"A farmer in South Africa has been killed by his pet hippopotamus, after repeated warnings that it was a wild animal that could never be tamed.
Marius Els, 40, an army major, was bitten to death by the 1.2 tonne hippo he christened Humphrey and tried to domesticate on a farm in Free State province.
Els's savaged body was found submerged in the river where, years earlier, the hippo had been rescued from a flood. It grew too big for the people who adopted it and was bought by Els at the age of five months, becoming a pet on his 400-acre farm and learning to swim with humans."
Well, that "One Star" story got me to do some thinking.
"Safe" for the passenger, but not necessarily for anyone outside. That's the lack of empathy thing, right there. Why would I worry about a pedestrian? Why be concerned about others? You're safe, that's what's important. Empathy is a negative evolutionary trait. 🤬
And speaking of empathy, it made me realize my own bias - my vacation in London recently and its surveillance-heavy environment and the way I breezed through Customs and Entry had me thinking that maybe this wasn't so horrible after all, that maybe this was something I could live with. And now I see MY OWN lack of empathy in thinking of someone who might have valid reasons for being a "criminal", such as bias in the "justice" system. What if refusing to give your gender identity could get you dragged to the police, which is fucking quite not so unthinkable after the Supreme Court decision on trans people? What if they decide to look at my phone and the audiobook of Marx's "Capital" I downloaded, in light of the Red Scare bullshit that started last week?
Thank you, Wonkette, for bringing these things up. I'm glad I contribute.
It's nothing that anyone else hasn't already said, but of course the pick up artist guy has an ai girlfriend. I have moments where I really feel like I suck, but I'm never going to pretend a cartoon on my phone loves me.
“I mean, think of the wars I settled,” Trump told reporters on Wednesday. “Eight. Wars that were going on for 30 years. Even if you look in the Congo, the Congo versus Rwanda, I settled it after 14 years and about 15 million people had their heads chopped off. I settled that one. I settled eight wars.” [There is no evidence that the conflict between Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo, which has been intermittent since the 1990s, has killed 15 million people, much less that that many were beheaded.]
“But I would say this, I should’ve won that award more than anybody that ever received the Nobel Peace Prize, because nobody’s settled wars. I settled eight of them. Because I’m a certain type of personality, I was able to settle them.”
good grief, that Mystery story--"love isn't limited to bodies", whoaaaaa.
although, if all the incels went out and got themselves an AI girlfriend and had AI sex, at least we wouldn't be burdened by them reproducing. as we know it.
I apparently used my last free Wired article to read that awesome short story by Margaret Killjoy, so I never learned more about that "negging" (?) "pickup artist" (?!) "Mystery" (?!!) having an "AI girlfriend" (??!$1!) named "Shira Always" (?!@1!!ELEVENTYµ₧!!).
This is a great idea. Let's send the foreign jet that did not have nearly enough time to be properly security-retrofitted to American bases. What could go wrong.
Bonnie Tyler has died, she was 75. Born Gaynor Hopkins she eventually took on the stage name to Bonnie Tyler when she was signed by RCA in 1975. Her breakthrough hit was 1977's "It's a Heartache," which went to number one in multiple countries and number 3 on the Billboard Hot 100. This came after Tyler's voice permanently developed a rasp as the result of her frustration with dealing with vocal cord nodule surgery. Her other international smash was 1982's "Total Eclipse of the Heart," written by Meatloaf songwriter Jim Steinman, which reached number 1 in the US and elsewhere.
Here's a bit more obscure Tyler cut, the title track from Mike Oldfield's 1987 album Islands.
NYT: "With its rock-opera bombast bordering on the Wagnerian, the song seemed like a natural fit for Meat Loaf. But “around the time we were recording,” Ms. Tyler later told The Guardian, “Meat Loaf had lost his voice.” So Mr. Steinman gave it to her instead, to use on her 1983 album “Faster Than the Speed of Night,” on which he was a producer. “After it was a hit,” Ms. Tyler recalled, Meat Loaf “always used to say: ‘Dang. That song should have been mine!’”
Ta, Rebecca. Ta, Martini. Sipping delightful flowery green tea while dear husband Meccalopolis makes our fruit bowls. Sleeping late because retired is awesome! It's a beautiful day to forage mushrooms nearby. Good day, beloved Wonketteers. We love and appreciate you all and we bless us all with love, health, peace, and grace.
Please, please stay safe. Wear a mask or two, wash your hands, sanitize when you cannot wash and let the sanitizer dry completely, stop touching your face, take Vitamin D, get a booster shot six months after your last and catch up on any other vaccines you need (and if there are children in your life, make sure they're vaccinated also, too), avoid indoor and crowded outdoor gatherings and when you must meet, remove masks only to eat, drink, and take quick photos, and stay the fuck away from us and anyone with whom you do not share a roof. Do this because you love yourself, and because we love you, too. Do this in memory of 27 Club member Treg and heroic Tony, Holly's pilot friend, among nearly eight million dead worldwide. Do this to honor the nurses and other frontline medical personnel (we adore you, all medicos of Wonkette, active and retired), especially ICU Hera Mrs Land Shark, RN. Stay safe.
