do any of that or get her any help. How many people like this are out there in the world, not getting treatment? I suspect there are far more than we have any idea. IS there any treatment that works? I have my doubts about that. It's all very sad and depressing.

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Susanneh's avatar

I work with a few people on the outside with this level of mental illness and it's very difficult to 1. Get the help for them they need and 2. To get the person to accept the help, no matter the trusting relationship that existed when they are lucid. I can't imagine your struggle and I appreciate your willingness to help however you can. That's some good work.

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Queen MΓ©abh's avatar

If I am totally honest, trying to help these women makes me feel slightly better about my own life, which was definitely not my original goal. Plus sometimes I actually get to HELP them...not often, but sometimes. Sometimes all they really need is someone non-judgemental to talk to. I think it's a new experience for some of them.

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Susanneh's avatar

I relate to wanting to be of use, and even more to the support and acceptance with out judgement. I may not be the most skilled clinician out there, but I care deeply about every person I work with and people respond to that.

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EyeQueue's avatar

There are meds they can be given but some people refuse the meds because they like the feeling of power, etc. they get from the manic phase of the bipolar disorder.

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Queen MΓ©abh's avatar

One of my first cousins suffered from Bipolar Disorder for 45 years, and he tried one treatment after another. None of them really worked. He developed this illness when he was in college, and then he went on to get married and have 3 children, 2 of whom also suffered from Bipolar. It was a real tragedy. His wife was a fucking SAINT!

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Birb-General of the US's avatar

It's tough on patients and those who care for them.

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Schmannity's avatar

Where's that discharge petition to cut through this gaslighting shit? Kirk called for the release of the entire file. Honor him!

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Birb-General of the US's avatar

Caturday post. Clementina 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 her new box spring for her bed...

https://substack.com/@birbgeneral/note/c-158023729?r=1sycmt

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Queen MΓ©abh's avatar

Clementina is very beautiful.

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Queen MΓ©abh's avatar

Now I want meatloaf for supper.

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Lady Tavestock's avatar

I too am dressed like a pirate for the Port Deposit Pirate Takeover! All for a good cause. ❀️

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Speaking of a Kirk....make mine Rahsaan Roland!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9nkW3VXrzWM

BTW- the trumpet was Rahsaan's first instrument and he kept playing it after he fitted one with a reed. That album also has his rendition of *Bye-Bye, Blackbird* done on a reed fitted trumpet.

BTW #2- That band he is playing with is aka *Stuff* who, when they weren't doing their own thing as *Stuff*, were making the rent as hotshit studio musicians with union cards.

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Assigned Cute at Birth's avatar

Not voting for anyone who voted to honor that nazi, Kirk.

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