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Texas Congressarmadillo Steve Stockman, veteran of such memorable stunts asinviting Ted Nugent to join him for the State of the Union Address and tongue-kissing the Obama Rodeo Clown guy (which we'd somehow forgotten...How did our republic ever weather that crisis?), had this tech-savvy insight today, which an aide probably explained to him as he tapped it out with two fingers. Because after all, rolling out a website that's supposed to handle the insurance marketplaces for consumers in 36 states isn't that much different from coding an in-browser version of an 8-bit videogame from 28 years ago, is it? (Not to take anything away from Josh Goldberg, the Rensselaer student who pulled off the game. It's pretty swell, but it's not a multi-state insurance marketplace, not even if you et all the coins.)


Now that the Great Big Government Shutdown is all over, now it's time for the problems of the Healthcare.gov website to turn into a crisis that is every bit as shocking and unbelievable as the rodeo clown, the teleprompter scandal, or perhaps IRSghazigate, with endless hearings, sober denunciations of the Kenyan Imposter's imcompetence (we happen to know that he wastes a good 20 minutes fiddling around with different fonts, and then just settles on Times New Roman every fucking time), and eventual promises of impeachment. And he can't even get a stupid little website to work.

Also, we feel compelled to note that, in what may be a bit of a setback for Rep. Stockman's analogy, Josh Goldberg's Super Mario Bros. website has been crashing from heavy traffic ever since tech bloggers started talking about how amazing it is.

[Twitter / Slate]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

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4. MONEY.

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