Cucumbers hate all humans, they thought that their bland flavor would make them unappetizing to humans, but it turns out that just like spicy peppers, we're into that shit.
A question, solely to satisfy my curiosity because I pretty much don't do hard liquor (I tell people I quit hard liquor when I stopped teething; my mother rubbed scotch on my gums to soothe the pain). Have you ever tried a lemon cucumber in any of your concoctions?
Maybe it's a California thing; I used lemon cucumbers in salads when I was working for a caterer back in the 1960's in CA. Yellow, mild, sweet (but not cloying). I haven't seen them on the east coast ever.
Thanks for this one Matthew, will definitely make this one to the letter, sounds great. And I'm on board with your assessment of Hendrick's, almost all are fantastic, but there was one floral limited edition that was a sad mistake.
Okay, I was LITERALLY about to say that I thought gimlets were made with vodka and that I cannot drink gin because I got violently, and I mean violently, ill on it on high school. And all I can say is that I am really glad I actually read the article before stupidly posting that, even though that is exactly what I am doing now.
Well, personally I cannot drink, as my body is shit at metabolizing alcohol. So my limit is a very occasional mimosa at brunch. BUT - if I could, I would say that sounds delicious.
Two Fingers Tequila. Drank myself sick on it in high school and couldn't drink and to-kill-ya for years! I'm glad to have discovered good tequila since!
Odds are your high school Two Fingers was agave adjacent or "inspired" and was largely straight up ethanol or very cheap rum (little difference). I had a similar high school experience with cheap rum and could not touch rum for many decades. And I remain wary of it, but have learned to appreciate the qualities of rum done well. It is amazing how our (or at least my) memories of bad booze coming back while leaning out of a car door, or hangovers where one can smell the offending cheap booze the next day stick with me/you. But I no longer drink to get drunk and really enjoy the good stuff of all types, mostly. Moderation in all things, including moderation.
We just killed a bottle of Patron Anejo. So old-ass me is familiar with blanco (white) tequila, which is unaged; reposado, which is semi-aged; and anjeo, which is old like me. The young stuff is sharp and spicy and the old stuff is mellow and smooth.
I'm an extremely basic bitch 😂 but I love Patron Anejo. It's delicious in drinks or as a smoothly sipped shot.
We didn't have Hendricks, so we used Beefeaters. I just bought a plain old cucumber, so we used that instead of an English/hothouse cuke. And then we added tonic, so we basically gin and tonic'ed it. Delicious!
Hi--You had mentioned another variation on a gimlet in an earlier column. Involved, I think, Another Hendricks' gin and creme de cacao? I cannot find it anywhere--could you direct me to it?
So the Chicago plankholder franchise football team is moving to Hammond, Indiana... Because the powers that be were unwilling to bribe them sufficiently enough to stay...
There's people here who are upset with this!
They frown and avert their eyes when I say stuff like "from Chicago Bears to the Hammond Who Cares". Hostility is implied after pointing out that these are gazillionaire parasites who have zero experience with professional loyalty getting fat off of a protected monopoly and even the minute portion that reaches the players is enough to make them wealthy mercenaries able to live wherever they want..."
It's big, violent, and very expensive, which makes it American as anything.
I wonder if Hammond knows what they're in for. Like how little of the $100 required just to park your car is going to remain in Hammond and how much is going into the Halas-McCaskey family Treasury...
News flash: sports teams don’t deserve their fan loyalty. The team owners don’t give a damn about the cities (cf. Seattle Sonics, RIP) and the players will move to another team for a better contract in a heartbeat.
Men at Work doing a concert with Toad the Wet Sprocket this August at a farm just down the road from me. 80’s AND 90’s nostalgia bands! Guess I’ll have to get tickets!
About 20 yrs ago, I met one of those dudes, at a Dem rally. Had to be about 6'4", stood straight as an iron rod. When I heard he had "helped liberate France, at Normandy" I threw my arms around him, thanked him, and his wife burst into tears. I told him we would never forget. Our children would never forget. He said it had been "an honor."
