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Our next movie on March 30 is 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐃𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐧.

https://open.substack.com/pub/ziggywiggy/p/wonkette-movie-night-march-30-the?r=2knfuc&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

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Mar 24Liked by ziggywiggy

Between this film, Dungeons & Dragons and Glass Onion, Hugh Grant appears to have reached the "Fuck it, let's just have fun" phase of his career, and good luck to him.

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Did anyone send me a box of Pepperidge Farm cookies?

Sure free cookies are awesome but probably better to not eat things received anonymously in the mail.

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Mar 24Liked by ziggywiggy

Probably U.M. he sent Louise a jar of dog treats yesterday. What a rapscallion!

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It was him!

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That is my suspicion!

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Peggy Hill: "Wine? Pour it in a glass, throw an ice cube in there, and I'm good!"

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From this point forward, I Blame Robert Mondavi. And that is legally binding, because ice cubes.

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

After listening to reporting this morning, as a public service I am going to remind you yet again that *anyone* can efile taxes with the IRS for *free* regardless of whether you qualify for the new program this year (I don't). The option is through freefilefillableforms.org *ONLY* (do *NOT* google "free efile" - you will wind up with one of the putatively free, but-in-reality scam options from tax prep companies, as my daughter did - go directly from the irs website https://www.irs.gov/e-file-providers/free-file-fillable-forms ). I have used this option for over a decade. It takes a bit more effort than using software from the rat-bastard, vampire-squid, profiteering tax prep companies who have openly hamstrung IRS progress on this and on simplifying - and thus making fairer - the tax code for decades. After the kings, using the priests' entrails, with votes, on the tax-prep company execs is right up there in my book.

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Are Americans better off now than they were four years ago? It’s complicated. Also, it depends on who you ask and we asked Ohio diners.

NYT

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

I'd love to be still drunk at 7 or 8 AM and needing hash browns when those fucks showed up. Fox repeatedly goes to a diner about 3 miles north of me, but they'd lynch my drunk ass because it is all a setup.

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Can we launch him out of a cannon?

James Carville Sounds Off on Dems in Wild NYT Column, Says Party’s Culture is Being Dominated By ‘Too Many Preachy Females’

James Carville, the Democratic political strategist who led Bill Clinton to victory in the 1990s, claimed “too many preachy females” in the party may be to blame for turning voters off to Joe Biden.

https://www.mediaite.com/politics/james-carville-sounds-off-on-dems-in-wild-nyt-column-says-partys-culture-is-being-dominated-by-too-many-preachy-females/

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How is that skeletor still walking around? Hoisting Bill Clinton on us should not be something that should be rewarded.

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It's surprising he left unsaid that they are sapping and impurifying his precious bodily fluid.

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As long as I get to handle the ramrod.

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I'm not going to waste moments of my precious life reading Carville but YES more women in political culture and leadership PLEASE! And everywhere else. 50% might be a nice number. PREACH!

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I rather like RBG's take on the makeup of the Supreme Court. How many women is too many? "Nine."

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That fucking little shit. Yeah, launch him.

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I cannot stand that festering carbuncle of a human being.

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But he has such a lovely wife.

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I admit, because we're among friends here, that I had kind of a weird thing for him back in the day...like, the '90s. I thought he was fun and sexy in a way. Indeed, I had a friend of a friend who worked with him, and I was always begging to meet him, and that contact was a steadfast no, for reasons he wouldn't explain, but it all seems to have worked out for the best!

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Carville is a strange bird--troglodyte in many ways, but remains an astute practical strategist. Dismiss at our peril.

(Triangulation, while impractical now, was the right strategy for '92. Fwiw, he told the Clinton people it wasn't gonna work in '16, they did it anyway, and--among a multiple of other errors--produced a result which was, I think we all can agree, sub-optimal.

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I have unsubscribed from a thousand emails from that guy. But he comes right back and it's always offensive.

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

Babe, that was a friend to treasure. Wow!

Maybe even approaching the level of your kindness?? Hmm, would be hard.

*and no shame, either, you know that ❤️ *

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You're a brave woman, with occasionally bizarre penchants, apparently.

