Frothy hater of erotic freedom Rick Santorum surprised a lot of people this weekend when he said that Bruce Jenner, who revealed in a widely watched interview with Diane Sawyer that he (that is the pronoun Jenner has requested for now, so preemptively shut up, thanks) is transgender and identifies as a woman, is deserving of human compassion and respect, and that we should take Jenner at his word. Is this the Santorum we know and loathe? Did he fall down and hit his head? What are these compassionate words he is saying???


“If he says he’s a woman, then he’s a woman,” Santorum, who is weighing running for president again in 2016, said in response to a question from BuzzFeed News during a roundtable with reporters at the South Carolina Republican Party’s convention. “My responsibility as a human being is to love and accept everybody. Not to criticize people for who they are. I can criticize, and I do, for what people do, for their behavior. But as far as for who they are, you have to respect everybody, and these are obviously complex issues for businesses, for society, and I think we have to look at it in a way that is compassionate and respectful of everybody.”

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Whaaaaat?! Okay, Rick Santorum acknowledges that Jenner is a woman, and wants to love and accept everybody and seriously, did Rick Santorum get struck by lightning or something? Perhaps he had a stroke? Do not worry, Santorum remains the healthy, frothy mix of lube and fecal matter we are accustomed to, as he has clarified on Facebook that no, he did not mean to be nice, and no, this doesn't mean transgender people should actually be treated like human beings:

Many of you may have read a story published by the website BuzzFeed where I was asked for my thoughts regarding Bruce Jenner. My comment affirmed Jenner as a person, made by God in His likeness as we all are. It was meant to express empathy not a change in public policy.‪#‎compassion‬

Boy, Santorum sure stepped in a puddle of himself, didn't he? It says something about the state of right-wing douchenozzlery in America when a presumed presidential candidate feels the need to make a public apology for being TOO NICE.

But good, we are glad that this is cleared up. Rick Santorum acknowledges that Bruce Jenner is a human being, but don't you go thinking this means Santorum would advocate for policies that would make life better for Jenner and other transgender people, MANY OF WHOM -- science fact -- are not members of the Kardashian family.

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All you wingnuts out there can breathe a sigh of relief. When Rick Santorum decides to be president, you can sleep soundly knowing that he's the guy you can trust to stand up for your religious freedom, take away your condoms (because if it's not bareback, it doesn't count), force pregnant rape victims to carry their Broken Rape Gifts From Heaven to term, and all of that. All he said was that a trans person is a human being, but he didn't mean it like that. He's still the creepy, sex-obsessed jizz-goblin of a presidential candidate you've always dreamed of!

[Buzzfeed/Facebook via Gawker]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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