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How many times do we have to cancel R. Kelly? It seems like every time we cancel his ass, he pops back up begging us to cancel his ass again. Last time we begged him to go away, we spent years having to explain that it is not okay to sleep with and piss on teenage girls. Also, the sex cult allegations are just too weird to process right now, but R. Kelly seems determined to make us think about horrible shit year after year.


This time, we have a BBC3 documentary about Kitti Jones, who once worked in radio as a DJ, accusing Kelly of coercing her into sex acts, starvation, and physical abuse, before discussing her escape from his “sex cult.” On top of that, a lawsuit has been filed by an unnamed victim, and apparently, the “Devil” is responsible for this entire thing, according to R. Kelly.

The “Devil” has been super busy running around for years and years, just lying on poor R. Kelly, who just wants you to know how innocent and Christian he is and that the media is making his life hell. Pretty much says this is “fake news” without using the words “fake news,” which leads us to believe he is lying his ass off. But no worries!! Mr. Kelly says this is all just some bullshit created by nefarious forces who want to undermine the career of a God Fearing Christian Man like himself. He has no clue why his shows are cancelled (dude, really?), and points to the fact that there is no criminal investigation. Why are we pressing him so hard, he wants to know? He says the ladies stay with him because they want to.

He also wants you to know that this hurts him most of all, and that he is being victimized by nosy people, but at least he still has music. He is simply heartbroken.

My focus has always been music and being in the music industry. At this time, my faith and my love for music are the only things that has not been affected. The devil is a liar. To whom much is given, from him much expected.

Maybe if you focused more on music and less on gathering up as many women as you can find to please you and call you Daddy, you wouldn't constantly be accused of sex crimes? This is just a question. Most people don't seem to find themselves in this situation year after year, no matter how busy the "Devil" is. We would really like to know why the "Devil" has been following Kelly around for decades making people accuse him of nefarious deeds.

Unfortunately for Mr. Kelly, the “Devil” is not accusing him of sexual abuse, actual women are accusing him of sexual abuse. And now that Time’s Up is on his ass letting him know that his time was up a long ass time ago, maybe this time he will go away. We doubt it, but it would be nice if he would stop getting away with allegedly abusing women, go collect his life, and shut the fuck up trying to blame the “Devil” for his problems.

[The Grio/Metro]

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Wonderbitch

Wonderbitch aka Bravenak aka Bianca DeLaRosa, loves her jobs as Social Media Manager for Wonkette more than Sarah Huckabee Sanders loves lying to America. Bianca also moonlights as a Witch (THE BAD KIND!!) and is a Freelance Goddess of All Things Ever. Be very nice her because she likes to curse people, especially mean people.

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Y'all saw that crazy shit that happened at the White House today when Chuck 'n' Nancy went to visit Trump to talk about averting a government shutdown, and Chuck 'n' Nancy ended up playing foosball with Trump's face while he screamed "WALL!" over and over again? It was so great.

During the meeting, Trump interrupted Pelosi a whole lot, and she responded by not giving a fuck and making fun of him to his face about how all she does is win, while Trump was left to whine about how nobody ever talks about how "he" won the Senate for the GOP. (The Senate election schedule, which heavily favored Republicans in the 2018 midterms, won the Senate for the GOP.)

When Pelosi walked out of the White House, she looked like some kinda badass spy walking away at the perfect moment, right before the building explodes. (We are not saying Nancy Pelosi blowed up the White House! OK fine, she did it WITH VOTES.)

But Pelosi's day of dick-punching Trump right in his orange face was not over!

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James Alex Fields mugshot

This morning, after spending Monday hearing victim impact statements, the jury in James Alex Fields's trial -- which on Friday found him guilty on all 10 counts he was charged with -- delivered their sentencing recommendations.

For the murder of Heather Heyer, the Charlottesville jury gave Fields a life sentence and a fine of $100,000. For each of the three charges of aggravated malicious wounding, they sentenced him to 70 years and fines of $70,000. For each of the five charges of malicious wounding, 20 years in prison and fines of $10,000, and nine years for the hit and run. All in all, this comes out to a life sentence plus 419 years and $480,000. Judge Richard Moore accepted the jury's verdicts, but will hold off on officially sentencing Fields until March 19.

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