Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, Carajillo de la Muerte!

Viva La Revolution! And coffee. Also tequila.

Now THIS is a proper morning coffee.

Greetings, Wonketeers! I’m Hooper, your bartender. It’s a Wednesday morning, I’ve got a ton of tequila in the liquor cabinet, I’m on a deadline, and I spent last night at my favorite craft bar doing “research.” It’s time to write a coffee cocktail. Quickly. Let’s make a Carajillo de la Muerte. Here’s the recipe.

2 oz hot espresso

1 oz Peloton de la Muerte Tequila

¾ oz Peloton de al Muerte Mezcal

¾ oz Licor 43

2 shakes Chocolate Aztec bitters

Stir all ingredients and pour into a rocks glass. Serve with a lemon twist and cinnamon stick garnish.

9:30 AM: I’ve got an article due in two days. Thankfully, I received a care package yesterday from Peloton de la Muerte, which included some of their fantastic mezcal and a brand-new tequila that hasn’t hit the market yet. The tequila has a firm agave note, but is surprisingly mellow compared to some sharper blanco tequilas in my liquor cabinet. The mezcal is bright and smoky, with no harsh iodine flavors. They’re a perfect pairing, but I’m in no mood for a margarita for breakfast. Can I pair up coffee, tequila, and mezcal? Usually, I’d want a bourbon or Scotch in my coffee; barrel-aged spirits have vanilla and toast notes that sync up with coffee easily. But the smoky notes of mezcal should complement the roasted espresso flavors, and tequila could brighten up the whole thing. Will it work?

10:00 AM: Yes. It will work very, very nicely. Equal parts coffee, tequila, and mezcal tell me we’re on the right path. Adjusting the ratios gets me to a place that’s certainly drinkable. It’s not a cocktail yet; we need some sweetness and complexity in the glass to make it complete. I also need some breakfast quite badly.

10:30 AM: My daughter reminds me we have some leftover bagels. Fortified, I keep dialing the cocktail into place. I’m very cautious about adding a sweet liquor to the drink. Too much sugar, and this will be a dessert cocktail. Licor 43 is fantastic with coffee; the carajillo is one of my favorite coffee cocktails. Can we use just a smidge of Licor 43 to add sweetness and complexity to the glass? Yes. But we still need to deepen the flavor profile.

10:45 AM: Rummaging through the back of my liquor cabinet reveals some Aztec chocolate bitters. Cocoa and spice notes without sugar? Perfect. I should probably shake this and serve it in a coupe. But before that, I need to drink the rest of my coffee and get some real food. Scrambled eggs are a necessity at this point.

1:00 PM: Scrambled eggs, conservas, and chips make for a breakfast brunch of champions. I shake the cocktail, pour it into a cocktail glass … and it’s terrible. The espresso leaps out of the drink, rendering the cocktail undrinkably bitter. It tasted much better warm. A warm tequila cocktail? Is that even a thing? I remake the drink and gently heat it. Yes. Yes, it is indeed a thing. The coffee, agave, and sweet Licor 43 merge wonderfully. A small lemon twist brightens the drink without imparting a citrus taste. It’s a tequila carjillo, and it tastes fantastic. Time to get ready for work.

Let’s talk ingredients:

Ingredient shot. I love the new labels for Peloton; I’m a sucker for pop art style.

Peloton de la Muerte Tequila: I’m very pleased with this new brand from Peloton. I look for intense, up-front agave flavors in my tequila. This bottle delivers, but there’s also a full mouth feel that isn’t as sharp as many hardcore blancos. I’ll be disappointed when this bottle is empty, and I’m confident it will be empty soon.

Espresso: On days like this, I survive on Cafe Bustelo from my moka pot. There’s better homemade espresso. Use that if you’ve got it. But this will do fine. And please, use fresh coffee — bottled is a poor substitute.

Peloton de la Muerte Mezcal: This mezcal has been on the market for a few years now, and it’s our go-to mezcal at Hemingway’s. The rustic smoke notes combine extremely well with Peloton’s tequila, providing depth and character while keeping the agave front and center.

Licor 43: This Spanish vanilla-centric liquor is becoming the ingredient of choice in coffee cocktails. If you like Bailey’s or Frangelico in your coffee at the end of the night, pick up this bottle. You won’t be disappointed.

Aztec Chocolate Bitters: Chocolate and spice notes provide added depth to the drink. Use this sparingly; the heat of the cocktail will make the bitters more intense.

My home bar is Hemingway’s Underground, the hottest cocktail bar in pretty little Medina, Ohio. I’m behind the stick Wednesday-Saturday, 4-10. Last call’s at midnight. Swing on by and I’ll make a drink for you… or anything else from our little Happy Hour here at Wonkette.

OPEN THREAD!