Don't Trump on me.


The Donald Trump Traveling Merchandise Show came to Richmond International Raceway this week, giving yr Wonkette the opportunity to get to know the people who make up his populist movement. Who are they? What makes them tick? Do THEY have any favorite Bible verses? (SPOILER: nope.)

The timing and location of the event were planning genius. Just last month, NASCAR had a big ol' race here, and next month it hosts the Virginia Gun Show. Lots of people would have just left their RVs parked for two months, if it wasn't for the fucking fascist landlords running the RIR. So they're holed up at the Walmart parking lot over off Mechanicsville Turnpike.

An army of volunteers worked the raceway parking lot gathering signatures to get Trump on the Virginia Republican primary ballot. The tailgate atmosphere fell far short of the expected 1980s hair band concert vibe. Based on unscientific observation, the crowd was predominantly white, older than 40, and blue collar. The majority of youths in attendance were dressed strictly according to The Official Preppy Handbook. But at least George Washington showed up:

Pretty strong endorsement for the Virginia crowd.

Inside the rally, things got ugly.

These guys! didn't want to talk or share their names, but they didn't mind sharing their image. Attire by the Halloween store.

Trump took the stage to Joe Esposito's "You're the Best." If this isn't what he uses at all of his rallies, it was a good choice for Richmond, because the local minor league baseball team takes the field to the same song. (Go Nutz!) Before launching into the Trump stump, The Donald did a two-minute ad for Trump Winery, near Charlottesville. It's the YOOOOOGEST vineyard on the east coast. And it's not just big; the wine they make there is so good, Dom Perignon would try to steal their trade secrets. Trump kissed the dead asses of Patrick Henry, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, and George Washington. He must have forgotten to mention Robert E. Lee.

Trump then went for his greatest hits. At the first mention of building a wall on the border, about 10-20 people started protesting his position. They held up signs and chanted "Dump Trump." He remained calm at the lectern and said things like, "It's fine, it's fine, First Amendment and everything." He tried to rile the crowd to drown them out, but the cheering endurance of the Trump fans didn't outlast the protesters, who continued with a few more chants. This agitated the more irritable and itchin' to fight Trump supporters. The only logical thing to do when people disagree with you is to repeatedly yell "Fuck you" at them and then spit in their faces:

 

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