Hey, it was the '90s, we did that then, and it was usually a good thing! My theory is that it was partially due to an extended celebration of the end of the Reagan/ Bush pere era, and in retrospect, it was a damn good thing that we lived festively while we could. (I seem to have wandered away from your point, sorry.)

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Irony meter broke again.

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Ever since the Dobbs decision women have been handing Democrats victory after victory.

I wish I could get paid lots of money for being this bad at my job.

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This is for JustPixelz and Daniel, because you know what you did, namely this: https://www.wonkette.com/p/would-you-believe-its-cuddly-kitten/comment/52293256

--------------------

She was a query technician, she was sharp and realistic

And he was an actuary ace

He fed her files and she sent him statistics

In a dark, far off office space

Each had a healthy 'ppreciation of the other's mind

He said she was peerless, she said "You're too kind"

They had all this in common, and were good at math

She said, "Listen, baby, you can hear the server crash"

[Chorus]

Life in the cube farm, surely make you lose your soul

Life in the cube farm, huh

Life in the cube farm, hiding out like a mole

Life in the cube farm, uh-huh

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As tragic as Laken Riley's death was, why does Biden have to "Say Her Name!!!", while mentioning the names of mass shooting victims is shameless politics?

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founding

On the 86th anniversary of Holger Czukay's birth, some Can: "Dizzy Dizzy"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDl7ZhudkRg

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Biden has brought back 46 American hostages across the world.

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He doesn't strut around on stage and brag about it. What is wrong with that guy?

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

But if he doesn't say something about that, the MSM certainly won't.

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The man demonstrates this crazy sense of duty to his fellow citizens and actually gives a genuine damn regarding what happens to them.

Crazy, innit?

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So does anyone know what time Trump's bond is due tomorrow?

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I would presume he has until bank closing time tomorrow to come up with that $$$. That's generally the accept limit in situations like these.

I should investigate as to whether or not the court included a specific deadline time.

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does anybody really know what time it is?

does anybody really care?

you know, I can't imagine why

we've all got time enough to cry

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The National Institute of Standards and Technology. They even know what time it is *right now*!

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I'm pretty sure Trump has until 25 or 6 to four.

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

I've resorted to drinking wine (Robert Mondavi Life), yet I do not have a corkscrew around? All of my Victorinox (Swiss Army) knives have the more useful phillip's head driver in that slot. More useful until this moment.

Oh wait, there's one in my tackle box! I know where that is!

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If you're lucky you'll get a special pen in the mail from Doctors without Borders, which I've never sent any money to. But, the pen has a level, centimeter gauge, inch gauge, a swell pen, a phillips screwdriver, and if you lay it down, it's a rack to hold up your iphone! I was blessed in this way last week.

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I have seen those on Ebay and what-not. Seemed gimmicky, but now I want one!

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It's still excellent. I'm very proud of it and when my sons are coming over I put my phone sitting up in it so that they know I'm a happening person. I guess it's time I sent them some money. You could just send them some money (and ask for special pen.)

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Get a large screw and big ass pliers. You’ll figure it out.

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Check to make sure it's not a screw-top designed to look like a cork (I'm sure it's obvious how I learned about that).

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Boy is "screw-top" a misnomer. I used to buy a lot of Andre's Cold Duck and those things would not come off without pliers and a whole lot of well-wishing!

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Use your gun.

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

Isn't there a whole thing that rich assholes do where they chop open champagne bottles with an antique sword or some shit, spilling most of it?

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I've used a Phillips head screw and pliers...

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Bunch of MacGyvers up in here! Who, ironically for me, always used a Swiss Army Knife with a corkscrew.

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In a pinch a table knife will do the trick.

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I was with some guys from Switzerland-- German ones. They opened their bottled beers with sticks, pencils, scarves, baseball caps, their teeth, their noses, and their wives' wedding rings. They'd do these things while carrrying on a conversation about something or other.

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I use a sturdy paring knife, but same idea: work it down into the cork an inch or two, then twist while pulling gently but firmly. I've gotten very good at it.

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Or a tennis shoe...

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If you're relatively careful so will the curbside.

