Our Tibetan Terrier boy once grabbed a Thanksgiving apple pie off the dining room table. It was just out of oven. It fell face down on the rug and I found him in there attempting to get the pie plate turned over so he could eat the pie. He did not succeed, but the thing was inedible for humans at this point. I cried.
The Robin Hood of dogs probably got clear and shared that turkey with the other dogs in his neighborhood! (I just wish he had worn his cool little Robin Hood cap while he was doing it.)
My current puppy is a tri-paw with one back leg missing, so he is not a much of a counter pirate, but the black lab I had back in the late 90's and early 2000's was an unrepentant and brazen counter raider. We had to be on constant vigil.
Our Westie wouldn't have been able to manage this, but she did once get up on the dining room table (because we stupidly didn't push in our chairs) and ate an entire coffee cake and a stick of butter before we discovered her.
Our labradoodle Missy, who had a notoriously sensitive tummy, once counter surfed a big bowl of stuffed peppers Mom had foolishly left out and ate the whole thing herself. And it had no effect on her. 😸
I once had an entire Thanksgiving dinner "stolen" from me when friend who was to do all the cooking at his brother's house and decided to wait until Thanksgiving morning to shop. He always did this elaborate meal with a turkey way too big and with far too many sides. But when we arrived at the city where we would spend Thanksgiving, we found NO supermarket open.
Though he tried valiantly to piece together a Thanksgiving meal from what he could find at a gas station 7/11, his brother's large family was understandably NOT HAPPY.
That was one of the things my mom didn't want to deal with when dad announced the family was getting a dog... a dog who could jump on the table and run away with the food.
This is one reason we ended up with doxies.
One day mom made an oops and dropped a pan of raw steak on the ground. Our doxie who was at her feet because she knew mom dropped food bits knew "food on the ground = mine" and she grabbed the biggest steak and took off running.
Dad and I had to tackle the dog and then to pry open her snarling mouth to get the big piece out of mouth. She was pissed with us for the rest of the day.
At one point when we had two cats and three dogs in the house, and did a buffet style Thanksgiving spread in the kitchen, eating in the dining room, the holiday felt more to me like I was on the clock as a security guard for shoplifting than a celebration.
Happy Thanksgiving, Wonkfriends! Everybody bailed on me again. Fortunately, this year I bought no food and will wing it depending on if anyone shows up.
Have fun in Rome. The food is exceptional - stick with the little hole-in-the-wall places and avoid the tourist traps and chains. My late wife insisted on a visit to the Hard Rock so she could get a pin for her collection, but the rest of the week we patronized a little cafe called La Diligencia Rosa, which unfortunately doesn’t appear to exist 25 years later. You’ll have to find one of your own.
"Here is a review of John Fetterman’s autobiography. It is not complimentary!"
I misread this and wondered why anyone would write an uncomplimentary autobiography. Then I realized it seems like something I would do. Then I realized the review was not complimentary. That was a wild couple of seconds.
I'm pretty sure the Pilgrims served rib roast with Corzetti Pasta with black walnut sauce as the primo course.. I heard the native Americans brought the buffalo Pecorino Romano and the olive oil.
"Thanksgiving Cooks Beware: Recipe bloggers say they’re seeing AI recipes that could ruin some Thanksgiving dinners. For instance, the creator of the Easy Peasy Foodie found online an AI-assembled version of her Christmas cake, but with a disturbing twist: instructions to bake it for three to four hours at 320°F. “You’d end up with charcoal!” she said."
Woke up to a WaPo headline (they keep trying to get me back ever since I unsubscribed, I dunno) saying TFG is fighting with his architect because he wants an EVEN BIGGER ballroom and all I can think is so many tens of millions of us suffering here in the US between high costs, inflation, poverty, rising health insurance costs, SNAP cuts, unemployment, underemployment, low pay, and he's fighting with his fucking ARCHITECT about a BIGGER BALLROOM. The Republican Party is a suicide pact: you join up to decide everyone but the billionaires should just fucking die, even if that eventually includes yourself. The Rs up to and including TFG are not even trying to hide their glee and joy at killing the rest of us anymore, they're getting THAT up in our faces. Not the headline I wanted to see the day before Thanksgiving. Their compassion for the rest of us is ZERO.
