Wonkette's Top Ten Stories Of The Week Are The Real George Santos
Come read them!
Good morning!
Your present this week is that you get to join the Church of Scientology! Or ... not. Either way, here is a Scientology orientation video for you and your body thetans.
Scientology Cult Orientation www.youtube.com
This is all new to me as I did not get this far the time my mom gave me $50 to go take a Scientology personality test, largely because I could not stop giggling while hooked up to their special machine.
And here are your top ten stories of the week!
10. North Dakota Republican Declares LITTERBOX EMERGENCY. Don't Laugh At Her, She Is A Child Of God!
9. Hakeem Jeffries To Kevin McCarthy: Wanna Fight About Adam Schiff And Eric Swalwell? Let's Go.
8. Wonkette Movie Night: It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World
7. Wonkette Weekend Chat: The Adventure of the Supreme Court Leaker!
6. Welcome to Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Lemmy!
5. In Which The Dilbert Guy Gets Some Advice About Cars And Ladies
4. George Santos Was Drag Queen One Time Or For Three Years, Whatever
3. Trump Won An Entire Golf Tournament While He Was At Diamond's Funeral Whining. How? STAMINA!
2. Adam Schiff Reminds That Twit Kevin McCarthy That He Got FBI's Eric Swalwell Briefing Too
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When asked by reporters why the membership of the Church of Scientology was so overwhelmingly white, church officials replied, "That's where the money is."
You know they're judging you. Look what these idiots will put up with just to fly.