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Photo by Gage Skidmore, Creative Commons license 2.0

Everyone's all a-twitter today about Mitt Romney's great big dinner of crow at Trump International Hotel in New York Tuesday. Does it mean Trump's going to offer Romney the job as secretary of state, so the Haired One can say there's at least one relatively sane person in his administration? Has Mitt forgotten all those nasty things he said about Trump during the campaign? Is Donald Trump seriously putting together a "team of rivals," for the good of America? Was there a powerful, exotic mind control agent in the scallops? No one knows for sure, although the little glowing bulb on his head and his repeated utterances of "I will do what Donald says" have not yet been adequately explained.


Both the Trumposphere and Romney's vocalization synthesis processor are putting a nice, amiable spin on the dinner, which Reince Priebus joined as well, although he appears to have been there mostly as a conveniently sized mass to be placed between Trump and Romney if necessary. After the dinner, Romney said,

I happen to think that America's best days are ahead of us [...] And what I've seen through these discussions I've had with President-elect Trump, as well as what we've seen in his speech the night of his victory, as well as the people he's selected as part of his transition, all of those things combined give me increasing hope that President-elect Trump is the very man who can lead us to that better future.

Romney then paused, blinked, and asked if anyone would like him to sing "Daisy," which was taught to him by his programmers at HAL Laboratories in Urbana, Illinois.

Trump campaign spokesperson Jason Miller told "Fox & Friends" Wednesday that Trump had "a very good dinner with Mitt Romney last night," and that there are no hard feelings, because after all, the campaign is all over now:

Admittedly, they've been on opposite sides of some of these political issues and some of the battles in the primary. But that also goes to the president-elect and the fact he's putting together, even rivals, to put together this team that can go forward[.]

Miller added that the two had "good chemistry," another comment which could be taken to indicate mind-altering substances were used on the 2012 Republican nominee.

As to whether Romney will actually be offered the secretary of state position, Yr Wonkette is less than convinced. While it would definitely add a certain amount of gravitas -- or at least as much gravitas as Romney can simulate -- to an administration that so far appears to be operating without adult supervision, we suspect Donald Trump's deep need for revenge may undercut his desire to bring on someone who at least knows which fork to use. Our guess is that over the next couple weeks, Trump and company will continue to dangle the job before Romney, if only to see how much they can get him to grovel.

Maybe they can get Mitt to say on camera he doesn't think Russia's all that bad, for instance. Then, once they've completely broken him, Rudy Giuliani will sweep into the room wearing a tiara and sash, kick Mitt in the nuts, and say, "You really thought you had a chance?" Then all the Trumpers will laugh and laugh and laugh as Mitt hobbles out to the lobby of Trump Tower and says he had a productive meeting.

[The Hill / Salon / Mediaite / Photo by Gage Skidmore, Creative Commons license 2.0]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Surprise, everybody! As we suspected, the Trump administration knew about the horrifying family domestic abuse stories in Patrick Shanahan's history, and they were trying to push through his Defense Secretary nomination anyway. We didn't assume they knew because the Trump administration is so very good at vetting people -- it clearly isn't. But, considering the enormity of the story, the question that kept bothering us yesterday when the Shanahan news broke was HOW IN THE HELL DID THEY THINK THIS WOULD STAY SECRET?

CBS News reports:

President Trump said as he departed for Florida Tuesday that he had only learned of Shanahan's family issues for the first time "yesterday."

But that is apparently a lie, or at least we should assume it's a lie, because we should always assume Trump is lying about each and every thing he says, in general. Anyway, whether El Dipshit was personally told, Trump admin people say ayup, they knew all about it:

One senior administration official told CBS News the White House was aware of the incident involving Shanahan's son, but didn't know about the 2010 confrontation. Another official said the White House knew about the 2011 incident dating back to when Bill Shine was White House communications director.

In case you need a quick refresher, the "2010 confrontation" is alleged domestic violence between Shanahan and his ex-wife, whose name is now Kimberley Jordinson, which was detailed in their divorce papers. (The ex-wife was arrested, not Shanahan.) The "2011 incident" is the one where Shanahan's 17-year-old son beat the shit out of his mom -- that same ex-wife -- with a baseball bat and left her in a pool of her own blood, and Daddy appears to have gone to great lengths to cover it up.

As CBS reports, some senators have been very curious as to why they were never informed of this way back in 2017, when Shanahan was nominated to be the deputy secretary of Defense. (He was confirmed.) Did the White House know then? Did Shanahan conceal it from everybody? Is that where the White House vetting process -- which is, again, just awesome, obviously -- went all wrong?

Or does the Trump administration just not think the nominee getting mutually fisticuffy with his wife, and trying to mount a coverup for his son when that son bludgeoned that wife with a baseball bat, is so bad, especially when you are trying to staff your administration with The Best People?

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