We should spend all day making the kind of people who have forgotten what that was about, why that ever became necessary, REMEMBER.
There are probably a very small number of them still living today, sad to think they we will soon lose their living memory, but not their immortal memory.
Is like they go 'for sure congress won't confirm this guy. Let's try, I bet you they will, he's the worst of the worst but they will confirm, they'll confirm a Cat if we want '.
Ok people. I am OUT for the rest of the weekend. Going to Healdsburg for the opening of the group show I got in to and gonna take the rest of the weekend off from the shit show. Take care out there in the world!
If you're tasting wines, try for an appointment at SALVESTRIN WINERY (St. Helena), a wonderful vineyard and wonderful, helpful people. If you get there, please tell Lynn or Shannon Guy recommended you try there, and he sends his best regards. Thanks in advance!
I was thinking about tumbril seating. And I'm pretty confident of my choices for the tumbril first in line:
Stephen Miller: Jewish nazi and the brains behind ICE and immigration.
Russell Vought: Christofascist who is using Federal funding as a weapon to suppress diversity and push "christian" bullshit into everything.
Ka$h Money "Cha-Ching" Patel: Gutting our Federal law enforcement to fill it with nothing but sycophants.
Chuck Schumer: "Gimme the money" ball-less wonder. Is he a traitor? Probably not. But like #MoscowMitch, he is using his position to maintain the money grubbing status quo.
Susie Wiles: Under the radar help mate for all of the above treasonweasels
Chief Justice John Roberts: Liar and prejudiced corruptor of the Supreme Court
Those are my top six for the first tumbril in the parade to prison.
I feel a brunch is in order for this quiet Saturday morning. How about a Dutch baby with blueberries the size of a thumb nail and a drizzle of our neighbors' sugar house maple syrup. And not to be outdone by a drizzle of Andy's syrup; Paul bought maple candy granules (they look like small pebbles of pure gold) that will be liberally sprinkled over the entire thing. AND a couple of links of smoked breakfast sausage from Pekarski's Sausage. Sausage flavored with maple syrup is one of my favorite taste combinations. If you know about Pekarski's, then you know how fabulous these guys are. FYI, they will ship anywhere! And yes, I am one of their biggest fans and will go to the mattresses for them.
Our brunch was vegan maple sausage patties, air fryer home fries, and for the main event, vegan challah French toast with homemade vegan whipped cream. I have leftovers.
I've been mulling over our Sunday brunch plan. It's Monaco race weekend so we'll have fancy brunch. I'm thinking berry stuffed crepes with maple drizzle, mozz/ tomato/ basil omelette and champagne. I think we have pomegranate juice to blend in with the bubbly.
Do you guys get the tiny forest wild strawberries that hide shyly under the leaves and have no fucking equal on this earth, or do the bears get them all?
*was routinely instructed to go out in the foggy dawn in Maine to get berries for Dad to make pancakes, and will never forget the strawberries in particular. Also, low-ground wild blueberries are a pain in the ass to collect.
The yard is full of them but alas....All the critters that come and go out in the yard get all of them. I've managed to harvest about one cup in the 10 years I've been here. We have blueberry bushes that were planted when the cabin was built 42 years ago. I have gotten maybe a handful of those.
Wow!!! That was our #1 snack bar, the woods and dirt roads were packed with allllll the berries. Probably loud kids all summer were enough to get the critters to give us enough space to find enough.
Questions here. I’m consider setting up a GoFundMe to pay my way for Tales of the Cocktail in late July. The stories would be epic. Opinions welcome.
https://talesofthecocktail.org/events/tales-of-the-cocktail-new-orleans/
Sure, a GFM could work, but seriously, NOLA in late July??? Who the hell thought sweating the alcohol out in a swamp-water sauna was a good idea?
It's the off-season. When else are we going to hold a conference?
