So this is the hill they're dying on. Donald Trump comes up with 1,000 new racisms and sexisms per day, he's tanking in the polls and the only strategy he knows is to double down and hope at least his base is still motivated by rank stupidity, hatred, and resentment. And we guess if you're the RNC, then where he leads, you are HEREBY ORDERED to follow.

Meet RNC spokesperson Liz Harrington. She went on Fox News to bellyache about a very nice Fourth of July op-ed Joe Biden wrote. Therein he said many controversial things, like that ending slavery was a good thing, and women's suffrage was also good. Not only that, but Joe Biden proudly expressed support for Brown v. Board of Education, the Civil Rights Act, the Voting Rights Act, and DACA and marriage equality and Black Lives Matter and all the rest.

Fuck does he get off? What's he trying to do, form some kind of more perfect union or something? Who does he think he is, THE PREAMBLE TO THE CONSTITUTION?

Here's the part that really climbed up the RNC lady's ass and stayed there:

Independence Day is a celebration of our persistent march toward greater justice — the natural expansion of our founding notion from "all men are created equal" to "all people are created equal and should be treated equally throughout their lives."

WHOA HEY WHOA HEY, WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE MEN? Because, like, if all people should be treated equally, and if all people are created equal, doesn't that mean Joe Biden hates all men? It obviously does.

Harrington went on Fox News to say all the things:

RNC's Liz Harrington denounces 'all people are created equal'

HARRINGTON: It's amazing for Joe Biden to talk about eroding our foundation when his party is taking a sledgehammer to it. They're saying you can't go to Mt. Rushmore, you can't celebrate Washington, Jefferson and Lincoln. [...]

His party is trying to rewrite history, tear it all down. And it's very fitting that Joe Biden, in this op-ed, has the audacity to literally rewrite the greatest foundational document in this history of mankind, the Declaration of Independence.

His woke staffers changed it to — not 'all men are created equal' — all people are created equal, and are guaranteed equality throughout life.

That is not a constitutional republic, that we were founded on, on freedom of opportunity. That's the same radical left socialism that has taken over his party. That is really not just eroding our foundation, but rewriting it and out to destroy it.

LOL. All righty, mad RNC person!

We see that she's twisting Biden's words — because she's a Republican, and therefore a liar — and trying really hard to squeeze some kind of declaration of socialism out of Biden's op-ed. He said people should be treated equally, but Harrington turned that into "guaranteed equality," which is some very slight sleight of hand. The Trump campaign has zero message besides "Vote for the racist loser, Mother Russia can't do this alone," though, so we can see why they're stretching.

But then you have that part about his WOKE STAFFERS literally "changing" the Declaration, which of course did not happen. The op-ed, read in full and right side up, is of a piece with any message about the arc of the moral universe being long, but bending toward justice, and about how that very Declaration is something America has never actually lived up to. But throughout history, people have been trying.

But sure, super normal RNC jackass lady, if that's your message, we hear it loud and clear.

The last only time Wonkette ever has mentioned Liz Harrington was when, in a former life, she was writing very important columns in the Washington Free Beacon about the Obamas' dog Sunny being a BAD DOG THAT POOPS IN THE WHITE HOUSE.

There was also this very important Free Beacon column:

That DOES sound like the future liberals want, with the first sex change at nine, the first voting for socialists at 16, but no smoking until 21. She doesn't mention when the liberals want people to get their second sex change, but oh well fuck it, point is we are dealing with a very serious person here.

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!

Wonkette is fully funded by readers like YOU. If you love Wonkette, WE NEED YOUR LOVE GIFTS TO KEEP US GOING.

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc