Rand Paul Will Be Tough On Iran Like Reagan Was. Um.

• Sen. Rand Paul had a hell of a Tuesday kicking off his already failrific presidential campaign. So many gems. So many instant classics. So many LOLZ. And, as digby says, he gets Quote 'o the Day for this:

  I believe in applying Reagan’s approach to foreign policy to the Iran issue.

  That picture up there at the top is your reminder of Reagan's approach. And also, kids, why you should ALWAYS READ DIGBY. She won't just make you smarter (though she'll do plenty of that), but she'll also make you laugh.

• Charles Pierce at Esquire had another good catch from Rand Paul's terrible speech about how he would like to be president:

  We need to boldly proclaim our vision for America. We need to go boldly forth under the banner of liberty that clutches the Constitution in one hand and the Bill of Rights in the other.

  As Mr. Pierce notes (another one you should always read, kids):

  First of all, banners don't have hands. Second of all, you can carry the Constitution and the Bill of Rights in one hand because they are part of the same document. I mention this because, one day, Aqua Buddha might want to go boldly forth while eating a sandwich.

• OK, just one more because we can't resist reporting on this particular Rand Paul oops. On his campaign website, you can be many things: a conservative for Rand, an Iowan for Rand, an African-American for Rand. And now there is this "correction": 

  

  
   If you are a Jewish for Rand, (a) please let us know in the comments, which we do not allow; and (b) what the hell is wrong with you?

• And now for something completely different:  

  “I loveArrested Development, but it [was] never a huge thing,” [executive producer Grian] Grazer said. “But people are loyal to it, and we’re going to do another 17 episodes. So stay tuned forArrested Development.”

• In other teevee news, our friends at Happy Nice Time People have once again selflessly watched19 Kids And They're Still Poppin 'Em Out Like Rabbitsso we don't have to:

  It’s the rehearsal dinner time on 19 Kids & Counting. As Jessa and Ben count down the final hours before the wedding, brownies get baked, make-out opportunities get wasted, and the happy couple gets toasted.

• Tom DeLay -- disgraced former speaker of the House, ex-con, and loser fromDancing With the Stars-- wants Christians to rise up in an epic battle against The Gay:

  We're now seeing what the gay agenda is all about ... What they're trying to do is to undermine religious liberty so that they become an accepted sexual orientation. That's what's going on here and we have got to fight this battle to the bitter end because once you let the government dictate to you what you believe and what your values are, then this country's finished.

• People don't want to buy used iPhones advertised online if they think those phones come from poors because they might get poor cooties or something:

  A new study from researchers at NYU suggests that this happens: Fewer would-be buyers are likely to respond to an ad like this when it looks like the seller comes from a low-income neighborhood.

  This finding, from research by Max Besbris, Jacob William Faber, Peter Rich and Patrick Sharkey, suggests that the stigma attached to disadvantaged neighborhoods can affect even the ability of people who live there to do a task as small as trying to sell a used phone online. It suggests that where you live in the real world matters online, too — especially if that place evokes negative assumptions about race and class. [...]

  In each case, the seller offered to meet in a neutral location or the buyer's neighborhood. Across all of these cities combined, the researchers found that sellers from struggling neighborhoods got about 16 percent fewer responses from curious buyers in the days after the ad went up. The effect was larger when the poor neighborhood was also a predominantly black one.

• You're not seeing ghosts, you're just breathing toxins, probably:

  Shane Rogers, an engineering professor at Clarkson University, said the experiences described in many hauntings resemble neurological symptoms present in exposure to hallucinogenic toxins such as rye ergot fungus – which has been blamed for the Salem witch trials and was later synthesized as LSD.

  Although the psychological effects of toxic molds are not well-established, Rogers said many hauntings are reported in ideal environments for molds and other air toxins.