305 Comments

I've picked my fighters. Dan Goldman, Jamie Raskin, Sheldon Whitehouse, and there's more...

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Eric Swalwell----

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DARK BRANDON BIG STRONG PIMP!!!!

DARK BRANDON: 2024

FO SHOR!!!!!!

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I note the reference to Deliverance. I just need to remind all the good folk of Wonkette that the setting of James Dickey's novel Deliverance was the Northwest corner of Georgia - precisely MTG's district. So, no surprise there.

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You saying her family tree doesn't fork?

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Just like her toes.

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I read that she forked most of the dudes she knew. amirite?

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Yeah, let's not do that. She's terrible enough without trying to slut-shame.

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empty no-toes is the fred flintstone of lauren boeberts.....

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No, seriously, she stuck them in the eye with a fork.

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Sep 15, 2023·edited Sep 15, 2023

Why would ‘Murrica want intelligent, eloquent and elegant fighters in her corner, when she could have Pigfucker & Pigfucker fighting for her rights?!?

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PIGFUCKER/PIGFUCKER 2024

Make America's Pigs Fucked Again

MAPFA!!!!! (cheap red hats made in china, FTW)

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"Cuz Makin Bacon ain't pretty"

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Dan Goldman represents me in Congress. His sparkling wit and welcome snark almost make up for losing Carolyn Maloney. She was a wonderful chair of Oversight.

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Hebrews 11:1 – “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”

I feel like this case that Republicans are bringing against Joe Biden reminds me of the above.

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I think faith in something means there's a chance in hell it exists. You're hoping it does.

This case is 'different' than that.

;-)

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There is little to no evidence Hunter did anything illegal other than not filing taxes for a couple if years and lying about having a drug habit on a firearm application. But the IRS seldom brings charged against someone if the settle their debt, and the firearm charge is almost never discovered or prosecuted. So calling this the Biden Crime family is bullshit since years of investigation into Hunter's business dealings have not shown him to have done anything illegal and some people who were later charged with crimes did not involve Hunter at all.

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Not to mention (but I will) Roger Stone sat with $2 million of unpaid taxes for something like 10 years. Where was this howling mob then?

Oh, I forgot. IOKIYAR.

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True. But the term 'Trump crime family' was getting some attention a few months back, and over there in the mirror world they take as gospel that if Their Guy is getting tarred with that particular brush, well then Our Guy has to get the same treatment. Because both sides doncha know.

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It's just like how Christian movies/pop music/everything else is usually a lame rip-off of regular old culture (that term being broadly defined in an American context).

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PJ O'Rourke, in his hilarious "Holidays in Hell," wondered aloud whether there was a book entitled "I found Jesus and lost all my talent."

I've suspected that book exists, too.

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Also because they can't come up with any original ideas.

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Even "Jewish fellah mouths off and finds out" is ripped off from other mystery religions.

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founding

I think “Seriously, you comestains” should be the default response of anyone to anything said by the MAGAt Caucus.

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There is certainly no call for rational argument with them at this juncture.

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i like that he calls out the next step from the R's is a shut down - so the Dems can all shout 'we told you so' when that happens

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...and it reinforces the idea that this is the repubs fault & that they planned for it to happen. The more they can get ahead of this before the actual shutdown, the better they can shape that narrative.

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Dan Goldman was temporarily beset with insanity after the second impeachment and thought about retiring, and all the liberal women across America stood up and said "OH HELL NO!", and he changed his mind.

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Unlike Drumpf Dan Goldman knows words. He has the Best Words. And he can kick a** with them.

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Having an idiot for an adversary is a rare stroke of luck. In Jordan and Comer, Biden has drawn two of them. The luck of the Irish!

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Although I, and several other Wonkers, have already claimed Goldman as our boyfriend, it makes me nervous when Evan does it.

Remember Michael Avenatti? Or “Hot Johnny” McIntee?

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Didn't he once consider the Slender Man Jared attractive?

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He's my Congress HUSBAND, thank you very much. And he is, indeed, dashing.

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"Stranger Danger Caucus" is so good it ought to be trademarked!

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𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥 𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴. 𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘛𝘝 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘨𝘯, 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘋𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘥 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘴 𝘶𝘱 𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴.

Stupid cumstain libelz!

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Yeah, at least cum has a purpose.

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