448 Comments

Call it the Kocha Kola bill.

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Voters of Alabama: Richard Shelby is retiring. Please send Doug Jones back to the Senate. Thanks, the other 49 states

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So what are they gonna give Kyrsten?

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I say we change the stan shorthand for these two to "Kyrst-chin", you know, kinda like "Christian for people who no talk so gud", so we can confuse the hell out of Evangelicals.

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Who is Joe Rogan & why should I care?

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BUT WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN!?!?! THEY MIGHT SEE BOOOOOOOOOOOBIES!!!!

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Ah.

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None of that means anything with regard to solving the current problem and if we don't solve the current problem now, we'll ALL be irrelevant by 2024.

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Unfortunately, back in the Thirties wypipo who weren’t racists and/or antisemites were exceedingly rare.

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Yeah, I'd pass on the Barcalounger part. Make them hold the floor on their feet. Older Senators can recruit more spry colleagues and give them notes to riff off.

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Eat a bug, Joe.

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Murkin Rednecks want to live like Russian oligarchs.

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Nurses love me. It's so easy to draw blood, when you can see the veins.

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If there really aren't any rules, I'd just kick the guy in the nuts and walk off. No rules, right?

(Note: I don't actually have any plans to do that, but that's only because a. I'm not an asshole, and b. at risk of explaining the joke, I don't actually believe that there aren't any rules. :p)

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...there's something deeply wrong in a system where a single senator can decide whether millions of people can exercise the most fundamental American right there is.

What's wrong is that half the members of the Senate put party over country. The only reason Manchin is relevant is because the other side is assholes all the way down.

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What's also fucked up is that small red or reddish states have such an outsized amount of power in the Senate. Not one of the better features of our government.

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