Well now, Fox has done an about-face and is pretending like it has always been at war with coronavirus. But there's good news, because even as they're starting to figure out how to deliver some actual science knowledge to their viewers, they're also figuring out how to keep delivering that trademark Fox News garbage bullshit their audience hoovers up like fentanyl-laced Metamucil.

For an example, we go to Fox News "medical expert" Dr. Nicole Saphier, who knows why all the kids are out there spring-breaking naked in the streets, while coronavirus rages:

SAPHIER: They like to take it to the streets, as AOC says, they do protests, they think they are invincible!

Hahahahahaha fuck you.

SAPHIER: They're gonna force themselves into position of martial law where we're gonna need to quarantine them!

Saphier also says there are "fewer older and older people in the hospital now, because people ARE listening to Dr. [Deborah] Birx and Dr. [Anthony] Fauci," whereas these kids with BAD PARENTS, who like to protest, LIKE AOC SAYS, well, they are definitely the bad ones.

The "Fox & Friends" idiot couch, which was probably licking the floor as recently as a week ago to prove that the so-called "virus" was a Deep State hoax, was discussing an article in the New York Times that says 38 percent of those hospitalized for coronavirus in the US so far are between ages 20 and 54, giving lie to the myth that this is just an Old Balls disease. (Risk of death is still far higher for olds.)

That gave the collection of morons, including their "medical expert," their opening to blame those obnoxious spring-breaking kids on the beach in Florida on Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Because Fox News.

Hello, Generation X here. We agree that those spring breaking kids are the worst. We also agree that fucking Boomers, especially white Boomers, are also the worst. Indeed, those are the two generations, out of all the generations, that need to be TAUGHT A THING right now. Entire articles have been written by people in their 30s and 40s about how they can't seem to get their goddamned parents to listen to facts right now and cancel their golf brunches, because Boomers are all "LAH-DI-DAH, WE'VE LIVED THROUGH IT ALL, IT'LL BE FIIIIIIIIIINE." These articles feature quotes from 30/40-somethings like "I'm going to kill them before COVID does."

We have been trying to be gentle about this, but the damn fact of the matter is that it is all of us Gen-X-ers and older Millennials — we, the current caretaker generation — who are doing the most from a social perspective to try to keep this from spreading to high-risk Americans, many of whom are what we might call FOX NEWS REPUBLICAN MORON ASSHOLE SELFISH MOTHERFUCKER BOOMERS. (Not trying to be gentle? Middle-school kids, who apparently have taken to calling corona the "Boomer remover." Godforsaken little shits, LOL.)

And again, we agree that those college party spring break kids are also little shits, just like their grandparents. We are just as pissed off at them as anybody else, and they need to GTFO the beach and get the fuck home, but you're going to blame Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez for that, in your little shitmouthed drive-by Fox News way? Go fuck yourself, you asshole, and wash your goddamn hands.


For the record, here is what AOC the Millennial/Gen Z rabble rouser who makes the kids run around in the streets was saying about coronavirus five days ago.

And here's what Fox News has been saying, before it realized maybe it might accidentally kill all of Sean Hannity's fans and not very quickly changed course:

How Fox News has shifted its coronavirus rhetoric www.youtube.com

Dr. Nicole Saphier has appeared on Wonkette a couple times. Last time it was because she was complaining that universal healthcare just takes away all the bootstraps incentives for people to make healthy choices. She thinks Obamacare made people less healthy. She is a fucking dick.

But hey, we are glad Fox News is at least trying to keep its viewers from keeling over dead now from what they racistly call the "Chinese virus," after spending months telling viewers it was a hoax. A self-interested business decision? Surely probably most likely.

Kinda hard to have a propaganda network if all your viewers are currently dead.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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