36 Comments
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TundraGrifter's avatar

Amd the women purchase their panties in bunches.

Dashboard Buddha's avatar

yes...and their vaginas pre-sanded.

Dashboard Buddha's avatar

This is riotous on several levels:

-He shot himself in the dick with his girlfriend's pink pistol. Freud would have a fucking field day with this.

-Her "gun" should have stayed holstered.

-This should get a Darwin+ award. He won't be able to have kids AND he'll still be around so we can point and laugh at him.

-He shot himself in the dick (this just bears repeating.)

Gosh...but I'm hateful this morning.

102415's avatar

I have no idea why these people should be allowed to have firearms or spend unsupervised time around farm animals.

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

The National Lampoon could have a field day with a conservatard take on "Bored of the Rings". The adventures of Dildo Teabaggins.

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

"you may not be crazy enough for Arizona but rest assured the other 49 states think you are barking mad. "

So he's found a middle ground. That's good, no?

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

You know what would really freak this guy out? The possibililty that our farms could be taken over by giant, soulless corporations, who bleed millions of acres dry, lobby for and pocket billions of tax dollars in subsidies, and then sell honest, loyal Real American™ corn and wheat to the Chinese and the Russians. Wouldn't that be a nightmare?

Mayor_Quimby's avatar

Even with a full cock, I don't think this guy was doing anything with it. I think stupid accidents like this should HAVE to include photos, like mugshots, to deter the stupid. As if that were possible....

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

The One's Ring, with the power to raise taxes, must be carried into FourDoor to be destroyed, with the assistance of a discredited OT VIII Scientologist.

fuflans's avatar

nah. orcs are fast, self sufficient and ruthless.

MissusBarry's avatar

As if anybody else there is familiar with the word "modicum"...they probably thought security was coming to take away their dial up modems.

SheriffRoscoe's avatar

This is your brain on right-wing talk radio.

fuflans's avatar

i think the baggers are more flannery o'connor than tolkien.

but to be fair, that would have been even less understood than hobbits.

Joshua Norton's avatar

Given the brain trust that forms the bulk of the teatards, it seems to be a pretty safe bet to say that there's a day coming - probably sooner than later - that we're going to see tricorn hat clad teabaggers licking wall sockets just to see what electricity tastes like.

In fact, Bachmann looks like she's already done that.