Texas Won't Let Lesbian Get Driver's License, Because Jesus And Shut Up Is Why
A woman who recently moved to Texas from Californiacan't get a Texas driver's license under her married name, because she's married to another lady, and Texas just don't think that's respectable.
Connie Wilson and her partner Aimee relocated to the Houston area with their three kids. Connie took on Aimee's last name when they were legally married in California more than a year ago.
However, Connie Wilson said she is now being told that name doesn't legally belong to her in the Lone Star State.
"It's really hard to accept that someone is telling me I can't have my name," she said. "I was denied based on a marriage license."
OK, first of all, "they" don't have three kids because that is unpossible, and whoever birthed them babbies has between one and three kids by her own self, and the other woman is just a Sin Mommy. Second, if you want to pretend it's possible to be married to a lady, you need to stay in Californication, where such things are tolerated, not in Texas, where they have more important things to think about, like being scared of ISIS even though the state government appears to share its moral code. And third, your marriage doesn't exist in Texas, and so neither does your alleged last name. This is just logic. Next you will probably want to eat your pudding without having any meat first, and then it's just anarchy.
Even though she should have known better, Wilson actually did try to get a driver's license as if she were a real person (as we all know, there is no such thing as a gay person). She had her California driver's license, birth certificate, Social Security card, and marriage license. But the Department of Public safety employee was not able to process the completely insane information Wilson shoved at her:
"The DPS employee looked at it... looked all over it... noticed it was a woman's name at the top and her immediate response was, 'Is this same?'" Wilson said.
Wilson was told that her married last name cannot appear on a Texas driver's license because same-sex marriage isn't legal in the state.
We're pretty sure the DPS person was just moments away from a complete system failure, babbling "Illogical...illogical... woman cannot marry woman... does not compute," with smoke coming out of her ears and a high-pitched electronic squeal.
Also, just to make things that little extra degree of stupid, Wilson also can't use her unmarried name without paying a name change fee and going to court.
"I'm being prohibited from having the last name of my children. I think that's a violation of me as a person," Wilson said. "I may as well pick another name out a hat."
If she's going to have to legally change her name, she may as well do it up right and go with something practical, like "Rickperry S. Amotherfucker."
Wilson is also seeking help from a community activist, and state Sen. Sylvia Garcia is also looking into the wretched mess. Let's hope that Wilson can get it resolved in time to vote -- not that this brain-dead policy was actually designed to disenfranchise anyone. We're sure that, just like Texas's refusal to process ID cards for gay military spouses, it's mostly just an effort to be as pissy as humanly possible, and denying a transplanted lesbian the vote is just a happy side effect. It's a bit of an echo of the Jim Crow era -- there's no real reason to be so mean about it, but every little reminder that someone is not a real citizen is just a fun little assertion that they don't count. We bet the DPS clerk had a good chuckle about how frustrated that dyke was.
It also turns out that Ms. "Wilson" -- or whoever she turns out to be -- isn't alone: Nebraska pulled the very same shit in August, all in the effort to protect traditional marriage. Because if you can't make life miserable for someone whose life you disapprove of, what's the point of even having a government?
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.