He's just not very good at this


Gov. Scott "Look at my big Reaganesque balls" Walker has been having a hell of a time trying to figure out where he fits on the Republican spectrum of hating brown American citizens. In the span of a week, he was against birthright citizenship, guaranteed in the 14th Amendment. Then he was "not taking a position," and now he's come around again, and he is definitely opposed to changing the Constitution, at least until lunchtime tomorrow, at which point, who even knows?

[contextly_sidebar id="Qo8im1RtFnQglbNiOJkLsqDbUdeCOxQG"]

But here's a position he is not afraid to take: Muslims -- pretty much all 1.6 billion of them -- are bad!

At a campaign stop at a VFW hall in Derry, New Hampshire, Walker said radical Islamic terrorists are at war with America, Israel, Christians, Jews and “it’s a war against even the handful of reasonable, moderate followers of Islam who don’t share the radical beliefs that these radical Islamic terrorists have.”

We don't know exactly what "handful" means, but a campaign spokeslady refused to respond to the question of whether the governor was, like, serious about that, or whether he might want to walk back his statement and say, "Oops, I counted wrong, it's at least four and a half handfuls."

The spokeslady did, however, insist that actually, Walker super hearts Muslims because he's just lookin' out for them:

The governor knows that the majority of ISIS’s victims are Muslims. Muslims who want to live in peace – the majority of Muslims – are the first target of radical Islamic terrorists.

So really, when Walker says all the Muslims, except for those coupla cool reasonable dudes (who, presumably, will be allowed to keep their pensions when Walker is president), are engaged in "radical Islamic terrorism," what he really means is that he wants to wage a war on radical Islamic terrorism to save those handful of Muslims who are the REAL victims, see?

[contextly_sidebar id="F97veUiSpqOz7PIdW9KEX7kREqIiWd0K"]

No. No, you don't see, because it doesn't make any sense. But don't spend too much time thinking about it. This particular position Walker felt bold enough to take isn't likely to last either.

[Wisconsin State Journal]

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc