168 Comments

And the bar owner says, "Crap, I should have burned the joint down for the insurance money last week."

Expand full comment

And God says, "Annointed him? I never even met him!"

Expand full comment

And Cruz 2 says to Cruz 1, "Damn man, you're the most self-satisfied prick I've ever seen.

And Cruz 3 says, "Really? Look in the mirror, boys."

Expand full comment

Amen, brother.

Clinton and Obama ultimately chose to embrace the messy details of their respective upbringings in an effort to connect and humanize, whereas Cruz has chosen to erase the messy details of his in an effort to deflect and lionize.

It's one thing to perhaps cynically shape a politically advantageous creation myth about one's self; it's something else entirely to do so while self-righteously spelling "creation" with a capital 'C'.

Expand full comment

John Boehner? Is that you?

Expand full comment

Paper ballot cuts

Expand full comment

It's too hip to hop. Damn hipsters.

Expand full comment

Twansfawmative wuv of Jeeezus...

Expand full comment

The frothy mix for VP please!!! I may even start to believe in a higher power if it gives us a Cruz/Santorum'16 ticket!

Expand full comment

Confused Pagan beekeepers?

Expand full comment

the only outside light coming into my bed room is thru a set of NW facing glass doors. around 7:15 a rock rolled thru my doors. I hope my homeowner insurance thinks it was an act of gawd.

Expand full comment

I'm sure Palin wouldn't say "no"

Expand full comment

Ted Cruz is an Immaculate Mis-Conception.

Expand full comment

It must be working, because, every time I read about what Ted is doing, I find myself saying say, "Jesus!"

Expand full comment

South of our one drop rule borders the term black and white are very fluid. I will attach a picture of a story from "The Legal History of the Color Line"

Expand full comment