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Seattle, you have been waiting long and you have been waiting hard for a Wonkette Drinky Thing and Lovepile of your very own. You have been waiting long and hard because WE HATE YOU. But considering you are such dedicated Wonkers that you have thrown your own Fauxty Things, and considering also your comrade and our web developer Shypixel lives in Missoula, Montana, which is reasonably close to Seattle, and we wanted to meet him after doing much flirting and sexual harassing in the sexcret wonket chatcave, to which he responded quite positively, we decided to throw you one anyway. (Again, to be clear: this was so we could meet Shypixel, not so we could buy you beer, because of how WE HATE YOU.) Luckily, our date with Shypixel -- which has lasted 19 days so far -- is still going kind of okay, we guess. Right now we are on an island -- a literal island, where we have thrown crab pots at crabs and thrown rocks at the water and thrown our dog at a deer, for murdering -- so, you know, whatever. "Date."


When and where is this Seattle Drinky Thing and Sexy Twister Match going to occur? How about this Saturday, Sept. 27, 6-10 p.m., at the Rhino Room, 1535 11th Avenue, Seattle. We think that might be in Capitol Hill, but do not know because we are not overly familiar with Seattle because WE HATE IT.

Also, we really are leaving at 10 p.m. this time instead of getting all liquored up and closing shit down like we did in SF, because the very next morning we are driving to Montana, with Shypixel, in our lesbian U-haul. As one does on a first date.

Normally here is where we would put our pictures from our fantastical Portland meetup this past lovely Saturday, but Shypixel's group shots were simply not up to par. (Heh. Heh.) (Confidential to Portland Jeanne, have your delightfully mustachioed husband send pix ASAP to rebecca at wonkette period com!)

In conclusion: beer.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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