Not the when, the where - have you experienced NOLA in mid-summer? 🥵
I know, it’s Satan’s armpit. But the whole thing started off as a walking tour/bar crawl of historic New Orleans bars, and it snowballed from there.
I would certainly support the endeavor. Bar stories are among the best stories...
Why not?
I would drink this — if it didn’t have cucumber. Cucumbers hate me, but I do enjoy various gins now and again.
Cucumbers hate all humans, they thought that their bland flavor would make them unappetizing to humans, but it turns out that just like spicy peppers, we're into that shit.
Can I use some Old Mr. Boston Gin and an old stale packet of relish and just call it a day?
Witch Hazel, in a pinch. When the Sterno runs out...
Do you like yourself?
Not much right now, so I take that as a yes!
Why is the alphabet in that order?
Because if it wasn’t it wouldn’t be called the alphabet.
Do it and ask Editrix to keep the linky in the footer. I like your feature. Keeping us toasty.
A question, solely to satisfy my curiosity because I pretty much don't do hard liquor (I tell people I quit hard liquor when I stopped teething; my mother rubbed scotch on my gums to soothe the pain). Have you ever tried a lemon cucumber in any of your concoctions?
I have no idea what a lemon cucumber is.
Maybe it's a California thing; I used lemon cucumbers in salads when I was working for a caterer back in the 1960's in CA. Yellow, mild, sweet (but not cloying). I haven't seen them on the east coast ever.
They are available at our local farmers markets, and they're pretty popular in my family. Pictures and descriptions are available here: https://www.threshseed.com/products/lemon?srsltid=AfmBOoqRrTd8-dzT9734jEbJ9STxjtmHyqb5wyj3cJ7e3-m6FGMZCNq8.
No, they don't taste like lemons, but they are tasty and not bitter.
Yes, set up a GoFundMe because you simply MUST go, and your hotel won't be cheap. We Wonketteers will pony up.
Do it! Please, for the love of Crom, do it!🙇♂️
Thanks for this one Matthew, will definitely make this one to the letter, sounds great. And I'm on board with your assessment of Hendrick's, almost all are fantastic, but there was one floral limited edition that was a sad mistake.
I'd do my best to chip in five bucks but I'll feel a little guilty bc I haven't yet to Wonkette. But I will, soon as I'm properly employed again.
Okay, I was LITERALLY about to say that I thought gimlets were made with vodka and that I cannot drink gin because I got violently, and I mean violently, ill on it on high school. And all I can say is that I am really glad I actually read the article before stupidly posting that, even though that is exactly what I am doing now.
Would you consider drinking some vodka infused with botanicals?
Well, personally I cannot drink, as my body is shit at metabolizing alcohol. So my limit is a very occasional mimosa at brunch. BUT - if I could, I would say that sounds delicious.
Two Fingers Tequila. Drank myself sick on it in high school and couldn't drink and to-kill-ya for years! I'm glad to have discovered good tequila since!
Odds are your high school Two Fingers was agave adjacent or "inspired" and was largely straight up ethanol or very cheap rum (little difference). I had a similar high school experience with cheap rum and could not touch rum for many decades. And I remain wary of it, but have learned to appreciate the qualities of rum done well. It is amazing how our (or at least my) memories of bad booze coming back while leaning out of a car door, or hangovers where one can smell the offending cheap booze the next day stick with me/you. But I no longer drink to get drunk and really enjoy the good stuff of all types, mostly. Moderation in all things, including moderation.
Ditto totally. What's your good tequila? I might try again.
We just killed a bottle of Patron Anejo. So old-ass me is familiar with blanco (white) tequila, which is unaged; reposado, which is semi-aged; and anjeo, which is old like me. The young stuff is sharp and spicy and the old stuff is mellow and smooth.
I'm an extremely basic bitch 😂 but I love Patron Anejo. It's delicious in drinks or as a smoothly sipped shot.
We didn't have Hendricks, so we used Beefeaters. I just bought a plain old cucumber, so we used that instead of an English/hothouse cuke. And then we added tonic, so we basically gin and tonic'ed it. Delicious!
