Just In Time For Halloween: Ronna McDaniel's Rainbow Fentanyl Maaaadness!

CNN's Fareed Zakaria interviewed former President Bill Clinton on Sunday, and the former president expressed optimism about Democrats' chances in the upcoming midterm elections.

We could hold both [the House and Senate] but we have to say the right things, and we have to note the Republicans always close well. Why? Because they find some new way to scare the living daylights out of swing voters about something.

When I saw this interview, I disagreed slightly with Clinton's assertion that Republicans "always close well." I think that implies that Republicans are like slick salesman Ricky Roma from Glengarry Glen Ross. Republicans don't actually win on the merits. They aggressively cheat and break even their own arbitrary rules. The Republican Party is nothing without partisan gerrymandering, voter suppression laws, and rightwing hack judges. Maybe Republicans nail a three-pointer after shooting everyone else on the court, but that's almost for show.

However, Clinton's absolutely right that striking fear in the hearts of white folks is Republicans' primary persuasion tactic, and Tuesday, Republican National Committee chair and perpetual lying machine Ronna McDaniel proved his point.

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On "America's Newsroom," McDaniel conceded that Republicans aren't exactly riding a Red Wave post-Dobbs, but they have a strategy for addressing the abortion issue.

MCDANIEL: I do not think [Republicans] can ignore it. I think they have to take it head on. This is where the Democrats want to play. They'll have the money to make this an issue. So we have to tackle it, put them on the defensive on their policy of due date abortion, on gender selection abortion – I think that's what China does, that you can abort a baby just because it's a girl.

Oh, so, their strategy is just a pack of deranged lies. Imagine our total lack of surprise.



"Due date abortion" sounds like someone proactively scheduling an abortion on the date their pregnancy is due. I guess "due date abortion" is intended to call out Democrats for apparently supporting abortion until the date of birth or even two or three weeks afterward, if you believe what's said at a Trump rally. The problem for Republican liars is that the post-Roe reality has highlighted why late-term abortions take place and how these bans endanger the health and life of pregnant people.

"Gender-selection abortion" is difficult to track because the government doesn't have mind-reading technology. This is another scare tactic. Sex-selective abortion is illegal in China, so McDaniel's statement is another gross, racist lie. The larger problem is state control over Chinese women's bodies. In 2018, the Jiangxi province issued guidelines requiring that women more than 14 weeks pregnant provide signed approval from three medical professionals confirming an abortion is medically necessary. That’s the future Republicans want.

Dana Bash showed McDaniel the CNN clip of Clinton accusing Republicans of fear-mongering, but McDaniel remained defiantly shameless. She's a pro.

MCDANIEL: Newsflash, Bill, your party's doing that just fine ... You're scaring voters everywhere with the open border ... Just last month, 2,000 pounds of fentanyl came across our border. That could kill 500 million people.

US Border Patrol seized these drugs at the border. Republicans seemingly struggle with the words "seize" and "confiscate." The drugs aren't free to stalk the nation like serial killers, ready to murder, well, everyone. The US population is just 329 million people.

MCDANIEL: Halloween is coming up. Every mom in the country is worried right now, what if this gets into my kid's Halloween basket?

BASH: You mean, the rainbow fentanyl?

Sweet Christ, McDaniel is summoning up the debunked poisoned Halloween candy panic. When Clinton said Republicans were going to scare voters, he probably assumed they’d deliver some new material. They’ve let Slick Willy down. McDaniel might want suburban moms freaking the fuck out over rainbow fentanyl, but my neighborhood's lousy with suburban moms. No one's cancelled Halloween yet. Drug cartels are evil but they're also a business. There is no sustainable business model in poisoning kids for laughs. That's why the Joker kept going bankrupt. He literally set money on fire.

MCDANIEL: You saw Kevin McCarthy tell the story last week of a 13-year-old that showed up at school with those candy-looking fentanyl pills and it killed an official just by opening it

Yes, unfortunately, we did see McCarthy spin his urban campfire tale, which Media Matters confirmed was less grounded in reality than the monster movies your kids will watch on Halloween. Romney thinks saying "You saw (SOMEONE LIE)" magically makes the statement verifiable.

Parents, don't listen to this asshole. Please enjoy Halloween with your kids and then vote against Republicans in November.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."

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