Good god we can't even

[contextly_sidebar id="V8JT5ZyRjDrnPD26Xk5mUufsqILSwZza"]You might have thought last October's story about the 11-year-old Tennessee boy who murdered an 8-year-old neighbor because she wouldn't show him a puppy was one of the bleakest things Yr Wonkette wrote about in 2015, and it was. And now that the boy's been convicted in juvenile court, there's even more awfulness: The State of Tennessee has no earthly idea what to do with the 11-year-old gunman ... gunchild? ... because he's too young for the state's "youth development centers" -- which is a hell of a fine euphemism for juvenile prison, though it sounds too much like a fish hatchery for our taste. The Knoxville News-Sentinel reports that the boy has been "ordered into the custody of the state Department of Children's Services until the age of 19" by Jefferson County Juvenile Court judge Dennis “Will” Roach II, although what sort of rehabilitation and treatment you come up with for an 11-year-old who shot another kid in the chest with a shotgun was not specified.

As you may recall, this nightmare happened in October in White Pine, Tennessee. Eight-year-old McKayla Dyer was playing with her sister and another girl when the boy, her neighbor, asked her to show him a puppy he'd seen her carrying earlier. She refused, so he went and got his father's shotgun, aimed it out the window of his mobile home, and killed her. Following the shooting, the News-Sentinel reports, he threw the shotgun and a pellet pistol out the window. In a detail we hadn't previously known, the boy's parents were at home at the time of the shooting, but didn't come out of their home until Jefferson County deputies arrived, and now we hate all of humanity and want our entire species spayed and neutered. We're done here; let the squirrels or dolphins evolve and see if they do any better.

Note to the National Rifle Association about the effectiveness of firearms safety training for kids: Apparently, it doesn't always take. KXAN TV reports Judge Roach said the boy "had been trained in firearm safety and had been taken hunting by both his father and grandfather." Possibly something may have been overlooked in the "never point a gun at a person" department.

And exactly how depraved is this kid? Pretty messed up; a copy of the juvenile court order obtained by KXAN says that after the shooting, the boy "laughed at the girls," and that while the boy's mother heard the shot, she didn't go to help the victim. The order says that the boy

is in desperate need of help, and our society has a great need for [the boy to] receive it [...] A child who commits first-degree murder cannot be willy-nilly turned loose into society.

[contextly_sidebar id="2E8j3YLNc9uHIgQBYVj5GVWCs8XUvs3m"]The News Sentinel reports that the boy's five siblings have been taken from the home by the Tennessee Department of Children's Services (DCS) and placed with relatives. According to 4th Judicial District Attorney General Jimmy Dunn, the case is not yet closed; Dunn is reviewing the case to determine whether anyone else might be charged, but did not specify whether that includes the boy's parents. As we noted in October, Tennessee law has no requirement that guns be kept locked up (a measure the NRA opposes whenever it's proposed), and the state is pretty squishy on the parents of kids who go and murder someone with a gun:

Tennessee law only allows for the prosecution of parents for providing a handgun to a minor if they know of a “substantial risk that such juvenile will use the handgun to commit a felony,” or if any person over the age of 18, including parents or guardians, knows of a juvenile illegally possessing a firearm at a school or school athletic facility, and fails to report it to law enforcement, according to the Law Center to Prevent Gun Violence, which adds, “Tennessee does not otherwise impose criminal liability on adults who allow children access to firearms.” Probably because they trust Responsible Gun Owners to behave Responsibly, as they always do.

Wouldn't want to infringe on anyone's God-given right to have a boomstick on hand at all times, after all. But maybe there's some kind of law against failing to help the eight-year-old girl your son has just shot to death.

As for the boy, DCS spokesman Rob Johnson says the state is still trying to figure out what to do with him:

"Like any other child, we will conduct an assessment on him to determine his needs and the best place for him," Johnson said. "At this time, it would probably be a placement with a private provider. An 11-year-old is too young to place in one of our youth development centers."

[contextly_sidebar id="WB41ei2ySsKI6APdAi8LSbWUbYEWdWnv"]Knowing how well our great nation's juvenile justice system works, we're certain the boy will get the help he so clearly needs, and that his parents will no doubt eventually get their other five spawn back eventually, after they take some parenting classes or something. Let's hope they also get their guns back, too, because Tennessee is clearly a dangerous place where a family needs a weapon to protect itself from armed sociopaths.

[News Sentinel and KXAN via RawStory / Gun Violence Archive]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.

Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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