Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Paper Plane!
OMG Hooper's behind the stick at a brand new speakeasy!
Greetings, Wonketeers! I’m Hooper, your bartender. I am hip deep in work right now — we’re taking my new home bar, Hemingway’s Underground, on her shakedown cruise. It’s going to be a ton of work, but I’m surrounded by rock star chefs and bartenders who are dedicated to making this place awesome. I’ve got just enough time to snap some pictures of the new place and make a drink. Let’s have a Paper Plane together. Here’s the recipe.
Paper Plane
¾ oz Sazerac Rye Whiskey
¾ oz lemon juice
¾ oz Aperol
¾ oz Amaro Nonino
Shake all ingredients over ice and strain into a coupe glass. Garnish with the smallest paper plane you can make.
When a cocktail like this comes off the printer, bartenders breathe a sigh of relief. A cocktail with equal measurements means not having to look through the recipe book or rack your brain for the recipe. And this drink chooses its ammunition wisely. It would be easy to balance the lemon juice with simple syrup, but legendary bartender Sam Ross was playing on a different level when he built this drink in 2008. The Aperol is sweet enough to drag this cocktail into balance, providing bitterness and citrus that give the spicy rye whiskey and herbal Amaro Nonio a place to hang their hats. This is genuinely one of my favorite cocktails. It’s complex enough to keep you sipping, but not so bitter or sour that you need a palate cleanser. This is what a cocktail should be.
When I saw this cocktail on the menu of Hemingway’s, I knew I was in a place that loved cocktails. There’s so many good things going on here. We’ve taken every classic you can think of — the Cosmopolitan, the dirty martini, the margarita — and put a little spin on them that makes them better. We’ve got all the diary secrets behind the bar — some Fernet Branca, some Malort, and some shots of Underberg to help finish the night. (Underberg is like Fernet Branca, only more so. It’s A Thing.) Our chef has a killer Italian menu in mind with a few Greek and North African dishes to change up your expectations. Everyone I’m working with is proud of their skills and wants to work as a team to make this place special. I am quite literally giddy with excitement.
It helps that the bar crew is just as talented and dedicated as I am (if not more so). Kiki is an absolute monster behind the bar, shaking up drinks just as fast as me. She loves fall flavors; a pumpkin spice martini is in the works from her. Kalya has decades of experience behind the stick as well; she loves delicate gin flavors. She’s got a Hendrick’s and St. Germain cocktail up her sleeve called “Afternoon Gin” that I adore. Sophia and Melissa don’t have as much craft cocktail experience, but they’re hitting their stride quickly, and I expect them to be putting their own drinks on the menu soon. And the owners, Courtney and Zane, are total cocktail nerds. Courtney is “obsessed,” in her own words, with my Malort cocktail, The Regrettable Tattoo. What that says about her is your call … but expect to see that drink on the menu here soon dear Lord, it’s on the menu tonight!
As you are reading this, we’re cutting the ribbon and opening the joint up. Let’s talk about the ingredients while we’re dusting off the tables:
Sazerac Rye: Sazerac is the house rye whiskey here at Hemingway’s. It is also one of my favorites — spicy like a rye, but still sweet enough to enjoy. I’d suggest Rittenhouse Rye as a substitute; at 100 proof, Rittenhouse pulls no punches.
Aperol: This bitter orange liquor is becoming a favorite of mine — I’ve woven it into several recipes by now. It’s barely sweet and has a citrus note complemented by bergamot and other herbs. Don’t skimp and use a knockoff brand; it can’t compare to the original.
Amaro Nonino: This bittersweet Italian digestif has orange and caramel notes that play right into the Aperol and rye whiskey. I’ve tried substituting other amaros for nonino, and it never works properly. For a proper Paper Plane, nothing else will do.
Lemon Juice: Are you using fresh lemon juice in your cocktail? We are at Hemingway’s. Be like the cool kids at Hemingway’s. Use fresh juice.
Garnish: Make a tiny paper airplane is a bit tricky. I found that folding the ticket from the service well printer makes a paper airplane just big enough to balance on the lip of a coupe glass properly. Feel free to experiment.
Our first day open to the public is WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 27, and I promise I’ll be behind the stick at Hemingway’s Underground, right here in Medina, Ohio. I promise you that I’ll make ANY drink that I’ve written over the years, ingredients willing. Come see me and have a blast!
OPEN THREAD!





Just finished the ribbon cutting. Service in 15. Drink questions here.
My first treasure find in Cleveland! I have a metal detector that I have had for years, couldn’t really use it in NYC. But I checked the rules and found that I could search in the local parks here in Cleveland. I found a spot that I thought would be perfect, people have been walking through that area since the late 1800’s, it had been a park since 1927.
I started in a spot near a path and within in an hour had found a coin. I had no idea what it was till I got it home to clean it, scrapping away dirt with a toothpick. I was THRILLED to see I had found an 1898 Indian Head penny. This is what makes this hobby so much fun. That penny has been in the ground over a hundred years.
This also tells me I am looking in the right spot. With more coins just waiting to be found. https://substack.com/@ziggywiggy/note/c-148110427?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2knfuc