Professional Silly Person Michele Fiore Launches Gun-Toting Run For Nevada Gov

Las Vegas Councilwoman Michele Fiore announced Tuesday that she's running for governor of Nevada, an American state. The press describes her as a “GOP firebrand," which is the journalistic way of saying she's off her rocker. Fiore's campaign launch video is all kinds of “woo boy." She's got a “three shot plan" for Nevada that involves her shooting at objects like an emotionally well-adjusted human.

The ad opens with Fiore arriving in the middle of nowhere in a pickup truck. That's the vehicle of choice for badass conservatives and possibly Las Vegas-area mobsters who want to dispose of a body. There's a "Trump 2024" sticker on the truck's backside, which is fitting, and Fiore boasts about her devotion to the insurrectionist in chief and constitutional scholar.

FIORE: I was one of the first electeds to endorse Donald J. Trump, and you better believe I was attacked for it. The Washington Post called me a "gun-toting calendar girl," and Politico magazine said that I was the "Lady Trump." And I don't care!

Yes, she cares so little she devotes air time in her own campaign ad to how much the media think she sucks instead of sharing anything remotely positive about herself. Bold strategy, Councilwoman.

Fiore claims Nevada needs “outsiders" and “fighters" not the “same old, boring moderate compromise blue-blazer politicians." Her example of such a loathsome creature is Senator Mitt Romney from Utah, who admittedly is pretty dull and rocks blue blazers but he's hardly a moderate. Fiore's “proof" of Romney's compromising positions is a video of him denouncing the January 6 MAGA attack on the Capitol. She then pushes over the TV set playing the video. Romney go boom! Fiore's fully on Team Insurrection.

Her three-shot plan is simple, like a not especially bright child. She pulls her handgun and fires at socialism-branded beer bottles (no, really) labeled “vaccine mandates," “critical race theory," and “voter fraud." Nevada's Republican Secretary of State Barbara Cegavske completed a review of the 2020 election in April and her office found no evidence supporting her party's claims of rampant voter fraud. Fiore could've saved that bottle of beer.

Democratic incumbent Steve Sisolak is up for re-election in 2022, and this summer he signed into law Assembly Bill 261, which requires K-through-12 schools to "teach the histories and contributions of frequently marginalized groups, such as immigrants, Native Americans, religious organizations, and the LGBTQ community." Dolts like Fiore will attack this as “critical race theory," a popular rightwing bogeyman right now.

Just 52 percent of Nevada's population is fully vaccinated, and large groups of strangers gathering together are what fuels Nevada's entertainment, tourism and hospitality industries. A little more than a third of Nevada's Clark County was fully vaccinated when the state re-opened in June. The result was predictable. COVID-19 cases surged almost 200 percent by July. Las Vegas was declared a “sustained hot spot" and potential tourists were warned to stay away for their own safety. The unemployment rate was 10 percent in September.

Vaccine mandates are obviously critical to ensuring the state's economic recovery, but Fiore would prefer to literally open fire on the concept. The frustrating irony is that if Fiore and her fellow Republicans had actively encouraged vaccination instead of promoting conspiracy theories, maybe mandates wouldn't be necessary. (Fiore has been anti-vax for a while, even before COVID-19.) Las Vegas Mayor Carolyn Goodman, an independent, still downplays the severity of the pandemic and pushes back against most COVID-19 mitigation measures. This is like Miami's mayor shrugging off the threat from hurricanes.

Sisolak won by just four points in 2018, a banner year for Democrats. We shouldn't take anything for granted in 2022. Nevada voters should consider Andrew Shepherd's words from The American President: "We have serious problems to solve, and we need serious people to solve them." Fiore isn't a serious person. She's only interested in blowing shit up.


Follow Stephen Robinson on Twitter.

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

Yr Wonkette is 100 percent ad-free and entirely supported by reader donations. That's you! Please click the clickie, if you are able!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc