Sarah Palin Does Not Like Smearing Donald Trump With Pee
Sarah Palin can tell from up there in Alaska that this so-called "intelligence dossier" from an old "British" spy, that says Russia has been cultivating Donald Trump as an asset for years, that the Trump campaign actively colluded with Russia, and also too PEE HOOKERS PEE HOOKERS PEE HOOKERS, is a buncha apple sauce and moose dookie! She's been monitorin' Russia for years, from her back porch, so she woulda known if Donald Trump was up to some malarkey, you betcha. So she took a slurp out of her vodka Big Gulp and instructed her ghostwriter to make a blog on her website, debunking the story once and for all.
You have probably heard by now that Buzzfeed broke several codes of journalistic integrity and published wild accusations against Trump that were completely unverified.
In other words, they sacrificed their integrity in order to attack a political candidate they didn’t like.
Not exactly the most honorable thing in the world.
Oh fuck off, Sarah. First of all, Buzzfeed's gonna Buzzfeed, and also the site, when publishing the intelligence dossier, said at the outset that it contained errors, that nobody knows how much of it is true, but that this is the document that's been going around Washington FOR MONTHS. It's a document that was first reported on by David Corn at Mother Jones, and U.S. intelligence is taking it seriously enough that it included it in briefings given to both President Barack Obama and Future Pussburglar-In-Chief Donald Trump. (For a better understanding of how the intelligence community views this document, click here, and for a full-throated defense of why Buzzfeed was right to publish it, check out those lamestream hacks over at the Columbia Journalism Review.)
Back to Palin:
They have been getting absolutely destroyed by their colleagues in the media and even liberals like Chuck Todd agreed with Donald Trump’s conclusion that Buzzfeed had published “fake news”.
There are many reasons to doubt Buzzfeed’s report.
Oh fuck off, Sarah. It's not "Buzzfeed's report," it's a document dump from a real spy that happens to have been published by Buzzfeed.
And fuck off, Chuck Todd, a hack if there ever was one, a man who has literally no clue what journalists are supposed to do, and doesn't have time to learn, since he spends most of his days handing out free rimjobs to whoever is currently in power.
You will be shocked to learn that that's basically Sarah's entire blog post, at least the only part that's "in her own words." The rest is a blockquote of Jim Geraghty at National Review, who put on his own journalism thinking cap and decided this raw intelligence document is so fake, based on his expertise working at, ahem, National Review.
Here are some of the gems, from Jim Geraghty's brain:
[O]ne major detail in the memo is already proven false: a claim of [Trump lawyer Michael] Cohen secretly meeting with Kremlin officials in Prague in August. If that part is made up, there’s no reason to put more faith in the other allegations.
That is exactly backward from how analysts study raw intelligence, dumbass. It's about culling through and figuring out what's TRUE, based on finding more and more sources. One debunked claim from a series of reports (has everyone read the whole thing?) does not debunk the entire dossier. Idiot.
For a memo allegedly written by “a former British intelligence agent,” it contains only a few British spellings of words. (I found “cauterise” and “favourably.”)
WE ALREADY KNOW IT'S A FUCKING REAL DOCUMENT. That is not in question, meth brain! Also, maybe the British spy is bilingual and can spell words in Queen's English AND American.
The author uses the term “e-mail,” not “email”. This is generally the older way of referring to electronic mail.
Oh holy fuck, the spy May Not Be Aware Of All Current AP Stylebook Traditions, WHAT A FAKE!
Some pages have hand-written numbering in the corner, some do not.
Jim Geraghty really should consider holding a clinic for how spies should write up raw intelligence reports.
Two explosive but implausible claims on page 7. First, “PUTIN motivated by fear and hatred of Hillary CLINTON.” Hatred, I guess I can see, but fear? Really? You think he was afraid of what a Clinton administration would do to Russia?
Well, Putin has despised Hillary ever since she publicly called Russia's sham elections out for being sham elections, but Jim Geraghty ain't askeered o' that bitch, so how could Putin be askeered?
Do we need to blockquote more, or can we just say "OH FUCK OFF, Jim Geraghty" like we did to the other people in this piece, and add an extra "fuck off" for Sarah Palin and Chuck Todd, and also too a hearty "UP YOURS, ASSHOLE"?
TRICK QUESTION, we just did all those things, and now this post is over.