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In the Mueller Report, we learned that one of the many times Donald Trump tried to obstruct the lawful investigation into Russian ratfucking of the 2016 election for his benefit, and his campaign's enthusiastic welcome of that Russian ratfucking for his benefit, was in summer 2017, when Trump asked Corey Lewandowski (a private citizen) to call the Justice Department and tell the recused Jeff Sessions that they were only allowed to investigate Russian interference OF THE FUTURE, and to stop focusing on 2016. And if Sessions wouldn't do that, then Trump just might have had to fire him. We assume Trump felt this way based on combined factors of his own criminal knowledge of the Russian active measures to aid and abet his campaign, plus the fact that he is a very weak and sad man with extremely thin skin who views any investigation of election interference as an insult to the legitimacy of his illegitimate election.

But FUTURE election interference, that's just fine, you betcha, WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE, as if Trump could ever be elected associate dogcatcher without Russian interference. (Have we discussed that the great majority of Americans despises him, always has, and always will?)

Well, according to the New York Times, Trump's not really into protecting elections of the future either (this is not news), specifically based on how former Homeland Security secretary Kirstjen Nielsen reportedly TRIED AND TRIED AND TRIED to take a break from putting babies in baby jails lined with beds made out of baby knives (OK maybe not that last part), and instead focus on the important job of shoring up America's election security heading into 2020. But amid her efforts, acting White House chief of staff Mick Mulvaney said whatever you do, don't tell Trump you're doing that, we guess because he already has thin skin about his imaginary Russia-fueled 2020 election victory and definitely not because he's already counting on Russia to fuck up the election for him, in a rat kind of way, again.


Officials said [Nielsen] had become increasingly concerned about Russia's continued activity in the United States during and after the 2018 midterm elections — ranging from its search for new techniques to divide Americans using social media, to experiments by hackers, to rerouting internet traffic and infiltrating power grids.

But in a meeting this year, Mick Mulvaney, the White House chief of staff, made it clear that Mr. Trump still equated any public discussion of malign Russian election activity with questions about the legitimacy of his victory. According to one senior administration official, Mr. Mulvaney said it "wasn't a great subject and should be kept below his level."

Therefore don't do your job, Secretary Nielsen, but if you INSIST on doing your job, under no circumstances let President Babyshits find out you are doing your job, because how can you protect Trump's re-election if you insist on protecting America's elections from hostile foreign ratfuckery? It is just not mathematically possible.

The Times says Nielsen even tried to get the Cabinet together for an all-hands-on-deck meeting to protect the 2020 election, but she gave up.

Now, this is the New York Times, so we need to be on the look-out for former and current Trump administration officials whispering in reporters' ears to make themselves look good, so we will just ask right now: Is the "former senior administration official" talking in Maggie Haberman's ear about how hard Nielsen tried to work on election security for 2020 a person whose name rhymes with "Birjjjjjjjjstejjjjjjn Bielsjen"? And will the Washington Post eventually follow up with more interesting and nuanced reporting that doesn't paint former Secretary JJJJJJJJJJJJJJ as a fuckin' hero? We do not know.

As the Times notes, just a few months back, Trump's intel chiefs released their annual Worldwide Threat Assessment, which stated clear as fuck that Russia is going to be back in 2020, in bigger and more creative ways than before, and their accompanying testimony to Congress reflected that fact. If you'll remember, just after that, Trump got so mad at his intel chiefs that he rage-tweeted about how they need to "go back to school." We remarked at the time that it must be hard for Trump, that he has such a difficult time finding intel chiefs who are as compromised by the Kremlin as he obviously is. Oh well, WOMP WOMP.

So, if this reporting is correct, then Homeland Security and the other departments are trying, but they can't get shit from a White House where National Security Advisor John Bolton has cut cybersecurity staff and the president's feelings are too easily hurt to call a meeting about protecting American elections from the type of foreign interference without which the president wouldn't be stinking up the Oval Office in the first place.

We kid the Times about its access journalism, but we'll note that Jake Tapper has confirmed a lot of this by talking to some other senior admin official, who says it's just as bad as the Times says, and that moreover, Kirstjen Nielsen's DHS really did try. Here are a couple of his tweets:



Kirstjen Nielsen tried, Dan Coats is trying, JOHN BOLTON (who has his own curious Russian ties) wants them all to fuck off, and it's just not a good idea to say "Russia" in front of Donald Trump, because he's sensitive.

What a fuckshow. What a compromised-by-Russian-intelligence fuckshow.

Happy 2020 election, everybody!

[New York Times]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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