Horrifying news first, I am so sorry: Former Virginia Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax has murdered his wife, Cerina, and killed himself. Fairfax, a Democrat, was Ralph Northam’s lieut gov. When Northam was found to have done Blackface costumes as a young man, Wonkette demanded and party leaders considered asking that he resign — until women came forward to say Fairfax, who would have replaced him, had assaulted them, and Northam’s proposed resignation was shelved. Fairfax then tried to run to replace him after he was termed out, and lost badly. Their three children were reportedly at home. (NBC News)
Now on to things that are normal-terrible, and in some cases, even nice.
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How many WARS can Pete Hegseth fight at once, is it 100? (USA Today)
Ahhhhh yes, the 2019 impeachment whistleblower and the Inspector General “manufactured a conspiracy” by blowing the whistle on Trump’s perfect call and then informing Congress about it, yes yes yes. And now Tulsi’s filing criminal referrals. Because exposing illegal acts is illegal when the illegal acts are Trump’s. (Fox News)
The FTC found the antitrust! And so they … forced a settlement demanding companies advertise on Elno’s Nazi playground because “ad agencies violated antitrust rules by agreeing to a common set of brand safety rules.” Words have no meaning anymore :) (The Verge)
First ICE agent that I know of to be hit with felony charges for, you know, doing felonies in Minnesota to citizens and noncitizens alike. Go to jail forever. (Gift link Star Tribune)
Chris Geidner thinks Justice Sonia Sotomayor was if not right then at least not wrong to apologize to Brett Kavanaugh for explaining to law students how full of shit he is. Because I trust Chris Geidner then I suppose I won’t be mad about it. (Law Dork)
Illegal immigrants are keeping our Social Security and Medicare alive in addition to keeping our olds alive and our young cared for and the food on our tables and all of the other things. Receipts. (America’s Voice)
The “pink pill pipeline” is luring in young women with frothy celebrity content before sucking them into the sewer of “you don’t want to vote sweetie” and “birth control is unnatural, you should have babies and stay home.” (Kylie Cheung at Abortion, Every Day)
Yes, Virginia, Republicans are very concerned about your mean gerrymandering, a thing that they and Barack Obama would never do! (Bad Faith Times)
Philadelphia prettied up some blighted lots, and people were like “hey, let’s not crime!” (Reasons to Be Cheerful)
What the fuck, Fodor’s, that’s an Onion story. It’s not supposed to be real. (Fodor’s / The Onion)
Hope nobody was planning on flying anywhere! (Fodor’s)
Like for instance Hawaii, Hawaii, Montana, or SF!
Do-Do-Do-DOOOO! Announcing The 2026 Wonkette Friends And Family (That’s You, Dummies) Tour For 2026!
News From Places I Have Lived In!
New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani didn’t just tax the rich on Tax Day, he got NY Gov. Kathy Hochul to go along with it too, heart-hug! (The American Prospect)
Mallory McMorrow (whom I’m supporting for US Senate from Michigan) and Abdul El-Sayed (whom you are allowed to support if you so choose) are neck and neck in the Democratic primary, and Haley Stevens, who is mortifying and for some reason Chuck Schumer’s choice, is trailing. Here’s a video from Mallory about surveillance pricing, UGH.
And here’s a blogpost by her (or her staff) about their Q1 fundraising and some other stuff, which I’m just linking for the bonus Donna Rose pic. (McMorrow substack) And here’s a post on her maternal mortality agenda, which I’m linking because Maternal Mortality. (McMorrow again)
California Wonkers, you’re something like a third of our readership, and we never even cover you at all, you’re too busy just being chill and mostly sane! But I’m going to try to do so more, so: Mayor Karen Bass has released her Climate Action Plan for LA! (Los Angeles City Dot Gov) Inside the 100 Hours Before Swalwell GTFO. (CNN) Whatchall think about Tom Steyer v. Katie Porter for CA gov? Or are you going Nice Becerra? I don’t hate any of them! Steyer’s a billionaire, but he and I are both practically one issue voters on climate change. Anyway, apparently he’s taken over all your airwaves, hope it’s not that annoying! This has been a blurb about California. (Politico)
Montana state supreme court just keeps refusing to be shitty, Trans Rights Are Human Rights edition! (Erin in the Morning)
And that’s the news in places I have lived.
News From the Place Dok Lives In
What the fuck, Boise? Almost a year after a county commissioner allegedly stabbed a minor girl and threatened to slash her mother’s throat after a drunken set-to on the river, the police haven’t finished their investigation because “case load.” (Gift link Idaho Statesman)
What the fuck even. World’s gone wrong.
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Here's something to brighten your morning, if you missed it last night. Your Aunt Aoife, The Estivating Hibernian has another batch of Postcards to That Asshole (#23).
"Say Yes! to mushrooms. Say Oh Hell No! to mushroom clouds."
https://theestivatinghibernian.substack.com/p/postcards-to-that-asshole-23?utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=post%20viewer