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On this week's Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report, Presented By Fartknocker, Sarah Palin picks on Connecticut State Rep. Juan Candelaria for having the GALL to propose a tax on sugary soft drinks. Doesn't Rep. Candelaria know that taxes kill jobs?


But rather than learning this Dummycrat about how taxes make all jobs die forever, Sarah Palin explains the real problem: that ISIS exists, and therefore the Connecticut General Assembly—and by extension Barack Obama, we suppose?—had better get its act together, goshdarnit.

This video is perfect, an eternal golden braid of derp, and we are going to blockquote it at length:

Get this, a Connecticut Democrat has proposed legislation to tax sugary drinks at one cent per teaspoon of sweeteners, like sugars! Theses types of taxes, they're designed to discourage certain behaviors, kinda mold the person into what some politician perceives as an ideal person, according to their own priorities.

Some taxes are indeed designed to place incentives—positive or negative—around certain behaviors. Like the way we give people free federal money just for forming babbies and popping them out of their belly buttons or however it works! By this standard, Sarah Palin has kinda molded herself into what some politician perceives as an ideal person at least five times.

Those are called 'sin taxes.' But wait a second: liberals are now all of a sudden interested in sin? Well how judgmental!

This is what political satire sounds like when you've inhaled too much methane from the melting permafrost.

During a time when Christians are being targeted and murdered by radical Islam, when the Obama administration still isn't serious about jihad, when our national debt is sky-high and growing every day, and when our borders are open and we're rewarding illegal aliens whose first act upon our soil is to break our laws—yeah our borders aren't secure—well, really, soda? That should be way down on the list of government concerns.

Rep. Candelaria's proposed sugar tax has been tabled and is currently awaiting a hearing in the Connecticut House Committee on Finance, Revenue, and Bonding. That's a pretty good indication that a tax on sugary sodas is indeed "way down on the list of government concerns," but Yr Wonket is confident that Sarah Palin's subscribers have Trusted But Verified this fact-flavored nugget from Governor Quitterface. Besides, mentioning the disposition of Rep. Candelaria's bill would take the piss out of this whole post, and what is Palin going to do, spend another three minutes shooting a different video?

Then Palin goes into the history books, which you brainwashed progressives probably haven't even read.

Prohibition didn't work well the first time around, did it? Shoot, if people want sugar, like me? We're gonna get it!

An outstanding historical comparison from "Lou Sarah," because prohibition was nothing more than a one-cent tax on alcohol. You really do learn stuff from watching her Internet teevee channel.

Okay Sarah, big finish!

Hey Democrats, why don't you stop your moral preening and actually work to fix some things that are wrong in our nation?

In last week's Fartknocker Report, Presented By Fartknocker, we wondered if Palin was sincere or just trolling. This week, we believe we have our answer.

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report, presented by Fartknocker, was brought to you by Fartknocker.

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DHS photo (Every damn ICE pic looks like this)

Donald Trump's immigration goon squads were all set to start mass arrests and deportations of families in multiple cities Sunday, but before the raids started, he tweeted Saturday that he'd decided to delay the operation by two weeks -- to allow Democrats a chance to join Republicans in trashing US asylum law. Trump took a phone call Friday evening from Nancy Pelosi urging him to hold off on the raids, although it's also possible that internal disagreements about the operation at the Department of Homeland Security may have been part of the reason for the delay, too. In the meantime, Trump gets to terrify undocumented families some more and rant about deporting "millions," although the planned operation was actually targeted only at a couple thousand people who have already received deportation orders.

Immigration and Customs Enforcement had been gearing up to start raids in 10 US cities, including Los Angeles, Chicago, Miami, and Baltimore, to show how tough America is, and never mind that the sweeps would certainly have led to more family separations, as ICE scooped up at least some undocumented parents of children born in the US. The news also comes while the media is reporting filthy, inhuman conditions at the border camps where newly arrested immigrants, including babies, are being packed in, leading to plenty of awkward questions about why the government suddenly wants to arrest more people in the interior of the country? (Hint: President Eichmann just announced his reelection bid.)

The Great Deporter announced the delay of the operation Saturday by Twitter, as if that were normal, then followed up with more bluster Sunday.

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Kamala Harris was holding it down at the South Carolina Democratic Convention this weekend, and she wasn't just there to kick it at Clyburn's Fish Fry, hang out with Berndog Sanders, and just look extra good. No. She fucking running for President, and she's actually got a chance, unlike the many Mayo Casserole Men who keep jumping into the damn race. Why did they jump in after Kamala and Elizabeth Warren, the only people who are even running, clearly said, "We got it from here, boys"? Not sure, but regardless, it was unnecessary. Doesn't matter anyway because who is gonna remember Dadface McDorksky when Kamala is turning it the fuck out with speeches indicting Trump?

Do you believe in America? Kamala Harris believes in America, and her Saturday speech calls out for justice, and righteousness; where Barack Obama struck hopeful, dulcet, aspirational tones, Harris strikes sharp chords of urgency. To say that she read Trump the riot act would be, and is, an understatement; what she did here raised a crucial reality that some Dems refuse to see. Trump MUST be prosecuted. The Democratic nominee will wear many hats, and one of the most important of those hats is that of a prosecutor. There is a case to be made against Donald J. Trump, hell, there are so many cases, and as far as Harris is concerned, who better to make that case, but a COP? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Kamala Harris at the South Carolina Democratic Convention June, 22 2019 youtu.be

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