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Rep. Trey Gowdy (R-Benghazi) has a real hard job. As chairman of the Benghazi Committee to Benghazi Hillary Clinton's Presidential Campaign For Doing Benghazi In Benghazi, the buck to stop Hillary's inevitable presidency stops with him. And he's doing a real shit job of it.

On Sunday, the Democratic ranking member of the committee, Rep. Elijah Cummings, sent a letter to Chairman Gowdy about the committee's latest "problem," which is a really polite word for dick-crushing fucktastrophe. In his own letter earlier this month, that somehow mysteriously was leaked to the press -- gosh, no idea how that keeps happening -- Gowdy claimed to have uncovered a smoking gun from Hillary's personal YogaGranny@Hillz.com email. Hillz had received an email containing, according to Gowdy, the classified identity of a CIA source and forwarded it to her colleagues from said personal email. This, said Gowdy, "proved" Hillary had lied about not using her personal email for classified information, compromised national security, jeopardized American lives, and thus obviously did Benghazi on purpose, IMPEACH. No, seriously IMPEACH! (Oh, and Vote Republican for president, of course.)

Too bad for Gowdy that Cummings took it upon himself to ask the CIA about it, and extra too bad for Gowdy that the CIA said nope, bullshit. Writeth Cummings:

Contrary to your claims, the CIA yesterday informed both the Republican and Democratic staffs of the Select Committee that they do not consider the information you highlighted in your letter to be classified. Specifically, the CIA confirmed that “the State Department consulted with the CIA on this production, the CIA reviewed these documents, and the CIA made no redactions to protect classified information.

In fact, the "redacted" information in Gowdy's smoking gun letter was redacted by -- hang on to your hats, folks! -- Gowdy himself and not, as Cummings notes, "by any agency of the federal government responsible for enforcing classification guidelines." Gowdy apparently "classified" and redacted that information himself -- for dramatic effect, we guess -- to make it appear that Hillary had done a wrong. Clever!

And he might have gotten away with it too, if Cummings hadn't bothered to check with the CIA because whoa if true. To rub a little salt in Gowdy's festering wound, Cummings added:

Unfortunately, you sent your letter on October 7 without checking first with the CIA. Now that we have done so, we have learned that your accusations were incorrect.

Sure is hard to imagine why anyone would believe the real purpose of the committee is to try to make Hillary Clinton look guilty of bad things to drive down her poll numbers and prevent her election to the White House. And not just because House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy (and also-ran for House speaker, hahaha) said that's exactly what the committee is trying to do.

Maybe that's why Gowdy lost it on Sunday and told his fellow Republicans to STFU about what his little committee is up to these days because he's still trying to pretend it's about Four Dead Americans and not about stopping Madam Hillz:

“I have told my own Republican colleagues and friends, ‘Shut up talking about things that you don’t know anything about,’” he said. “And unless you are on the committee, you have no idea what we have done, why we’ve done it.”

Silly us to assume the House majority leader might have an inkling of what this Very Important Committee is intended to accomplish. Shut up, Kevin McCarthy, stop confirming what everyone already knew about Gowdy's investigation!

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Sad poor bastard Trey Gowdy. Just a few weeks ago, his idiot colleague Rep. John Fleming gossiped on the 'SPAN to everyone that Gowdy was quitting this stupid job and going back to South Carolina, forcing him to order his staff to issue vague promises that nuh uh, he's not going nowhere just this second and he will investigate Benghazi today, investigate Benghazi tomorrow, investigate Benghazi forever!

But he's not going to do it gracefully. He can't stop boo-hooing like a common House Republican about how very hard indeed it is to be Trey Gowdy:

“I would say in some ways these have been among the worst weeks of my life,” Gowdy said this weekend during a lengthy interview with POLITICO. “Attacks on your character, attacks on your motives, are 1,000-times worse than anything you can do to anybody physically — at least it is for me.”

Really, Rep. Gowdy? People questioning your questionable character and motives is the worst possible thing, huh? You really can't imagine anything worse? Not even being one of those four Americans who were murdered by Hillary Clinton's bare hands in Benghazi?

Well, maybe being Trey Gowdy isn't quite that bad. But almost.

[Cummings's Letter / The Guardian / POLITICO]

 

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