Buying Hendrick's to make it proper next weekend.
YAY! And thank you *so* much!!
*runs to practice*
So is a Gimlet Gimli's child?
Yes!
Hooper, I don’t know if you’ll see this but I have a bottle of Sunspell for you. Tell me how to get it from Boston to you?
Hooper. Happened to be away last week and picked up a Sunspell for you. Any ideas for getting it from the Boston area to you?
Eugene Daniels of MS Now interviews Mayor Zohran Mamdani:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylViq1rWR1g
Hi--You had mentioned another variation on a gimlet in an earlier column. Involved, I think, Another Hendricks' gin and creme de cacao? I cannot find it anywhere--could you direct me to it?
Thanks.
"Never let anyone burst your bubble!"
https://bsky.app/profile/liftforever67.bsky.social/post/3mnmpahxe6c2k
So the Chicago plankholder franchise football team is moving to Hammond, Indiana... Because the powers that be were unwilling to bribe them sufficiently enough to stay...
There's people here who are upset with this!
They frown and avert their eyes when I say stuff like "from Chicago Bears to the Hammond Who Cares". Hostility is implied after pointing out that these are gazillionaire parasites who have zero experience with professional loyalty getting fat off of a protected monopoly and even the minute portion that reaches the players is enough to make them wealthy mercenaries able to live wherever they want..."
It's big, violent, and very expensive, which makes it American as anything.
I wonder if Hammond knows what they're in for. Like how little of the $100 required just to park your car is going to remain in Hammond and how much is going into the Halas-McCaskey family Treasury...
Quickest way to kill loyalty to a team is to make sure only corporate assholes on expense accounts can attend games.
That's why they need the monopoly.
They won't change the name, just like the 49'rs.
Eventually local governments will figure it out.
Maybe before the heat death of the universe. If we're lucky.
News flash: sports teams don’t deserve their fan loyalty. The team owners don’t give a damn about the cities (cf. Seattle Sonics, RIP) and the players will move to another team for a better contract in a heartbeat.
Ball teams are like just so many Gap sweatshirts, wherever they can get the best return will get their business . . .
Men at Work doing a concert with Toad the Wet Sprocket this August at a farm just down the road from me. 80’s AND 90’s nostalgia bands! Guess I’ll have to get tickets!
https://bsky.app/profile/atrupar.com/post/3mnmq7obbpc25
"Hegseth uses his D-Day anniversary speech in Franch to take veiled shots at NATO and European immigration policies"
I listened to this, expecting something that was "veiled". It's not.
Hegseth gives an explicitly racist speech to celebrate D-Day.
"The apogee of American achievement, ladies and gentlemen, a regarded man-baby calling the world stupid." . . .
A reminder that today is the 82nd Anniversary of 𝗗-𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗕𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗡𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗻𝗱𝘆, when Americans and their allies drove back the original MAGAts.
About 20 yrs ago, I met one of those dudes, at a Dem rally. Had to be about 6'4", stood straight as an iron rod. When I heard he had "helped liberate France, at Normandy" I threw my arms around him, thanked him, and his wife burst into tears. I told him we would never forget. Our children would never forget. He said it had been "an honor."
We should spend all day making the kind of people who have forgotten what that was about, why that ever became necessary, REMEMBER.
There are probably a very small number of them still living today, sad to think they we will soon lose their living memory, but not their immortal memory.
Pte. Thomas Cole: "Why is it us? Why us?"
Colour Sergeant Bourne: "Because we're here, lad. Nobody else. Just us."
The OG antifa!!!!
I want a shirt with those guys, ready to land, with the slogan "Anti-fascist, just like our grandparents."
Doofus from Hawaii charged with threatening Big Gretch:
https://www.mlive.com/news/2026/06/hawaii-man-charged-after-threats-to-kill-whitmer-carry-out-state-capitol-shooting.html?