On day ONE, the Next Democratic Prez should bulldoze that White House abomination and ship the rubble to each of tRump's golf courses. The one in Virginia that is across the Potomac and on the C&O Canal at Riley's Lock, the one at Bedminster NJ, and, especially, the one at Mar-a-Lardo.
Incidentally, that's not a ballroom (have you seen tRump dancing with his fists?) it's a coronation hall and exactly the antithesis of what America is supposed to be.
It's also, in its original imagining, even bigger than the WH itself (90,000 feet vs. 55,000 feet) and TFG now wants it even bigger. That this "president for all people" happily lets us suffer while throwing tantrums about his fucking BALLROOM not being big enough paints a better picture of who and what he is than all the words I could ever throw at the topic.
Trying to find the oomph to get up from my cozy blanket nest and make the gluten free confetti cupcakes to share with our local kennel who are looking after our dog Thursday and Friday
I have a fieldmouse problem in my basement. I have set traps to catch the little bastards, but without much luck. Today, however, I found a mouse in the middle of basement floor, dead, and not by my hand. I think this was the mice's way of saying, Fuck you, Flashman (if that really is your name), we mice will die where and when we choose.
Your hed gif info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/brodys-brazen-turkey-heist
YOINK
https://substack.com/profile/157161662-littorally-speaking/note/c-181570375?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2lkipq
What has four legs and one arm?
A happy pitbull.
Our Tibetan Terrier boy once grabbed a Thanksgiving apple pie off the dining room table. It was just out of oven. It fell face down on the rug and I found him in there attempting to get the pie plate turned over so he could eat the pie. He did not succeed, but the thing was inedible for humans at this point. I cried.
HaaHaa 🤣 this actually happened to my girlfriend 😆 Gotta have my Tab's and Coffee in the Morning ☕💯👍
The Robin Hood of dogs probably got clear and shared that turkey with the other dogs in his neighborhood! (I just wish he had worn his cool little Robin Hood cap while he was doing it.)
My current puppy is a tri-paw with one back leg missing, so he is not a much of a counter pirate, but the black lab I had back in the late 90's and early 2000's was an unrepentant and brazen counter raider. We had to be on constant vigil.
Black labs are assassins when it comes to kitchen raids
I have so many stories about baby Sheba
Our Westie wouldn't have been able to manage this, but she did once get up on the dining room table (because we stupidly didn't push in our chairs) and ate an entire coffee cake and a stick of butter before we discovered her.
Our Westie did that as a tiny puppy, and we have never figured out how he managed to do it.
Fortunately, there was nothing edible or destructible on the table at that moment.
Bear was secretly conspiring with this puppers all along.
Brody's gotta eat! I think every doggo and kitteh have committed larceny with food at some time or another.
Our labradoodle Missy, who had a notoriously sensitive tummy, once counter surfed a big bowl of stuffed peppers Mom had foolishly left out and ate the whole thing herself. And it had no effect on her. 😸
Brody is my spirit animal.
Now I wanna be your dog.
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DHSUyF4LIAiY&ved=2ahUKEwi0naO0uZCRAxVBhIkEHd4VASwQo7QBegQIChAE&usg=AOvVaw36WKY1RRLLwDnzzpb21zkJ
Yup
This is clearly not Brody's first self-serve meal – not a single motion is wasted in his deftly executed heist!
I once had an entire Thanksgiving dinner "stolen" from me when friend who was to do all the cooking at his brother's house and decided to wait until Thanksgiving morning to shop. He always did this elaborate meal with a turkey way too big and with far too many sides. But when we arrived at the city where we would spend Thanksgiving, we found NO supermarket open.
Though he tried valiantly to piece together a Thanksgiving meal from what he could find at a gas station 7/11, his brother's large family was understandably NOT HAPPY.
"wait until Thanksgiving morning to shop"
Never a winning strategy. 😦
That was one of the things my mom didn't want to deal with when dad announced the family was getting a dog... a dog who could jump on the table and run away with the food.
This is one reason we ended up with doxies.
One day mom made an oops and dropped a pan of raw steak on the ground. Our doxie who was at her feet because she knew mom dropped food bits knew "food on the ground = mine" and she grabbed the biggest steak and took off running.
Dad and I had to tackle the dog and then to pry open her snarling mouth to get the big piece out of mouth. She was pissed with us for the rest of the day.
"Guess we're having Spam for dinner."
A Christmas Story made real
BUMPASSES!!!
