Wonkagenda: Monday, September 12, 2016
Morning, Wonkers! It's Monday, so set aside your depression over the new work week, curl up in a cozy ball with yr Wonkette and let's do some news!
Hillary Clinton did the best James Brown impression during a 9/11 ceremony Sunday when she seemingly fainted while flanked by handlers.
Clinton called Trumpkins a "basket of deplorables" because the most vocal ones tend to be racist assholes. Clinton later apologized to mediocre gift baskets everywhere.
Do you remember the time when Trump bragged about his glass house being the tallest building in New York just after September 11? It happened.
CIA Director John Brennan called out Trump's bullshit assessment of his intelligence briefing.
Rudy Giuliani thinks Trump's idea about taking all the oil in Iraq not only physically possible (it's not), but also legal (nope) and just gosh-darn swell idea.
So many silly things were said during the Value Voters summit that it'll make your head spin around and spit pea soup while you hurl clever insults at a poor preacher.
More football people are are not standing during the national anthem .
The crazy guy who shot Reagan, John Hinckley Jr., was released from a psychiatric hospital and somehow, somewhere, someone is looking for a way to pin this on Obama.
Media Matters wants Fox News not to Benghazi its emails about how it obtained personal information from reporters and their anonymous sources.
Dick Cheney has balls to blame 9/11 on Obamain an op-ed. (Archive)
Congress critters are trying to decide whether or not to pay the bills (AGAIN!), or to just say, "Fuck it."
A nice lady in Maine is trying to unseat a GOP congressman by not being a complete lunatic.
That obnoxious Pharma-bro went to Clinton's house and then proceeded to be a complete douchebag.
Interwebz cyber jerks stole tax information about lots of people through the IRS's new tax transcript service.
A Utah cop and his family sat out the national anthem after Confederate flag was raised during a demolition derby.
Barbara Streisand wrote a Donald Trump song you didn't know you wanted.
And here's your morning Nice Time! It's Seth Meyers and Michelle Obama giving advice to college freshman at Howard University!
You haven't been visiting the wards, then, have you? Head over to Dead Breitfart's Home for Wayward Wingnuts. They already have the nice die, die, die signs out.
He doesn't "know what's going on" so he can later deny something factual and claim ignorance. That's one of his common MOs. He's really good at mincing like that. It's like a bird in flight. He's not even conscious he's doing this, it's done on pure instinct which is how stupid he is.