Shocking: Pervy Congressman Blake Farenthold, Six-Millionaire, Ain't Wanna Pay His Sex-Harassment Settlement!

Shocking: Pervy Congressman Blake Farenthold, Six-Millionaire, Ain't Wanna Pay His Sex-Harassment Settlement!

We are sorry to tell you, taxpayers of America, that Blake Farenthold, the weird creepy disgraced Congressman who had us foot the bill for the sexual harassment suit he had to settle with a staffer, turns out to not be a man of unimpeachable integrity! Is this perhaps why he’s the subject of Ethics Committee investigations? Probably!

You may perhaps remember finding out that there was a thing called the Office of Compliance, and that the not-at-all-dystopically-named office handles workplace violations for Congressional offices, and that’s how we wound up using the public purse to pay out an $84,000 settlement to a woman who was harassed by her boss. We remind you that said boss is this guy pictured above, and that frankly we think (which we have a right to, given that we pay taxes and shit and so we are allowed to complain about too little spending on important and worthy causes) that she should have gotten twice as much at least. We are upset that the settlement was not adequate.

When everyone found out about this office and the settlement, of course, the rapey rep promised to PERSONALLY put a check into Paul Ryan’s hot little hands (though of course this wouldn’t be an admission of anything, he’s still saying this whole thing is just silly!)

and then ...

He didn’t put a check in Paul Ryan’s hot little hands, because he wants to see what Congress might do with something called the Congressional Accountability Act. The changes under consideration are, for once, good? Like they’re trying to ensure that victims are fairly treated and that there’s someone whose job will be ensuring that’s the case? We are not sure why those changes would have anything to do with whether Farenthold should repay his settlement money! But hey, it’s 2018 and who knows what the hell that scamp Ryan will get up to this session, so we assume that the super-ethical disgraced Congressman is hoping the GOP will save him from having to literally pay for his own mistakes!

We here at yr Wonkette would like to remind you that this is why we’re still feminists, because only a dude could get away with this bullshit. We also have a theory that Rep. Farenthold is Making America Great Again by being griftier than any of the Trumps so that they look better by comparison.

It seems as likely as any other possibility.


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