Thank you baby Hippos and librarians for being a sliver of light in a pile of very shitty stuff to have to read about.
Also, I feel obliged to say I am sorry about Platner. I was wrong to think he might be like my brother who is prone to peer pressure, but turned out to be a mostly stand up person. He’s more like my other brother… the narcissist with the chameleon ability to get people to see the best in him, while covertly doing all kinds of skeezy shit that is never his fault.
Let’s all hope future elections of great import stop coming down to a choice between 70/80 year olds and rapists.
It’s your hed gif hippo, Bumpy! https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/bumpys-blissful-routine
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/28099232-b212-4efa-a1f8-0101cfabe718?utm_source=share
Bumpy is very Squeeeee.
Our little baby Fiona who was raised at the Cincinnati Zoo is 9 years old now! And she has a 3 year old little brother!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWhWecB3xlQ
Hippo posts are so very hip!
He's so cute. Hard to believe he will grow up to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet.
Hippo hip to scratches and naps!
Bumpy seemed despondent
When he lost his mother's love
But now he's found a life of care
That fits him like a glove.
The world is filled with trouble
A place of strain and strife
But also filled with people
Who honor and keep life.
Babby Hippo walkies!
Somebody's Hungry Hungry!
Awwww. That baby hippo is gonna be a contender.
They're so cute before they become terrifying river killers.
Maybe this little guy won't be. Not many hippos are raised by humans.
That's why they're called river kittehs.
Proving, again, that one must beware of the Cute.
Yes, Bumpy! I love Sheldrick Trust! They have an EXCELLENT IG!
Glad that Bumpy is doing so well after losing his Mom.
Awwwww…poor Bumpy.
If Trump's not aboard, it's just another old passenger jet tarted up to look like a bordello. Even Hugh Hefner would reject it.
"Trump shared a photo Wednesday of what he described as the “newly revamped” West Wing of the White House — and it’s as tacky as you might expect."
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/trump-newly-revamped-west-wing-white-house_n_6a4f73b3e4b0f386cc42d52f?origin=home-latest-news-unit
"Anyone who is supposed to be there doesn’t need the signage. Anyone who needs the signage shouldn’t be there."
Isn't it there because tfg gets lost?
He has way too much time on his little hands.
Looks like a cheap remodel show product only with less taste.
or the entrance to a funeral parlor
"A farmer in South Africa has been killed by his pet hippopotamus, after repeated warnings that it was a wild animal that could never be tamed.
Marius Els, 40, an army major, was bitten to death by the 1.2 tonne hippo he christened Humphrey and tried to domesticate on a farm in Free State province.
Els's savaged body was found submerged in the river where, years earlier, the hippo had been rescued from a flood. It grew too big for the people who adopted it and was bought by Els at the age of five months, becoming a pet on his 400-acre farm and learning to swim with humans."
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2011/nov/14/pet-hippo-humphrey-kills-owner
cautionary tale.
Well, that "One Star" story got me to do some thinking.
"Safe" for the passenger, but not necessarily for anyone outside. That's the lack of empathy thing, right there. Why would I worry about a pedestrian? Why be concerned about others? You're safe, that's what's important. Empathy is a negative evolutionary trait. 🤬
And speaking of empathy, it made me realize my own bias - my vacation in London recently and its surveillance-heavy environment and the way I breezed through Customs and Entry had me thinking that maybe this wasn't so horrible after all, that maybe this was something I could live with. And now I see MY OWN lack of empathy in thinking of someone who might have valid reasons for being a "criminal", such as bias in the "justice" system. What if refusing to give your gender identity could get you dragged to the police, which is fucking quite not so unthinkable after the Supreme Court decision on trans people? What if they decide to look at my phone and the audiobook of Marx's "Capital" I downloaded, in light of the Red Scare bullshit that started last week?
Thank you, Wonkette, for bringing these things up. I'm glad I contribute.
Q for the psych majors out there: why are these baby hippos so fucking cute, even though we know they are going to grow up to be killers?
One theory says that animals whose faces resemble human infants are considered "cute". https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4782005/
It's nothing that anyone else hasn't already said, but of course the pick up artist guy has an ai girlfriend. I have moments where I really feel like I suck, but I'm never going to pretend a cartoon on my phone loves me.
“I mean, think of the wars I settled,” Trump told reporters on Wednesday. “Eight. Wars that were going on for 30 years. Even if you look in the Congo, the Congo versus Rwanda, I settled it after 14 years and about 15 million people had their heads chopped off. I settled that one. I settled eight wars.” [There is no evidence that the conflict between Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo, which has been intermittent since the 1990s, has killed 15 million people, much less that that many were beheaded.]
