In a stirring victory for environmental justice, the federal Occupational Safety and Health Administration has slapped Freedom Industries -- the company that leaked toxic coal-washing fluid into West Virginia's Elk River and rendered the water unsafe for over 300,000 people -- with an
...wait a second! 6 years ago I got fined $6000 for a DUI, how in the holiest of fukks is poisoning the water supply for the entire North West portion of W.Virginia earn you an $11,000 fine?!?!?
Me: "Your honor, it is my sincere and deeply held belief that as the CEO of AngryBlakGuy LLC I should be able to drive home from a strip club with a BAC 1 point shy of black out drunk with a open container of Vodka in my lap; because my sky God doesn't specifically prohibit this activity!"
Judge: Sir I deeply apologize for this miscarriage of justice, case dismissed!
...wait a second! 6 years ago I got fined $6000 for a DUI, how in the holiest of fukks is poisoning the water supply for the entire North West portion of W.Virginia earn you an $11,000 fine?!?!?
...good point
Me: "Your honor, it is my sincere and deeply held belief that as the CEO of AngryBlakGuy LLC I should be able to drive home from a strip club with a BAC 1 point shy of black out drunk with a open container of Vodka in my lap; because my sky God doesn't specifically prohibit this activity!"
Judge: Sir I deeply apologize for this miscarriage of justice, case dismissed!