President Bone Spurs Has Surprise For West Point Cadets! It Is Probably Coronavirus :(

Have we talked about this West Point thing yet? We have not. There is too much news.

In case you needed your hourly reminder that Donald Trump, on top of being abjectly stupid, is also the most selfish amoral person on planet Earth, who cares about nothing outside of how it affects his ratings or his image, here you go: Trump has HEREBY DECLARED that he is speaking at West Point's commencement, so that he may be clapped at, and so that he may appear like a big balls wartime president who has lots of big balls. Did we mention he also wants another Dear Leader military parade for the 4th? In the middle of a pandemic?

The New York Times reported late Friday on the backstory on Trump's sudden announcement a week before that, after pretty much every other military academy had moved or postponed their commencements or taken them virtual, he would be speaking at West Point's commencement. He did not mention whether he would bring his bone spurs to show the cadets.

"That was news to everyone, including officials at West Point," according to the Times, which reports that plans were still very much up in the air about how West Point was going to handle commencement. The Times notes that the Naval Academy is doing its commencement on the internet, and the Air Force Academy held its commencement early, with social distancing, and Vice President MikePence McNoMask delivered the address, wearing no mask, and also with no cheering crowd in attendance. No fair if Mike gets to do one! Trump is wartime president! He should get to do bigger one than MikePence NoMask!

The academy had been looking at the option of a delayed presidential commencement in June, but had yet to complete any plans. With Mr. Trump's pre-emptive statement, they are now summoning 1,000 cadets scattered across the country to return to campus in New York, the state that is the center of the outbreak.

Trump made his announcement during his coronavirus press briefing, without consulting anyone, the day before Vice President NoMask's Air Force address. You know, because Trump is a thirsty fuckin' baby, and you do not steal his spotlight.

Mr. Trump told reporters that he would be speaking at the West Point graduation in the near future, noting that he did not like the look of a socially distanced graduation and that he hoped the "look" of the ceremony would be "nice and tight." He did not announce a date for the event.

President Infecty The Clown wants Army guys to CLAP FOR HIM and he wants their Army bodies to be CLOSE TOGETHER.

The commencement will now be June 13.

So let's think about this real fast.

You're talking about 1,000 cadets, who have already gone home for the rest of the year and have been finishing classes online. They now have to fly commercially back from wherever they've been to West Point, which is in the New York City metro area, AKA the first Ground Zero of the coronavirus pandemic.

And then, explained West Point superintendent Lt. Gen. Darryl Williams to the Times, there is so much more! First they have to test the cadets, and that will not happen on campus. Then they have to be "monitored for 14 days." And they're not sure if the cadets are going to have roommate situations, or ...

And they're not sure if the cadets' families are going to be allowed to come, but ...

"All 1,000 of them will not intermix," he said. "They'll be in their rooms. They'll have their masks on. Groups will be segregated in the mess hall when they eat."

For two weeks.

So President Bone Spurs can put on the world's tiniest codpiece and pretend to be a big military tough guy and get Army guys to clap at him.

And then, we guess, they'll fly back to their families before reporting to wherever they're reporting to for active duty. One thousand of them, from all over US America. The Times does note that the seniors — they call them "firsties" — would have had to come back anyway in some form or fashion, to do exams and collect their shit. But something tells us they might have been able to finagle a safer way, where the cadets wouldn't have had to be on campus for weeks on end, were President Chickenshit not stomping his feet and demanding a ceremony.

Is there already coronavirus among the West Point population, that we're aware of? But of course.

Since leaving campus in March, a handful of the academy's 4,400 cadets have tested positive for the coronavirus, and about 30 staff and faculty members have tested positive, said Lt. Col. Christopher Ophardt, an academy spokesman.

The Times notes that this is happening in a year where "[o]ne cadet was killed and 21 others injured last June after a military vehicle overturned en route to a training exercise near the academy," and then months later "a cadet killed himself." So it's not surprising that the Times has off-the-record quotes from faculty saying they're worried about how this latest tragedy will affect cadets' mental health.

So this is awesome, and definitely another example of Donald Trump really giving a fuck about the troops. There are just so many.

If you want to get madder about this, read the words of retired Lt. Gen. Mark Hertling, a West Point grad and the parent of a West Point alum, over at Fake News CNN. And then read West Point grad and Iraq veteran Waitman Wade Beorn at the Amazon Bezos Washington Post. They are probably the Deep State, as they don't seem overly concerned with glorifying Dear Leader.

Beorn also talks about the big 4th of July tinpot dictator parade, which Trump says is going to happen again.

In the middle of a pandemic.

Man, fuck Donald Trump so hard.

[New York Times]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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