Is like they go 'for sure congress won't confirm this guy. Let's try, I bet you they will, he's the worst of the worst but they will confirm, they'll confirm a Cat if we want '.
"Hooligans, c. 1955"
https://bsky.app/profile/catsofyore.bsky.social/post/3mn3u4upark2v
Ok people. I am OUT for the rest of the weekend. Going to Healdsburg for the opening of the group show I got in to and gonna take the rest of the weekend off from the shit show. Take care out there in the world!
If you're tasting wines, try for an appointment at SALVESTRIN WINERY (St. Helena), a wonderful vineyard and wonderful, helpful people. If you get there, please tell Lynn or Shannon Guy recommended you try there, and he sends his best regards. Thanks in advance!
We didn't make it to St. Helena. We only went for the opening and then home. Thanks for the tip though!
You're welcome. I hope the short trip went well and was enjoyed.
Cheers.
Enjoy your time away!
Bon Voyage!
Amazing, enjoy your event!
Make sure to go wine tasting!
I was thinking about tumbril seating. And I'm pretty confident of my choices for the tumbril first in line:
Stephen Miller: Jewish nazi and the brains behind ICE and immigration.
Russell Vought: Christofascist who is using Federal funding as a weapon to suppress diversity and push "christian" bullshit into everything.
Ka$h Money "Cha-Ching" Patel: Gutting our Federal law enforcement to fill it with nothing but sycophants.
Chuck Schumer: "Gimme the money" ball-less wonder. Is he a traitor? Probably not. But like #MoscowMitch, he is using his position to maintain the money grubbing status quo.
Susie Wiles: Under the radar help mate for all of the above treasonweasels
Chief Justice John Roberts: Liar and prejudiced corruptor of the Supreme Court
Those are my top six for the first tumbril in the parade to prison.
WHAR RFK jr.?
I feel a brunch is in order for this quiet Saturday morning. How about a Dutch baby with blueberries the size of a thumb nail and a drizzle of our neighbors' sugar house maple syrup. And not to be outdone by a drizzle of Andy's syrup; Paul bought maple candy granules (they look like small pebbles of pure gold) that will be liberally sprinkled over the entire thing. AND a couple of links of smoked breakfast sausage from Pekarski's Sausage. Sausage flavored with maple syrup is one of my favorite taste combinations. If you know about Pekarski's, then you know how fabulous these guys are. FYI, they will ship anywhere! And yes, I am one of their biggest fans and will go to the mattresses for them.
https://pekarskis.com/
Our brunch was vegan maple sausage patties, air fryer home fries, and for the main event, vegan challah French toast with homemade vegan whipped cream. I have leftovers.
Do it!!!
I've been mulling over our Sunday brunch plan. It's Monaco race weekend so we'll have fancy brunch. I'm thinking berry stuffed crepes with maple drizzle, mozz/ tomato/ basil omelette and champagne. I think we have pomegranate juice to blend in with the bubbly.
No fancy clothes required, just jammies.
Do you guys get the tiny forest wild strawberries that hide shyly under the leaves and have no fucking equal on this earth, or do the bears get them all?
*was routinely instructed to go out in the foggy dawn in Maine to get berries for Dad to make pancakes, and will never forget the strawberries in particular. Also, low-ground wild blueberries are a pain in the ass to collect.
We find them on our mountain. Right now they're in bloom, so no berries yet.
The yard is full of them but alas....All the critters that come and go out in the yard get all of them. I've managed to harvest about one cup in the 10 years I've been here. We have blueberry bushes that were planted when the cabin was built 42 years ago. I have gotten maybe a handful of those.
Wow!!! That was our #1 snack bar, the woods and dirt roads were packed with allllll the berries. Probably loud kids all summer were enough to get the critters to give us enough space to find enough.
We really don't mind the animals getting to them. HOWEVER! It would be nice to have enough to make just ONE cobbler before I die.
Also: raccoons like kitchen compost, a lot. We didn't mind, of course.