Was Larry Klayman Too Upset After Getting Beat Down By Wonkette To Show His Face In Court?

Legal

Superlawyer Larry Klayman is at it again. Or not at it again, to be more precise, since the king of competence failed to appear in US District Judge John P. Cronan's digital courtroom last week for a scheduled hearing. Was Klayman hiding his head in shame after getting spanked by your Wonkette in that Florida defamation case? Unclear! It's also unclear whether Klayman's presence would have helped his client, who is currently trying to get the Trump-appointed judge disqualified for being BIASSSSSSSS against conservative Christians.

Can you guess who the client is?


That's right, it's everyone's favorite not-senator, not-judge, and definitely NOT-accused-teen-toucher Roy Moore. Unsurprising, really — we know how much Moore and his lovely wife love Jeeeeoooooo lawyers who aren't actually Jews at all.

Wasn't 2017 THE BEST!

Anyway, Moore and his wife are real mad that Sacha Baron Cohen made them look like gross idiots on his "Who Is America?" television program, so they filed this $95 million defamation suit against him back in 2018.

Larry Klayman and Showtime's lawyers have been duking it out over procedural issues for more than two years now, and are currently enmeshed in a dispute over whether Klayman's deposition of Cohen can be made public. Judge Cronan limited the deposition to one hour, sealed it, and said that he would be available to adjudicate disputes if Klayman and Moore sought to use the time to embarrass Cohen by asking questions irrelevant to the case. Which is obviously just an effort to " protect a famous Hollywood person due to his celebrity status."

As is his wont, Klayman fired off a motion demanding the judge's recusal, citing animus against the Moores that "can only be logically be explained as a reaction to Judge Moore's devout political and religious beliefs" and accusing Cohen of being illegally coached during his deposition.

"Indeed, even a cursory review of Defendant Cohen's deposition shows that Cohen was repeatedly looking downward – most likely at his phone or tablet -- with virtually every question that was posed," he wrote, "and it is thus obvious that he was being illegally fed answers by someone."

No doubt Klayman would have aired these grievances at high decibel had he bothered to show up in court Thursday for a scheduled hearing on the matter. But he did not, although he apparently apologized to the court later for the scheduling mix-up on his end.

Do federal judges like it when lawyers blow off the court?

LOLOLOLOL.

This particular federal judge seems to have had it up to here with Klayman's antics even before this last fuckup. In a December hearing, Judge Cronan threatened to mute the attorney's mic if he continued to interrupt the court, admonishing him, "Mr. Klayman, when the Court speaks, you wait until the Court finishes speaking. I know you've been a lawyer for a long time. I think you should be able to understand that."

And last week he ordered Klayman to "file a letter by May 19, 2021, showing cause why the Court should not refer him to the Grievance Committee of this Court based on his failure to notify the Court of disciplinary sanctions imposed on him in In re Klayman, 228 A.3d 713 (D.C. 2020) and In re Klayman, 991 F.3d 1389 (D.C. Cir. 2021), as required by Local Civil Rule 1.5(h)."

That rule requires an attorney who has been censured or disbarred in another jurisdiction to "deliver a copy of said order to the Clerk of this Court within fourteen days after the entry of the order." Klayman got himself a 90-day suspension from practicing law in the DC Circuit on March 26, and it appears to have slipped his mind to mention it to the court. Poor Larry's been so forgetful lately!

So, Mazal Tov to Messrs. Klayman and Moore on yet another stunning legal victory. What a credit to the legal profession you fine fellows are!

[Courthouse News / Moore v. Cohen docket via Court Listener]

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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.

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