Donate

On this dumb American night when Tracy Morgan is announcing his exploratory committee and an "anal sex joke" named Rick Santorum still gets Campaign 2012 news coverage, let's all remember poor little rich boy Mitt Romney. He's been running for president since approximately 1965, which was just about when Maureen Dowd first heard "Subterranean Homesick Blues" and freaked the hell out because Dylan "went electric" and also hired Chairman Mao to play the Hammond B-3 organ. Mitt Romney did not care for the radical-socialist peace-nik culture, however. He did not care for this at all! The America of 1965 was such an assault on Mitt's delicate sensibilities that he moved to France in 1966. This is completely true and a tragically forgotten part of The Mitt Romney Story.


Romney moved to Paris in 1966, and lived in France until 1968 -- some of the heaviest, sexiest years of a very revolutionary decade in a very French country. Mitt even speaks fluent French, obviously.

But did Mitt get busy with Brigitte Bardot? Did he man the barricades with the student left? Nah. Mitt Romney just walked around like a square for two years, trying to sell his folksy no-coffee no-anal American lifestyle to the French, who thought it was all some kind of brilliant new-wave deadpan satire. (Nope. Just Mormonism!)

But to celebrate his already forgotten campaign announcement video, in which he dumbly held up a sign so that webtards could substitute various funny messages,, here is the original "Subterranean Homesick Blues" promotional film (that's Allen Ginsberg just hanging out on the left) followed by the almost as good parody by Weird Al.

$
Donate with CC

The great journalists at the National Enquirer regularly sent advance digital copies of stories about Donald Trump and his political opponents to Michael Cohen, according to a story in the Washington Post, which cited "three people with knowledge of the matter" as sources. Probably Trump was one of them, you know how he is.

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

Times have been tough for those Trump supporters who are fine with his rampant bigotry but are discovering he's going to screw them like any number of non-wife-like women he totally swears he's never met.

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
Donate

SINGLE & MONTHLY DONATIONS

SUPPORT THE CAUSE - PAYPAL DONATION

PAYPAL RECURRING DONATIONS

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc