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You know what’s wonderful? Living in a post-racial America, where everyone is judged based on the content of their character and not the color of their skin. For example: Tucker Carlson is a dick not because of his race, but because he is a cosmic turd wrapped in leaking anal polyps sent here to punish us for some unknown sin. Hell, racism is so far in The Past that John Roberts and SCOTUS said we don’t need no stinkin Voting Rights Act. But apparently Tennessee never got the memo:


A contractor has fired a cotton warehouse supervisor in Memphis, Tennessee, after two black employees accused him of saying that a microwave and a water fountain were for "whites only."

This is UNPOSSIBLE! Is this story from 2014 or 1954? Because the Supreme Court super-promised that there is no more racism. So this can’t be happening. At least there aren’t any references to lynching, because that would be even more awfuller.

Harris recorded the supervisor, who said, "I need to put a sign here that says 'White People Only'" on a water fountain.

Harris then asked the supervisor what would be done if he were caught drinking from the fountain.

"That's when we hang you," the supervisor said, according to the audio recording, which was obtained by the television station.

Hahaha, nothing like a good lynching joke to increase productivity! Especially at a cotton warehouse! But let’s admit progress when we see it, ok. The employees said that the supervisor did not use the ‘N-Word,’ so hooray! Maybe this is what no racism means, right? Except, “he used the word 'monkey' a lot,” but no one is perfect in a post-racial America, right?

Luckily, this must be an isolated incident. It’s not like there would be any broader racial motivation to, say, restrictive voter ID laws. It’s just honest state legislators trying to make sure that non-existent voter ID fraud stays non-existent, surely not motivated by racial animus, right? Weigh in here, Washington Post:

State legislators who support voter ID laws are motivated in no small part by racial bias, according to a new study from the University of Southern California. The study finds strong evidence that "discriminatory intent underlies legislative support for voter identification laws."

No. We have within us the utmost surprise, as we had no idea that there could be racial bias in a post-racial America. Clearly, the plethora of state legislators who rushed to implement voter ID laws after SCOTUS gutted the VRA did not get the memo that racial bias is a thing of The Past. We are shocked that this happened, truly and utterly shocked, to the point where we would never write ‘we are shocked,’ in a way to imply ‘of course this fucking happened John Fucking Roberts you dick.’

Back to the warehouse in Tennessee, there is an up side: the supervisor was “removed from the warehouse and is no longer employed by the company.” Phew. We can only hope that he was then placed in a DeLorean, sped up to 88 miles per hour, and dropped him off in some far-off future date when we have a black President, hahahahaha, like that would ever happen, LOL.

[AP / Washington Post]

Follow DDM on Twitter (@Wonksplainer), because Twitter is a safe space where there is no racism.

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It started with them damn hats. (Image: Wikimedia Commons)

A guest post by "Knitsy McPurlson," which we suspect is not a real name.

Yr Wonkette is not the only website run by brilliant peoples unafraid to poke people with sharp, pointy sticks. Ravelry.com – a website for knitters, crocheters, and other folks interested in textiles and fiber arts – is poking people with knitting needles, which are very sharp indeed.

This past weekend, Ravelry.com's founders showed the world how easy it is to de-platform white nationalists and racists when they banned all "support of Donald Trump and his administration" from their website, concluding they "cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open white supremacy." Seems like people smart enough to decode a knitting pattern are also smart enough to decode Trump's not-so-hidden message of racism and white nationalism.

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One day, God willing, my grandchildren will click open their history textbooks and read about the Central American migrant internment camps. They'll learn about sick kids, locked in cages, kept hungry and dirty and cold for weeks on end, and they'll be horrified.

"Bubbie," they'll say, "how could this happen in America? How could there be toddlers sleeping on the ground without blankets, without soap or toothbrushes to clean themselves?"

"I don't know. I wish I had done more. I'm ashamed," I'll say. We will all have to answer for this atrocity. But some of us will have to answer more than others. Not just the archvillains like Stephen Miller and John Kelly, but the people who kept right on doing their jobs, even as those jobs morphed into defending concentration camps.

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