Louisiana Gov. Bobby Howdy Doody Jindal wants to be president one day. That's never going to happen, but just in case it does, which it never will, he's promising not to do a single thing in the second half of his second term, because a REAL president would know better than to act like he's still the president and, like, get stuff done.
Oh, you mean the Senate Republicans' love letter to Iran, chicken-scratched by ringleader Tom Cotton, explaining that Obama is only technically and barely even the president?
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Yep, that's the one, and Jindal sure is jealous he got left behind, just because he isn't a senator and didn't get his chance to sign it.
Jindal is so eager to "me too!" with the other cool kids, though, that he is "officially" adding his name to the letter on Tuesday, even though he is not actually a United States senator. Meanwhile, his potential 2016 primary rivals Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, and Lindsey Graham -- all of whom did sign the letter -- have been suspiciously silent ever since. Maybe because they're busy consulting with their advisers about how to get out of looking like a bunch of goddamned traitors to U.S. America?
Jindal, though, who wants the world to know he IS the Honorary 48th Traitor in the Senate, has PLENTY of thoughts to share. Including that Troops-Hatin' Vice President Joe Biden owes actual America-traitoring Tom Cotton an apology. What, you don't believe it? Neither do we, and yet:
Did Joe Biden spit in Tom Cotton's face and we somehow missed it? Nah, he just issued a Sternly Worded Statement that trying to "undercut a sitting President in the midst of sensitive international negotiations" is NOT COOL, man, and "beneath the dignity" of the Senate in which Biden served for 36 years (suck it, Bobby).
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But wait -- where are Biden's over-the-line insults to Great American Hero Tom Cotton?
The author of this letter has been explicit that he is seeking to take any action that will end President Obama’s diplomatic negotiations with Iran.
Wow, that is pretty harsh. Almost as harsh as penning a letter to our enemies telling them to ignore our "president" because he doesn't have any real power, and he sucks anyway.
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Almost.
[Bobby Jindal Twitter via Politico/NYT]
