Why Does Ghost Andrew Breitbart Keep Stealing From The Pointer Sisters?

Remember that 1990s teevee show called The X Files, where that one good-looking cable soft-core star solved mysteries with that teensy skeptical ginger who always happened to look the other way when the crazy stuff happened, just like a pro-wrestling ref? And remember that man who smoked all the cigarettes and had all the big secrets and totally had the power to kill that cable soft-core star but never did because in his death that cable soft-core star would only become MORE POWERFUL and a MARTYR?

That cable soft-core star is exactly like Ghost Andrew Breitbart, who is also like Ghost Obi Wan Kenobi in that he always shows up in the minds of heroic young conservatives to tell them to turn off their targeting computers ("facts," "science") and just fire straight ahead hoping to score a one-in-a-million shot with their eyes closed ("BENGHAZI!").

But even Ghost Andrew Breitbart sometimes does wrong. There's a new documentary out, made by conservatives, that is supposed to just be about how good he was at the things he was good at: yelling, sweating, pretending videos that showed one thing actually showed something different.

But the only writer left at what used to be The Village Voice noticed something funny about the movie. (The Village Voice writer wrote in fussy second-person, pretending that *you* are Andrew Breitbart, because YOU WISH):

And maybe [in that documentary] you’ll be filmed puttering around a hotel room, singing “I’m So Excited” by the Pointer Sisters to yourself. And maybe that song won’t be listed in the closing credits because maybe your producers didn’t bother with licensing. And maybe some prick reviewer at some rag someplace will put that fact into some review, knowing that the copyright holders of pop songs search the Internet all day, every day, for any indication that someone someplace might owe them some royalties.

We asked the Village Voice writer if this all really happens in the movie and if Ghost Andrew Breitbart really sings The Pointer Sisters and if BMI really doesn't get its credit at the end.

"Yes," he said. (He sounded sad because "Village Voice.") "He doesn't do anything really crazy like sing 'Happy Birthday,' though, because that shit's expensive."

Ghost Andrew Breitbart, why is there video of you refusing to give black people what is their due? Why are you Reverse Shirley Sherrod?

[ VillageVoice ]