Y’all. Y’ALL. Donna Rose and Lu had a New Year’s Eve fondue slumber party and those girls kept me up till SEVEN THIRTY AM. And then we had a brunch party! And now it’s 4:48 p.m. and people just left! And I AM GOING TO DIE. So here’s whatever tabs I had open already, and if we get even to six, I am a goddamn hero.
Your Wonkette Saturday movie night will be The Muppet Christmas Carol, available for free on the Internet Archive. Free with subscription on Disney+. $3.99 in the usual places.
Yay yay yay yay yay!
National Guard retreats from its invasions of blue cities and states. (LA Times)
This utter fuck. (People magazine)
THE WRONG KID DIED. (Tatiana Schlossberg at New Yorker)
Islam digs Jesus. (Islam Today)
Arizona canceled medical debt for half a million people. Fuckin’ rock it, Arizona! (KNAU)
What didn’t Elon Musk do this year? A single thing he promised. (Mashable)
Jack Smith’s deposition transcript. (House)
From long-ago comments, the Rembrandt thief who came out on top! (Hyperallergic)
Also from the comments. My favorite part is Carole King loooosing her miiiiiind.
That was so many tabs, it was even more than six. HERO!!!!!!!
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Your hed gif info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/toothy-titan-triggerfish
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/38445d76-92c7-4402-9d76-abdd9af610cb?utm_source=share
The whys and wherefores of fruit stickers: https://www.seriouseats.com/why-do-fruit-stickers-exist-11874523