At one point when we had two cats and three dogs in the house, and did a buffet style Thanksgiving spread in the kitchen, eating in the dining room, the holiday felt more to me like I was on the clock as a security guard for shoplifting than a celebration.
Happy Thanksgiving, Wonkfriends! Everybody bailed on me again. Fortunately, this year I bought no food and will wing it depending on if anyone shows up.
Have fun in Rome. The food is exceptional - stick with the little hole-in-the-wall places and avoid the tourist traps and chains. My late wife insisted on a visit to the Hard Rock so she could get a pin for her collection, but the rest of the week we patronized a little cafe called La Diligencia Rosa, which unfortunately doesn’t appear to exist 25 years later. You’ll have to find one of your own.
Safe travels! Have a GREAT time!
Pope Leo '82. I missed the memo. When were the Blues Brothers a trio?
Pope Leo from Chicago is on a mission from God.
"Here is a review of John Fetterman’s autobiography. It is not complimentary!"
I misread this and wondered why anyone would write an uncomplimentary autobiography. Then I realized it seems like something I would do. Then I realized the review was not complimentary. That was a wild couple of seconds.
I'm terrified for that puppy, what with all the bones large, small, and sharp, in that carcass.
I'm pretty sure the Pilgrims served rib roast with Corzetti Pasta with black walnut sauce as the primo course.. I heard the native Americans brought the buffalo Pecorino Romano and the olive oil.
pupper in the gif deserves his prize - silly hoomans thinking no reachy reachy
Beware online AI-generated recipes! Bloomberg reports:
"Thanksgiving Cooks Beware: Recipe bloggers say they’re seeing AI recipes that could ruin some Thanksgiving dinners. For instance, the creator of the Easy Peasy Foodie found online an AI-assembled version of her Christmas cake, but with a disturbing twist: instructions to bake it for three to four hours at 320°F. “You’d end up with charcoal!” she said."
oh noooooooooooooo
Woke up to a WaPo headline (they keep trying to get me back ever since I unsubscribed, I dunno) saying TFG is fighting with his architect because he wants an EVEN BIGGER ballroom and all I can think is so many tens of millions of us suffering here in the US between high costs, inflation, poverty, rising health insurance costs, SNAP cuts, unemployment, underemployment, low pay, and he's fighting with his fucking ARCHITECT about a BIGGER BALLROOM. The Republican Party is a suicide pact: you join up to decide everyone but the billionaires should just fucking die, even if that eventually includes yourself. The Rs up to and including TFG are not even trying to hide their glee and joy at killing the rest of us anymore, they're getting THAT up in our faces. Not the headline I wanted to see the day before Thanksgiving. Their compassion for the rest of us is ZERO.
On day ONE, the Next Democratic Prez should bulldoze that White House abomination and ship the rubble to each of tRump's golf courses. The one in Virginia that is across the Potomac and on the C&O Canal at Riley's Lock, the one at Bedminster NJ, and, especially, the one at Mar-a-Lardo.
Incidentally, that's not a ballroom (have you seen tRump dancing with his fists?) it's a coronation hall and exactly the antithesis of what America is supposed to be.
It's also, in its original imagining, even bigger than the WH itself (90,000 feet vs. 55,000 feet) and TFG now wants it even bigger. That this "president for all people" happily lets us suffer while throwing tantrums about his fucking BALLROOM not being big enough paints a better picture of who and what he is than all the words I could ever throw at the topic.
Turkey Bucks. Some things to keep in mind at Thanksgiving.
https://quartzevelyn.substack.com/p/thanksgiving-at-safeway?publication_id=718435&utm_campaign=email-post-title&r=rg5l&utm_medium=email
I am staring down the barrel of some whole berry cranberry sauce and a red velvet cake, and I don't want to do either of them right now.
A great deal of joy will result from your efforts, but sometimes that’s not quite enough to kickstart the work.
Trying to find the oomph to get up from my cozy blanket nest and make the gluten free confetti cupcakes to share with our local kennel who are looking after our dog Thursday and Friday
Just wanna say how much I enjoy reading the Wonketeer comments every day!
I have a fieldmouse problem in my basement. I have set traps to catch the little bastards, but without much luck. Today, however, I found a mouse in the middle of basement floor, dead, and not by my hand. I think this was the mice's way of saying, Fuck you, Flashman (if that really is your name), we mice will die where and when we choose.
You clearly have a shortage of cats.