“But I would say this, I should’ve won that award more than anybody that ever received the Nobel Peace Prize, because nobody’s settled wars. I settled eight of them. Because I’m a certain type of personality, I was able to settle them.”
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/trump-claims-ended-rwanda-congo-war-15-million-people-heads-chopped-off_n_6a4f8124e4b0f386cc42d785?origin=home-latest-news-unit
"I’m a certain type of personality."
The DSM-V agrees.
good grief, that Mystery story--"love isn't limited to bodies", whoaaaaa.
although, if all the incels went out and got themselves an AI girlfriend and had AI sex, at least we wouldn't be burdened by them reproducing. as we know it.
Oh, believe me they have.
yikes
Charlotte Clymer is absolutely-fucking-lutely correct! Excellent column!
GTFO Platner, you’re a fucking piece of shit.
I apparently used my last free Wired article to read that awesome short story by Margaret Killjoy, so I never learned more about that "negging" (?) "pickup artist" (?!) "Mystery" (?!!) having an "AI girlfriend" (??!$1!) named "Shira Always" (?!@1!!ELEVENTYµ₧!!).
Yes. I think that is for the best.
Just remove the cookies for Wired from your browser. That'll usually restart the count.
I remember reading that book in the 90s and being like"whoa. this is the kind of person I'm trying not to be"
And now I'm married, with a great spud, and a job and nice house. Whodathunk.
count your blessings.
"he needed to tour it around some bases"
This is a great idea. Let's send the foreign jet that did not have nearly enough time to be properly security-retrofitted to American bases. What could go wrong.
Wait, is “Mystery” that dude who was in the pickup artist book? Part of that collection of sad, sad men sharing a house in LA?
It’s on my mind because I’ve been listening to the “If Books Could Kill” podcast
Bonnie Tyler has died, she was 75. Born Gaynor Hopkins she eventually took on the stage name to Bonnie Tyler when she was signed by RCA in 1975. Her breakthrough hit was 1977's "It's a Heartache," which went to number one in multiple countries and number 3 on the Billboard Hot 100. This came after Tyler's voice permanently developed a rasp as the result of her frustration with dealing with vocal cord nodule surgery. Her other international smash was 1982's "Total Eclipse of the Heart," written by Meatloaf songwriter Jim Steinman, which reached number 1 in the US and elsewhere.
Here's a bit more obscure Tyler cut, the title track from Mike Oldfield's 1987 album Islands.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9GV3dwKWOE
NYT: "With its rock-opera bombast bordering on the Wagnerian, the song seemed like a natural fit for Meat Loaf. But “around the time we were recording,” Ms. Tyler later told The Guardian, “Meat Loaf had lost his voice.” So Mr. Steinman gave it to her instead, to use on her 1983 album “Faster Than the Speed of Night,” on which he was a producer. “After it was a hit,” Ms. Tyler recalled, Meat Loaf “always used to say: ‘Dang. That song should have been mine!’”
Ta, Rebecca. Ta, Martini. Sipping delightful flowery green tea while dear husband Meccalopolis makes our fruit bowls. Sleeping late because retired is awesome! It's a beautiful day to forage mushrooms nearby. Good day, beloved Wonketteers. We love and appreciate you all and we bless us all with love, health, peace, and grace.
Please, please stay safe. Wear a mask or two, wash your hands, sanitize when you cannot wash and let the sanitizer dry completely, stop touching your face, take Vitamin D, get a booster shot six months after your last and catch up on any other vaccines you need (and if there are children in your life, make sure they're vaccinated also, too), avoid indoor and crowded outdoor gatherings and when you must meet, remove masks only to eat, drink, and take quick photos, and stay the fuck away from us and anyone with whom you do not share a roof. Do this because you love yourself, and because we love you, too. Do this in memory of 27 Club member Treg and heroic Tony, Holly's pilot friend, among nearly eight million dead worldwide. Do this to honor the nurses and other frontline medical personnel (we adore you, all medicos of Wonkette, active and retired), especially ICU Hera Mrs Land Shark, RN. Stay safe.
Slava Ukraini. 🌻🇺🇦💙💛
Mwah! I love you, darling. Have a great day, every Wonk.
Thank you baby Hippos and librarians for being a sliver of light in a pile of very shitty stuff to have to read about.
Also, I feel obliged to say I am sorry about Platner. I was wrong to think he might be like my brother who is prone to peer pressure, but turned out to be a mostly stand up person. He’s more like my other brother… the narcissist with the chameleon ability to get people to see the best in him, while covertly doing all kinds of skeezy shit that is never his fault.
Let’s all hope future elections of great import stop coming down to a choice between 70/80 year olds and rapists.