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LOL!

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I would ask why there's a corkscrew in your tackle box but I think we all know the answer to that one

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I've got my favorite corkscrew/bottle opener from the Beverly Hills Hotel in my purse at all times, next to my caviar key and spoon and a koozie, because you never know, and I'm not a snob.

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The only Jeff Foxworthy joke that resonated and made me belly-laugh was

"If you've ever been TOO DRUNK to FISH, you might be a redneck..."

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There is always a corkscrew in our glove boxes :)

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Very wise.

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Fishing is just day-drinking with an excuse.

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Two nails, gently hammered into the cork parallel with the bottle. Take a butter knife and slide it between the nails and twist. It works!

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Whoa, can't believe I've never heard about that method before: brilliant, thanks!

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Look at you!

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Very old friend lived in France :)

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Watching PAB melt down this morning. It’s glorious.

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Full details please?

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Impotent rage against Engoron and James, whiny about Merde Lego being values at $18 million, etc

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Like ❤️ this post to have a good day!

https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c77bc53-f90c-419b-8654-c27a682f0458_311x225.webp

🔮 You will now have a good day!

See you all this afternoon!

( ¡Sʎ∀ᗡ ᗡ∀q ƎƎᴚH⊥ noʎ ƃuıɹq ןןıʍ os ƃuıoᗡ ˙ʞuıן ǝɥʇ ƃuıʞɔıןɔ ʇnoɥʇıʍ ʇsod ʎɐᗡ pooƃ ɐ ǝʌɐH ǝɥʇ ƃuıʞıן ǝɹɐʍǝq)

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Penguins are cool. Literally.

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I just absolutely adore penguins!

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One of my neighbors is getting their house re-roofed. The crew was already going strong at first light yesterday morning when I took Katie for her walk, and they didn't stop until it was too dark to see in the evening. You know, because of how Mexicans are so lazy and shiftless. At it again today.

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Tom Russell has a cromulent song about the topic at hand:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZkAoosVLkA

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Lazy and shiftless and DEY TERK ER JERBS!

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Wait what? People say Mexicans are lazy? I can't keep up with the racist tropes these days. I thought they were taking all the jobs.

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There is room for both tropes simultaneously inside the head of a MAGAt.

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Right wingers are somehow able to believe lots of contradictory things. Immigrants are lazy and shiftless, but at the same time they're going to steal all the jobs. Joe Biden is too old and feeble to do anything, but at the same time, he's the criminal mastermind behind the Biden Crime Syndicate.

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When they have some free time they commit all the crimes, too. Multitasking!

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Yes.

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Yes. The wrecking crew to prepped for our new roof worked like crazy dawn until dusk. Of course, they took those jobs from hard-working American patriots who are desperate for the chance to strip tar and shingles from Florida roofs in June.

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We should all be such dedicated workers.

Rethugs degrade and demean this migrant workers because NONE of those pot-bellied white boys can drive a nail or operate a roofing gun to save their gawd damned lazy ass lives.

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I haven't seen a white man on a roofing crew in 30 years. It takes serious fortitude to spend your days up there when it's 115 degrees. Without Mexicans, there wouldn't be a functional roof on any house in the fucking city.

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As you and others have mentioned, we should certainly try that "day without Mexicans" sometime. California, among other states, would shut right down. And good luck later on buying produce, for the rest of the nation.

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So many of those men are genuine craftsmen with the kind of skills you apprentice for years to develop. It absolutely infuriates me that they're demeaned as unwanted grunt labor.

Jaysus.

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I did roofing back in the early aughts ^.^

Course it was Iowa so not a lot other going on that way that is not white, but totes props to the boss for hiring A Lady which was then an unheard of invention

Can confirm, some grueling work. Was fun though, but when I got preggo with spawn 2 I had to give it up, too many chemicals and straining

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Schrodinger's Immigrants: Simultaneously "Too lazy to work" and "Stealing all of our Jobs".

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Mar 24·edited Mar 24

That's the perfect name for them. They walk here for miles and days to work and they're among the hardest workers anywhere. But some people just have to crap on them because they're entitled.

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Bingo.

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